Korean Job Discussion Forums

[Sine qua non]

A Korean friend of mine doesn't want to help me, notwithstanding the fact that I have bent over backwards to help this person out on several occasions, spending hours and hours focusing my attention on this person's problems (which were related to my professonal skills).

It must have been related to some kind of lover's spat, because although I sent this person an e-mail that contained no hurtful or otherwise angry content, this person has refused all contact with me. (There had been some mutual misunderstanding, which I had intended to clear up between us with an e-mail; by the way the misunderstanding was primarily my misunderstanding.)

Now I need some help, and this person's help would be so much more valuable to me than another person's. However, this person refuses to accept my e-mails and telephone calls.

I don't mind the refusal to help as much as the way in which the refusal is being made, though I confess that the refusal is irritating as well, considering all of the energy I expended to help this person in the past. It seems like this is a common problem for people living here. With the anti-American protests, anti-Japan protests, etc.

It's not the protest or the message of the protest that makes me wonder if South Korea would be better off fighting all its future wars by its weak, lonely self. It's the way the message is sent, with Catholic priests in Korea protesting the trade discussions (WTF?) or the Korean people jumping over embassy walls to try to insult other nations or the Koreans who took over the U.S. Chamber of Commerce office en-masse in Seoul a few years back and destroyed the furniture and supplies while offering some useless opinion.

[doggyji]

A.

[Sine qua non]

[Qinella]

You shouldn't be rude to doggyji man wtf.. He's always cool and level headed, no matter how much sh.it people talk about his home country. Take it easy with the ungracious comments of him "humbling himself". It really is gauche.

That said, I do agree with his opinion that the two parts of your post are disconnected. Really, the gratuitous extrapolation happens in the middle of the 4th paragraph. You're talking about one guy with whom you've had a personal relationship in the past, and whom you've somehow offended so much that he's erased you from his life. It's totally unreasonable for you to assume his cold shoulder is because of your nationality unless he's personally involved in anti-U.S. demonstrations or propaganda milling.

I think you have a right to be upset at the dude, but there's no need to start criticizing Koreans at large. I guess you could attack me now, or clarify a bit..

[doggyji]

Thanks Qinella, but I admit I was a bit biased and rude because of the past talk with the OP. Let's keep our talk friendly.

[twg]

I have always found Korean rudeness to be more of the unthinking variety than any sort of purposeful maliciousness.

regardless, you seem to have pissed someone off to the point they no longer want to speak to you. You can either get on your knees and kiss ass for forgiveness, or you can learn to do without their help.

[laogaiguk]

doggyji is right.

[rocklee]

[mrsquirrel]

I love the rudeness.

Means nobody notices when I;m being an arsehole

[rocklee]

Are you Australian by any chance?

[mrsquirrel]

Now that is being fucking rude that.

Asking somebody if they are an Aussie.

I'm actually Israeli

[Sine qua non]

A friend of mine cooked doenjang jjigae for dinner for her Korean husband one night (she's not Korean). Since she likes potatoes in soup, she added some potato to the recipe.

He tasted it and said, "That's terrible. It's not supposed to have potato in it." and he refused to eat the meal (this is a rough translation of the Korean that accurately reflects the message conveyed).

WTF? If someone goes through the effort to cook a meal for you, basic human decency means that you don't give that kind of reaction.

It's the disregard for basic manners here that is irritating. I'm not talking about politeness, or suggesting anything about 'savages that must conform to Western concepts of a polite society.'

I'm just talking about the lack of human decency of some people, examples of which I have never seen in other countries.

[mrsquirrel]

Have you been to any other countries?

[markhan]

[Sine qua non]

Canada, Taiwan, Hong Kong, Mexico, U.S., Japan.