Korean Job Discussion Forums

[Captain Corea]

[fiveeagles]

We had our son in S.Korea and what an ordeal! My wife isn't Korean so we probably did all right. Fortunately, we had an excellent doctor and though I highlight some of the negatives they did a great job overall.

35 hours later and they decided to give my wife a c-section. Throughout the pregnancy the head nurse continued to put on the heat for our room, telling us that the room should be over 30 Celsius. We had a constant war to keep my wife from fainting from the heat.

Once the baby was born, they put him in a bubble container and wouldn't let me hold him. After my wife was feeling better we made sure that the baby stayed with us in our room. It was only allowed to stay with us in our room, because we requested it before. All the Koreans were confused that we had the baby in our room and that we were breast feeding it.

I talked to one of the dads on the floor and he hadn't even held his baby yet and that was 4 days after the delivery. They usually keep all the babies in this glass room until they feel that they are immunized. After, the grandmother usually comes to the house to live for a few months. This guy was telling me that after a few months he could hold his baby. They also have a lot of funny traditions.

A few of my buddies that had Korean wives had babies too. Pretty funny to see.

A few pointers,

1. Make sure your baby stays in your room with you,
2. Breast feed that baby right away,
3. Hold your baby right away and connect with it, don't let them steal those awesome first times.
4. Take the heating control away from the nurses. ha
5. Learn to say, manjijima Don't touch!

Hope this helps.

[Newbie]

[Newbie]

[uberscheisse]

[Homer]

When your wife delivers a baby my man...she can do whatever she feels like doing....including staying in a post-delivery hospital...

She gave birth.....thats a free pass to whatever she wants when it comes to recovering....

[EFLtrainer]

Sheesh... even on this board and on this sort of thread, people get nasty and just plain dumb.

Let me point out that differing views are OK. That differing beliefs are OK. However, telling someone how their marriage *should* be run is NOT OK.

Personally, I go with the science over the old wives tales... but I listen to the old wives tales and try to find any wisdom in them. Further, if they do no harm, but make my wife or in-laws happy, why not? Still, as an example, no way in heck is anyone taking my kid away from me for a month. Non-starter. Full stop. don't even think about it. Especially when the argument is that Koreans - all 70 M of them - are so drastically different from the other 6.5 billion people on the planet...

[Wrench]

Take it from me its important to build the mother-child BOND ASAP as soon as the baby is born it should be held in the mothers arms. If this doesn't occur you can cause detrimental damage to the parent child relationship. I think these traditions are outlived, Korea had a horible infant mortality rate and they adopted these traditions to protect the new borns but they were meant for the bloody dark ages when hygene was non existant and bathing was a problem. Now these traditions are plain "stupid" sorry. North America has a very low infant mortality rate and they don't have silly 300 year old traditions about birth and afterbirth care.

BREAST feeding is important WHY? Because mothers milk contains high levels of anti-bodies. Since child recieves no antibodies while still in the womb the childs imune system can be easily comprimised. This is why hospitals in the west will feed the baby donated breast milk if the mother can't lactate. Its also high in fats which the baby needs for proper development. Damn any hick on a cow farm could tell you this.

The heat its because heat kills bacteria, they are inducing a fake fever which should technicaly sterilize. Problem is that we don't live in the dark ages or Korea prior to 20th century. With current medicine it shouldn't be a problem plus women after birth have a raised imune system which will handle most bugs by itself and propigate those defences to the infant via breast milk. Remember they were writing silly hanjia on the bottom of your feet as medicine in Korea only 50-80 years ago.

This is just a plain head up your arse traditions that have no merit or value.

[polonius]

Well my wife and I will be having our first in Korea. She is due in November. I have already taking certain tasks away from her. I don't want her to stress out in the early stages. So, cleaning and cooking is done minimally by her. I try to do as much as I can, but the rest, I hire a lady to come in and clean, dust, and little odds and ends.

we are both Canadian, and will have the child here. So, we will be implementing certain rules that must happen. I have heard that fathers are not allowed in the rooms. I won't miss one of the most special moments in my life. I understand that if it needs go to c-section, then things will be different. Our baby WILL be in our arms asap. Initial contact with mother/father will last a lifetime.

I Am working my tail off now, so that when the time comes, I can slow my schedule down, and take the needed time off, so that I can be there for my wife. My mom will also make the trip out, to offer an extra hand around the house.

I guess the bottom line is, we will be doing it the way we think is best. Obviously, we will listen to what doctors have to say, but in the end it will be our choice. And these are the decisions we are currently hashing out with our doctor.

Best of luck to all the new families! My wife and I wish you the best in health and safety.

[Newbie]

[steroidmaximus]

So many doctors on here, giving their expert advice. Here's mine:

There's a difference between what is actually needed and what is customary. What is needed is for the mom to take the time she feels she needs to get back on her feet, and to ensure that no complications can occur. She needs fresh air and needs to get up and move around after a few days.

What is customary in Korean maternal clinics is the opposite of this. I don't understand how lying around for a month in a stiffling room benefits either mother or child.

Having been to two maternity hospitals, what I saw were some mothers definitely milking it, while others were in and out.

The first hospital we went to, the nurses let me hold my first almost immediately after she was born. That moment is one of the brightest spots in my life, and I'll never forget it. The second hospital had a rather draconian bitch for a head nurse who didn't want to let me any where near my second. I checked with the doctor, and my second was healthy with no complications or problems. So I went back to hold my new baby. Needless to say, draconian head bitch lost that discussion, and I didn't see her the rest of the time my wife stayed there. I can only hope she was fired. She didn't understand the bonding thing, and was working with an outdated set of assumptions, which do seem to still be popular with the general populace.

As an appeal to authority, a group of older nurses I teach also think the one month secluded in the hospital thing is unnecessary and in fact may cause more harm than good; is from the past, and not necessary in the modern world.

[Pak Yu Man]

[Captain Corea]

Mine is due in late June... I'm a little worried about the heat.

I'm not a fan of AC and would rather have some nice natural breeze flowing through our place.

[Corporal]

[EFLtrainer]

None of you folks can recommend a doctor?