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princess
Joined: 16 Jan 2003
Location: soul of Asia
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 Posted: Mon May 14, 2007 10:32 pm Post subject: |
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| Yes, sometimes it is insulting. It's not a stranger's business how old I am. Recently, a guy told me his age and when I told him I am the same age as him, he said "Really"? What? Do I look 100 years old or someting? I guess I just "have" to be older than him, huh? Some people are so rude and can't stand if another person is not older. So what??? |
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princess
Joined: 16 Jan 2003
Location: soul of Asia
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| Posted: Mon May 14, 2007 10:37 pm Post subject: |
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| jinks wrote: |
It used to annoy the living cr@p out of me, but now I just let it go. I tell people I am 74 (Western age), if they persist with age questions I tell them that I am 28 (Korean age).
I am actually 44, but I am so much more than a number. |
But surely you have 28 year old Koreans asking you, "Really, you are 28"? A foreigner just can't get ahead of a Korean sometimes. They will be oh so jealous! |
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Rapacious Mr. Batstove
Joined: 26 Jan 2007
Location: Central Areola
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| Posted: Mon May 14, 2007 10:40 pm Post subject: |
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The age question really doesn't bother me. Why should it? I was 22 when I arrived here the first time, I don't recall that many people asking me my age.
One question I don't like being asked by Koreans is "Are you good at drinking" and "How many bottles of soju can you drink"
I usually answer depending on how much they size me up before they ask. I answer 'half a glass' to co workers so they think I'm a *beep* before I drink them under the table. And 'more than you' to friends of my Korean friends who I just know want to challenge the foreigner to a drink off. |
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Kyrei
Joined: 22 Jan 2003
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| Posted: Mon May 14, 2007 11:05 pm Post subject: |
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| I don't understand why so many of you are bent out of shape over this question? It is a cultural norm here to ask someone their age for linguistic and other referential purposes. Just because it is not common in our culture doesn't mean it is rude. It would be rude in the West but, get it through your skulls, here it is not rude. If you think it is rude then the problem is yours to overcome, not this culture's. If you still think it is rude and it bothers you after you have been here more than a couple of months then you would be better served to think of a different culture with whcih to try and fit in. |
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Dev
Joined: 18 Apr 2006
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| Posted: Mon May 14, 2007 11:40 pm Post subject: |
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| Kyrei wrote: |
| I don't understand why so many of you are bent out of shape over this question? It is a cultural norm here to ask someone their age for linguistic and other referential purposes. Just because it is not common in our culture doesn't mean it is rude. It would be rude in the West but, get it through your skulls, here it is not rude. If you think it is rude then the problem is yours to overcome, not this culture's. If you still think it is rude and it bothers you after you have been here more than a couple of months then you would be better served to think of a different culture with whcih to try and fit in. |
It is rude because we are guests in this country. Do you ask questions that may offend your guests?
A buddy of mine had dinner with his supevisor and a female western English teacher. The Korean boss asked her "Are you a virgin?"
Now, one could argue that this question is not offensive based on the fact that many Koreans are devout Christians, but the fact is here is another question that can offend a guest in Korea.
Many Koreans seem to just fire away questions without considering the feelings of foreigners. There's a definite lack of cultural sensitivity in this country. |
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twg
Joined: 02 Nov 2006
Location: Getting some fresh air...
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| Posted: Tue May 15, 2007 12:20 am Post subject: |
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It doesn't bother me at all.
The follow up, "You should be married with children now! What's wrong with you?" does. |
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Zyzyfer
Joined: 29 Jan 2003
Location: who, what, where, when, why, how?
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| Posted: Tue May 15, 2007 12:26 am Post subject: |
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| Dev wrote: |
| Is this question insulting to you? |
No. But I'm normal.
| IncognitoHFX wrote: |
| Do you think my age will be a problem? I'm not that young (twenty-two), but when I was recruited I remember my interviewer being like "holy *beep* you're young!" |
I was 21 when I was recruited and even when I got here (for about a week). 22 is young because you're essentially coming here straight out of uni, so that might surprise a recruiter or something, but there are plenty of young people and slightly older people who act like they're young over here. |
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princess
Joined: 16 Jan 2003
Location: soul of Asia
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| Posted: Tue May 15, 2007 12:41 am Post subject: |
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| twg wrote: |
It doesn't bother me at all.
The follow up, "You should be married with children now! What's wrong with you?" does. |
My Korean friend is 34 years old and works in a restaurant at the Intercontinental Hotel in Samseong-dong. She gets asked by some of her customers why she isn't married and does she have some sort of mental problem or something. Terrible people.  |
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Alyallen
Joined: 29 Mar 2004
Location: The 4th Greatest Place on Earth = Jeonju!!!
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| Posted: Tue May 15, 2007 12:51 am Post subject: |
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| twg wrote: |
It doesn't bother me at all.
The follow up, "You should be married with children now! What's wrong with you?" does. |
Exactly! That annoys the *beep* out of me...
That and for some reason I really hate "Do you miss your family?" or "Will you marry your boyfriend" ESPECIALLY when its from my elementary school students.
Why should I bend over backwards for their culture when they don't follow their own rules for us?....Oh...Because we are non-people. Good to know... |
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billyJO
Joined: 13 May 2007
Location: Qatar
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| Posted: Tue May 15, 2007 1:09 am Post subject: ages does matter |
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hi...all
i am surprise the way people think as far as AGE is concerned in korea..but yes i agree to all the comments and views in here, one thing some of you don't know is when they fall in love, age does'nt matter, don't argue with me.... i'm a living proof...ha ha ha |
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princess
Joined: 16 Jan 2003
Location: soul of Asia
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| Posted: Tue May 15, 2007 1:16 am Post subject: Re: ages does matter |
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| billyJO wrote: |
hi...all
i am surprise the way people think as far as AGE is concerned in korea..but yes i agree to all the comments and views in here, one thing some of you don't know is when they fall in love, age does'nt matter, don't argue with me.... i'm a living proof...ha ha ha |
Really? So a Korean man would date a gal 8 years older than him if she is still hot??? |
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esetters21
Joined: 30 Apr 2006
Location: Seoul
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| Posted: Tue May 15, 2007 1:45 am Post subject: |
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| Wow! Nobody has ever asked me that question. I'm a little impatient and skip posts. What is the point here? |
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sojourner1
Joined: 17 Apr 2007
Location: Where meggi swim and 2 wheeled tractors go sput put chug alugg pug pug
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| Posted: Tue May 15, 2007 1:57 am Post subject: |
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Yes, the Confucian ideology is that your friends must be the same age as you, regardless of social status. So people ask each other how old each other are since this is the main criteria for possibly initiating a friendship, albiet, a terrible 1st criteria in my opinion. It is assumed that if you're in your 30's or older that you have a wife and kids which makes you look strange or peculiar if you do not. The older you are, the more you are percieved to have social status and wealth, thus, instantly commanding more respect if your showing age. This antiquated model of judging people is inaccurate in todays world, unlike in the stone ages where you automatically fell in place and stayed there in the same village or community. For example, you might be 35 years old today, but earned $60,000 a year 10 years ago in a dot.com company, but you might only earn $30,000 today teaching English, so you are not as high status as you were in your young days. This sort of thing never happened in the stone ages. Your status and wealth gradually increased as you came of age and a set back would most likely only be caused from a war, not you being an individual in a global market economy where you get older, but financially poorer with each passing day.
This age thing is a fundamental aspect of how Confucianism works on the individual level. As we all know, the modern changes that have come about defy traditional values.
It has nothing to do with desiring only young people to teach. No worries there as I have seen many guys in thier 40's, 50's, and 60's that are English teachers in Korea.
Don't get me started on cold rude comments of losing and gaining weight and comments like your pale faced or your level of hansomness is decreasing. Give me a break. It can get silly.
Oh, crud, I hope it is not time to get a can of Troll killer spray out. LMAO! |
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RACETRAITOR
Joined: 24 Oct 2005
Location: Seoul, South Korea
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| Posted: Tue May 15, 2007 2:09 am Post subject: |
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| Kyrei wrote: |
| I don't understand why so many of you are bent out of shape over this question? It is a cultural norm here to ask someone their age for linguistic and other referential purposes. Just because it is not common in our culture doesn't mean it is rude. It would be rude in the West but, get it through your skulls, here it is not rude. If you think it is rude then the problem is yours to overcome, not this culture's. If you still think it is rude and it bothers you after you have been here more than a couple of months then you would be better served to think of a different culture with whcih to try and fit in. |
God, Kyrei, you're so thick sometimes.
It's rude because it shows they aren't aware this isn't a polite question in other countries. They should be expected to confirm to our standards of courtesy, and a big F-U to anyone who disagrees. I'm tired of losers being rude.
(just kidding) |
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Bigs
Joined: 15 Oct 2006
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| Posted: Tue May 15, 2007 2:27 am Post subject: |
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I'm 23 as well.
Luckily (?), I'm fat, so I get the "Teacher why you fat?" in lieu of "How old are you?"  |
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