Korean Job Discussion Forums

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I've got a dilemma....

*caution: if you don't like sappy stuff quit reading*

I'm going to Korea this summer, I think to Pusan. I don't want to leave the love of my life behind, and she could get a better job than me in korea with better pay, since she's an education major and has experience working with disabled kids for a few years. I'm fresh out of college.

The problem is.... the furthest she's been away from home is Kentucky. We live in Pittsburgh.

She's also never been on an airplane.


She wants to be convinced, but she's really really scared about being far away, air travel, and she's worried we'll be stuck homeless, jobless, and broke.

I've done the best I can to convince her, but if I can't get her to come with me I'm afraid she's going to go back to her old boyfriend while I'm gone because it's the path of least resistance.

I love this girl more than anything, and she loves me. She's just super scared. Can you guys possibly help me convince her that this is A) good for her, B) not scary, and C) going to be a lot of fun?

I hope I can sway her....

[Scaggs]

You can get meat on a hot rock.

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I'm sure that will help...

[pkang0202]

Here are a few suggestions:

1. Living in Korea can be stressful for those who are used to traveling abroad. That being said, this could put a lot of stress on our girlfriend where she was take it out on you, the person responsible for bringing her here.

2. A big warning sign I read about everything she was worried about. It seems like she's trying to tell you she doesn't want to go at all, but instead of flat out saying it, she's giving you all these reasons hoping you'd get the message.

3. If she gets back with her boyfriend while your gone then it wasn't meant to be. you have to overcome adversity together. If she can't handle you being away and goes to another guy for comfort and companionship then I don't think its a good match.

I'm just writing objectively based on what you wrote. I don't know you or your girlfriend. Please don't take this the wrong way. Honestly, she's scared to come now, I think actually being here will be a tremendous culture shock to her.

Like you said, she's never traveled. Coming to Korea would be like taking someone who can't swim and dropping them off in the middle of the ocean. How is she to Asian culture? Does she like to eat different food besides the local Chinese? How is she around new people?

The main thing you got to understand is that she'll be leaving behind everything she's familiar with and her family and friends. You will be the only support that she has over here. While that may be one way to strengthen your relationship, there is also the very real possibility that her being here will destroy your relationship.

[eamo]

Don't leave the love of your life to come to Korea!!! Are you nuts?!! A lifelong relationship is much more important than teaching monkeys how to say 'how are you?' in the Land of the Morning Jackhammer!!

One would guess you are putting a higher priority on coming to Korea than this girl you call the love of your life. Weird. Korea ain't worth it. Go somewhere later after you get married or something.

[SPINOZA]

[Saxiif]

First off, don't go unless she does. There's nothing in Korea that's worth being away from a good woman for a year.

As for convincing her, there's plenty of wierd stuff in Korea but very little scary stuff. Street crime is almost non-existant, there's plenty of western stuff, etc.

What I'd recommend doing is getting a job in a place that's as urban as possible since there's more western stuff there and it'd be less of a culture shock and start off working at a public school instead of a hagwon since although public schools have their downsides the government isn't going to go bankrupt and or not pay you etc.

As far as airlines go, Korean Air is a pretty good airline, shouldn't have any problems...

[poet13]

Think A-team, Mr T, and airplanes.

Seriously though, for anybody, spending time out of their country can be a fantstic, eye-opening experience. For many people, just the thought of going far from home without a support network is terrifying... but you have a built-in support network already. I think international experience for an educator can only be a good thing. Since being an educator is also about spending your life learning, rather than buliding a more and more outdated static body of knowledge and passing that on; then immersing yourself for a year in a country so different from home can be a wildly accelerated form of self-education and benefit.
I think the attitude with which you approach your experience here will make all the difference. Many people spend a year or more here and aside from a few dollars saved, have a non-experience. Others come here, and have goals, however vague. Maybe learn some of the language. Learn an art, whether martial or musical, it doesn't matter. Just do soemthing.
Above all, do some research first. Get an idea of what to expect before you get off the plane.
I hope that helps a little.

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Addendum:


She wants me to go. And she wants to come. She just needs to be convinced a little bit more.


The situation is a bit more complicated than I am laying out for you, so understand that the responses about me having already made the decision to leave her, that she doesn't really love me because of her old boyfriend, and that she really doesn't want to come don't really apply.

Thanks for all the advice though, what I really need are some practical pointers to help me with my ability to lay her fears to rest.


EDIT: I'm having her make a list of the things she's scared of.

[Scouse Mouse]

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[RACETRAITOR]

Not everyone is cut out for Korea, just to warn you.

[jdog2050]

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[jdog2050]