Korean Job Discussion Forums

rapier · Joined: 16 Feb 2003

I'm so over knowing Korean men socially, or as friends. I generally avoid as much contact as possible with any Korean male.They are a lot of boorish pigs, some of the saddest life forms I've seen on the planet so far.
Ultimately, with greater openness to the world at large, and an increasing cosmopolitain atmosphere in korea, the only way Korean men will be able to hold onto their women is by changing their behavior, and it won't be a moment too soon.

Plastic B · Joined: 15 Aug 2003 Location: Daejeon no more

I'm sitting here as I write this with a bashed in face which I copped as a result of stepping in when a waygook saram scum threw his Korean girlfriend down the stairs at a popular expat bar here in Daejeon.

He has been charged with assaulting me, after I spent 5 hours in two police stations on Saturday. His (ahem) girlfriend, walking with a limp and cluching her back in pain in the police station denies that he threw her down the stairs, but admits it was him who assaulted me. She apologised to me, not for him, but for herself BECAUSE IT WAS ALL HER FAULT THAT THIS PIECE OF DIRT THREW HER DOWN THE STAIRS!!!

Now, I've lost a couple of days wages and over a hundred thou in medical expenses, not to mention a lost weekend with a good friend who had travelled up from Busan to spend time together ~ yeah, great weekend.

My dilemma is : do I proceed with the charges, have the scumbag found guilty ~ a dead certainty as there were witnesses who will back me up ~ have him deported and lose his job as a result,

or : take the Korean route have him pay me damages and leave him here to throw more girls down stairwells.

Either way, this idiot has to undergo some form of anger management as he is already renowned for violent attacks on other foreigners here in Daejeon.

Kiddirts · Joined: 25 Jul 2003

Tancred · Posted: Mon Oct 13, 2003 4:51 am Post subject:

Okay everyone...step aside, here comes the voice of reason...i'll lay it all out simply for you so we can put an end to this tomfoolery...

Plastic B: Have the scumbag pay damages to you and let the girl leave him if she wants...or not if she doesn't want to. I'm all for women's rights and what not but women are not helpless morons who need to be saved all the time. If she's not going to leave him, let her stay and get beaten up. What do you care? It's her perogative. Kudos for stepping in though.

rapier: Man, you've got a lot of angst built up...how long have you taught here, by the way...(i just want to know so i can make sure i'm out well before then... Wink

)

Butterfly: Wins the vote for the best avatar.

Kiwiboy: Generally right in commending the OP. I mean, better to do something than nothing. It's usually a bit of a shock when something like that happens, and i for one don't really know how i'd react. It does take some people a little time to assess the situation and figure out all the angels...i mean angles...Also, I think the OP is correct in condemning the Koreans for not stepping up to the plate. It's their playground...they should be the ones checking their own rules. It's usually advised for foreigners not to get involved in ANY altercations in any country. It's complicated and messy and let's face it...the guy probably beats his wife or girlfriend fairly consistently at home all the time...you aren't going to save the day by busting up one beating.

Luckily i've never been in that situation, but I, for one, doubt i'd risk getting involved. It just isn't worth it...heroes don't necessarily have happy endings in cases like that. I can empathize, and i might shout at the guy but i really don't think i'd do anything.

Austin: Has a few good points...he actually makes oodles of sense, and i suspect has been delving deep into the Buddhist schtick while he's been here what with his "All life is suffering" mantra.

On the Other Hand: Makes logical sense but i think is also being a tad pedantic with his advice. I mean, it's easy to isolate certain words and say that, well, if she was being dragged through the street, choked, etc. than you should have known that it was serious and should have reacted appropriately and immediately. But really all of that could have happened in a space of a few seconds, and i'm sure we all know that it takes the average person a little time to come to terms with a situation before they can react...it does me anyway. Anywho, it's good to have a Devil's Advocate.

Gord: Point in this thread is too attenuated to hold water in my opinion. Again, it's always good to have a contrarian aboard but I think slamming the OP (kiddirts, i think) for castigating the surrounding Koreans is a bit misplaced. I mean, it would infuriate me too if I saw none of this woman's fellow countrymen coming to her aid, and it was basically left up to me to intervene if I wanted the beating to stop. But again, Gord keeps one in check and makes sure certain people don't get too heady with their ego and self-aggrandizement.

As for the OP: Well done sir...'tis a sticky situation, and it seems that you performed admirably. Not something i would've done but it's good to know that people still care.

In short...everybody wins!!! You're all big winners tonight!!! Yay!!! Give yourselves a pat on the back!

Coffeecup · Joined: 30 Jun 2003

Tancred

matthewwoodford · Joined: 01 Oct 2003 Location: Location, location, location.

the_beaver · Joined: 15 Jan 2003

Pyongshin Sangja · Joined: 20 Apr 2003 Location: I love baby!

Was this at J-rock in Daejon? I was there on Saturday night, didn't see anything out of the ordinary.

Seoultrader · Joined: 18 Jun 2003 Location: Ali's Insurgent Inn, Fallujah

Butterfly · Joined: 02 Mar 2003 Location: Kuwait

Gord · Joined: 25 Feb 2003

ratslash · Joined: 08 May 2003

it is a horrible country when it comes down to sexual discrimination. it is like being back in england in the 60's or 70's.

my friend's girlfriend's sister got beaten up by her ex-boyfriend the other night. fat lap and some bruises on her face. some of the guys in this country are sick.

Plastic B · Joined: 15 Aug 2003 Location: Daejeon no more

Thanks for all the support and advice. It was not at J-Rock as Pyongshin Sangja asked, and it was Friday night/Saturday morning at my local The Zoo Bar. I wouldn't normally have named the bar posting here, but Togun, the owner, told me the bar was closing on the 31st of October, which is sad, coz I love the Zoo, it's not the bar's fault...

I am told that I can actually have my cake and eat it too over this action, being that the guy who assaulted me must pay for all my medical expenses and lost time at work, and still be found guilty of assault and deported. This may be the best course of action, although I have been told by a couple of people that he intends to leave in February anyway.

If he gets deported, does that mean he cannot come back again? For how long?

Thanks to Seoultrader for the PM, let me assure you, that if it comes down to reconciliation I am going for way more than 1.5 million. I have already lost 2 days work, maybe more, as my face is totally blackened and I don't want to scare my kiddies...erm, any more than I already do, that is!

Austin · Joined: 23 May 2003 Location: In the kitchen

It is disconcerting to read that so many think that getting involved in other people's affairs is a good policy. After all, you only witnessed a moment in time, and you do not know anything of their history.

How can a person get involved with complete strangers, claiming that they care about one of the people in the confrontation, without any understanding or appreciation for what their involvement is going to actually do?

Far too often, I see strangers become involved out of some ego-flex of their own, like they were out with their girlfriend and wanted to impress her or be portrayed as some sort of hero. Unfortunately, ration and reason have been thrown out the window on this thread, so I doubt an appreciation for minding one's own business will ever be had my many here.

Confrontation is not a way to remedy a confrontation, because it only creates another confrontation! More violence is not a solution to violence. A "calming down" of a situation is not achieved by getting in a person's face, after something has happened. The bruises on that one guy's face can be added proof to dispel that belief.

What was the end result of such shortsighted "noble" action? A guy with a bruised face that can not teach his students (if he is a "good" teacher his students are now suffering due to his absence). The other guy is going to have to spend some of his disposable income (that he might have spent on his girlfriend or other needed things) to cover the one guy's medical bills, which is only going to prolong the negative emotions and the after-effects of that infamous "night" on the town. The police are now occupied with dealing with that situation, when they could be doing something else. The same can be said for the legal system, etc.

Were those actions really helpful and for the greater good of everyone?