| View previous topic :: View next topic |
| Author |
Message |
RACETRAITOR
Joined: 24 Oct 2005
Location: Seoul, South Korea
|
 Posted: Sat Apr 14, 2007 3:41 am Post subject: I totally got jumped today |
 |
|
So I just popped out to the corner store in Namguro to buy some snacks for my sick wife. There was another foreigner in there, which is unusual in this neighbourhood. He was a mountain of a man, with a look of noble determination splashed on his face like paint on a rennaissance canvass.
I said hi and he grinned knowingly. When I left the store, he came out after me. He followed me around the corner and then slammed me up against the wall. I lost my groceries and he smashed me in the face, again and again. I couldn't protect myself against his savage attack.
I begged him to stop, but he kicked me in the stomach.
I was on the ground in pain, surrounded by my groceries and my own teeth. He grabbed my hand and started to bend my finger back, when suddenly he stopped. "Let it be known," he said, "that confuzed does show mercy to his enemies."
I looked up, and sure enough in those brave eyes I could see the ESL poster "confuzed" staring back at me. Somehow I just knew. I realised at that point that everything I'd said online had caught up with me, and I was getting what I deserve.
So confuzed, I sincerely apologise for offending you by writing "Then I hope you know the difference between a documentary and a reality show. The only show like that I know of was called 'English Teachers.' We were discussing it recently. I never knew they did a season on Korea. Not much useful information out there." I'm sorry that I hurt your feelings. Please just don't hurt me again. |
|
| Back to top |
|
 |
Junior
Joined: 18 Nov 2005
Location: the eye
|
| Posted: Sat Apr 14, 2007 3:58 am Post subject: |
|
|
It was a sunny morning when i opened my inbox. In it lay a letter from mindmetoo.
"Meet you outside burger king at 1, I'm tired of your BS".
Then there was this from Manner of speaking.
"I want my 50$ you tw*t. When and where?"
Also, a friendly missive from dear old jinju:
"I'm going to knock you out with my 600mm lens".
SteveMcgarrett had also dropped me a line:
"I AM NOT OBESE. MEET ME OUTSIDE BURGER KING".
I replied to Mr Mcgarrett that I would meet him at 1 and that I look like a korean woman and would be carrying a puppy.I told MOS I would be ready to kill and he would recognise me by the big lens I would be carrying. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
RACETRAITOR
Joined: 24 Oct 2005
Location: Seoul, South Korea
|
| Posted: Sat Apr 14, 2007 4:03 am Post subject: |
|
|
| willneverteachagain wrote: |
ru fuc*ing kidding me?
i wish i was walking with u
do u know this person?
how the hell did he know that u were going to be outside at that time? |
Just so you all know, it didn't happen...yet.
As far as I know, confuzed isn't in country yet. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
MANDRL
Joined: 13 Oct 2006
Location: South Korea
|
| Posted: Sat Apr 14, 2007 4:06 am Post subject: Re: I totally got jumped today |
|
|
| RACETRAITOR wrote: |
So I just popped out to the corner store in Namguro to buy some snacks for my sick wife. There was another foreigner in there, which is unusual in this neighbourhood. He was a mountain of a man, with a look of noble determination splashed on his face like paint on a rennaissance canvass.
I said hi and he grinned knowingly. When I left the store, he came out after me. He followed me around the corner and then slammed me up against the wall. I lost my groceries and he smashed me in the face, again and again. I couldn't protect myself against his savage attack.
I begged him to stop, but he kicked me in the stomach.
I was on the ground in pain, surrounded by my groceries and my own teeth. He grabbed my hand and started to bend my finger back, when suddenly he stopped. "Let it be known," he said, "that confuzed does show mercy to his enemies."
I looked up, and sure enough in those brave eyes I could see the ESL poster "confuzed" staring back at me. Somehow I just knew. I realised at that point that everything I'd said online had caught up with me, and I was getting what I deserve.
So confuzed, I sincerely apologise for offending you by writing "Then I hope you know the difference between a documentary and a reality show. The only show like that I know of was called 'English Teachers.' We were discussing it recently. I never knew they did a season on Korea. Not much useful information out there." I'm sorry that I hurt your feelings. Please just don't hurt me again. |
Did he speed off in his Jaguar? |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
willneverteachagain
Joined: 17 Dec 2006
|
| Posted: Sat Apr 14, 2007 4:07 am Post subject: |
|
|
| surrounded by my own teeth was a nice touch |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
RACETRAITOR
Joined: 24 Oct 2005
Location: Seoul, South Korea
|
| Posted: Sat Apr 14, 2007 4:10 am Post subject: Re: I totally got jumped today |
|
|
| MANDRL wrote: |
Did he speed off in his Jaguar? |
No, his cosa nostra buddies were there to pick him up in a limo. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
twg
Joined: 02 Nov 2006
Location: Getting some fresh air...
|
| Posted: Sat Apr 14, 2007 6:56 am Post subject: |
|
|
Ah man, I actually bought it for a second.  |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
pest2
Joined: 01 Jun 2005
Location: Vancouver, Canada
|
| Posted: Sat Apr 14, 2007 7:52 am Post subject: |
|
|
I believed it. Good job awesome!  |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Wishmaster
Joined: 06 Feb 2003
|
| Posted: Sat Apr 14, 2007 9:00 am Post subject: |
|
|
| Nice-uh! |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Thunndarr
Joined: 30 Sep 2003
|
| Posted: Sat Apr 14, 2007 4:40 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| There is nothing quite as frightening as an e-badass. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
chronicpride
Joined: 16 Jan 2003
|
| Posted: Sat Apr 14, 2007 10:31 pm Post subject: Re: I totally got jumped today |
|
|
| confuzed wrote: |
You just played out your own scenario, of what's going to happen to you when I catch you. The only thing is you won't be back to talk about it. |
That's, hands-down, THE most scariest thing that I've ever read on the...um... internet.
 |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
twg
Joined: 02 Nov 2006
Location: Getting some fresh air...
|
| Posted: Sat Apr 14, 2007 11:17 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| This is the funniest thread here in recent memory |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
RACETRAITOR
Joined: 24 Oct 2005
Location: Seoul, South Korea
|
| Posted: Sat Apr 14, 2007 11:27 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| twg wrote: |
| This is the funniest thread here in recent memory |
Well you should've seen the thread that started it all. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
blynch
Joined: 25 Oct 2006
Location: UCLA
|
| Posted: Sat Apr 14, 2007 11:58 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| RACETRAITOR wrote: |
| twg wrote: |
| This is the funniest thread here in recent memory |
Well you should've seen the thread that started it all. |
We did, stpd (that's how u look)!
nice pic though |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Demophobe
Joined: 17 May 2004
|
| Posted: Sun Apr 15, 2007 1:45 am Post subject: |
|
|
| RACETRAITOR wrote: |
| twg wrote: |
| This is the funniest thread here in recent memory |
Well you should've seen the thread that started it all. |
The actual fear in this one smells much stronger.
While I agree that the internet tough guy is a bit lame, I'm sure there are cases of people making good on the threat, especially when one of the parties involved is easily identified by name, picture, location, hang-outs. One would think the main obstacle to e-badguys is that they can't easily find out where the other guy lives.
The net is a weird place...now way I want all to know who I am, where I live, work, hang out or what I look like even. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
FAQ
Search
Memberlist
Usergroups
Register
Profile
Log in to check your private messages
Log in
