|
Korean Job Discussion Forums
"The Internet's Meeting Place for ESL/EFL Teachers from Around the World!"
|
| View previous topic :: View next topic |
| Author |
Message |
jaganath69
Joined: 17 Jul 2003
|
 Posted: Sun Aug 05, 2007 2:15 am Post subject: Domestic Abuse |
 |
|
In the apartment two floors above me lives a man with a Vietnamese wife. She is clearly suffering from a mental illness, as I see her outside talking to herself, visibly cursing and she often wanders the neighborhood in a distressed and disoriented state. Often late at night we can hear her yelling and screaming by herself, obviously she is not in a good way.
My wife has witnessed her husband, an older Korean man, striking her. He did this in the forecourt of our apartment complex a week or so ago. Tonight I was standing on the patio having a smoke and he was trying to coerce her onto the back of his moped. She seemed reluctant to go and stood there sulking. He made to hit her but saw me and stopped. She ran upstairs.
I know, after being here for four years that getting involved in these situations will not help and can often end with the person trying to stop it getting locked up. However, I don't know if I can watch this b@stard assault his wife again. Rationalising it reeks of the worst kind of cultural relativism and seeing a mentally ill woman tormented in this fashion makes me want to drive my fist into the old c#nt's nose and teach him a thing or two about power (I'm 6'8", he's about 5'5"). At any rate, I wish something could be done for her. This is one sick country indeed. |
|
| Back to top |
|
 |
butlerian
Joined: 04 Sep 2006
Location: Korea
|
| Posted: Sun Aug 05, 2007 2:24 am Post subject: Re: Domestic Abuse |
|
|
| jaganath69 wrote: |
| This is one sick country indeed. |
Another attempt at Korea-bashing? That comment is completely out of order. Domestic violence is a serious problem in many countries across the world, including the UK and North America. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
wo buxihuan hanguoren
Joined: 18 Apr 2007
Location: Suyuskis
|
| Posted: Sun Aug 05, 2007 2:26 am Post subject: Re: Domestic Abuse |
|
|
| butlerian wrote: |
| jaganath69 wrote: |
| This is one sick country indeed. |
Another attempt at Korea-bashing? That comment is completely out of order. Domestic violence is a serious problem in many countries across the world, including the UK and North America. |
Uh, I know jaganath personally, he is one of the most rational and reasonable guys that I have met here.
How long have you been here? Can you even speak Korean? |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
butlerian
Joined: 04 Sep 2006
Location: Korea
|
| Posted: Sun Aug 05, 2007 2:29 am Post subject: Re: Domestic Abuse |
|
|
| wo buxihuan hanguoren wrote: |
| butlerian wrote: |
| jaganath69 wrote: |
| This is one sick country indeed. |
Another attempt at Korea-bashing? That comment is completely out of order. Domestic violence is a serious problem in many countries across the world, including the UK and North America. |
Uh, I know jaganath personally, he is one of the most rational and reasonable guys that I have met here.
How long have you been here? Can you even speak Korean? |
Excuse me? What has that got to do with the issue in question? I've been here almost 2 years and I speak enough Korean to get around. I certainly study regularly and do my best to promote my understanding of the Korean language and culture. But, so what? |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Yesterday
Joined: 15 Aug 2003
Location: Land of the Morning DongChim (Kancho)
|
| Posted: Sun Aug 05, 2007 2:30 am Post subject: Re: Domestic Abuse |
|
|
| butlerian wrote: |
| jaganath69 wrote: |
| This is one sick country indeed. |
Another attempt at Korea-bashing? That comment is completely out of order. Domestic violence is a serious problem in many countries across the world, including the UK and North America. |
You've been here one year and already you want to be an apologist.. and say - wait - the same thing happens in the UK. the USA etc...
sure - but in those countries - a social worker would be standing on their doorstep on MONDAY....
here - the poor Vietnamese lady has no avenues to turn to for help....
geez... I know the OP cannot help here without getting into trouble him/herself... but there must be some type of help/advice to give her.... |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
wo buxihuan hanguoren
Joined: 18 Apr 2007
Location: Suyuskis
|
| Posted: Sun Aug 05, 2007 2:32 am Post subject: Re: Domestic Abuse |
|
|
| butlerian wrote: |
| wo buxihuan hanguoren wrote: |
| butlerian wrote: |
| jaganath69 wrote: |
| This is one sick country indeed. |
Another attempt at Korea-bashing? That comment is completely out of order. Domestic violence is a serious problem in many countries across the world, including the UK and North America. |
Uh, I know jaganath personally, he is one of the most rational and reasonable guys that I have met here.
How long have you been here? Can you even speak Korean? |
Excuse me? What has that got to do with the issue in question? I've been here almost 2 years and I speak enough Korean to get around. I certainly study regularly and do my best to promote my understanding of the Korean language and culture. But, so what? |
The "issue" in question has to do with a Korean guy abusing his bought wife, which is such a serious issue here that the Vietnamese government even "issues" warnings to its citizens about marrying a Korean.
Do the governments in the UK and North America "issue" similar warnings? Do they teach their citizens how to say "Please don't hit me" in Korean, too?
Please enlighten me, smart guy. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
JMO
Joined: 18 Jul 2006
Location: Daegu
|
| Posted: Sun Aug 05, 2007 2:34 am Post subject: |
|
|
| Try calling the cops maybe? Failing that try to put the fear of god into him? Your 6'8 so it shouldn't be a problem.. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
butlerian
Joined: 04 Sep 2006
Location: Korea
|
| Posted: Sun Aug 05, 2007 2:37 am Post subject: Re: Domestic Abuse |
|
|
| wo buxihuan hanguoren wrote: |
| butlerian wrote: |
| wo buxihuan hanguoren wrote: |
| butlerian wrote: |
| jaganath69 wrote: |
| This is one sick country indeed. |
Another attempt at Korea-bashing? That comment is completely out of order. Domestic violence is a serious problem in many countries across the world, including the UK and North America. |
Uh, I know jaganath personally, he is one of the most rational and reasonable guys that I have met here.
How long have you been here? Can you even speak Korean? |
Excuse me? What has that got to do with the issue in question? I've been here almost 2 years and I speak enough Korean to get around. I certainly study regularly and do my best to promote my understanding of the Korean language and culture. But, so what? |
The "issue" in question has to do with a Korean guy abusing his bought wife, which is such a serious issue here that the Vietnamese government even "issues" warnings to its citizens about marrying a Korean.
Do the governments in the UK and North America "issue" similar warnings? Do they teach their citizens how to say "Please don't hit me" in Korean, too?
Please enlighten me, smart guy. |
That was not the "issue" that you addressed in your initial reply to me. There is no need for silly remarks like "smart guy".
Anyway...the important thing is that this victim of domestic violence is helepd, and so I'm not going to waste my time answering any more of your irrelevant questions such as "How long have you been here?". It's time for those who can help to contribute. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
the eye
Joined: 29 Jan 2004
|
| Posted: Sun Aug 05, 2007 2:39 am Post subject: Re: Domestic Abuse |
|
|
| butlerian wrote: |
| Excuse me? What has that got to do with the issue in question? I've been here almost 2 years and I speak enough Korean to get around. I certainly study regularly and do my best to promote my understanding of the Korean language and culture. But, so what? |
If you were so learned, you would realize that domestic abuse is tolerated and/or ignored by society and the law here.
It may happen back home, but people tend not to look the other way.
I believe that is where the perceived 'bashing' comment came from. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
jaganath69
Joined: 17 Jul 2003
|
| Posted: Sun Aug 05, 2007 2:41 am Post subject: Re: Domestic Abuse |
|
|
| butlerian wrote: |
| jaganath69 wrote: |
| This is one sick country indeed. |
Another attempt at Korea-bashing? That comment is completely out of order. Domestic violence is a serious problem in many countries across the world, including the UK and North America. |
You've been here two years yet don't understand how these cases work. Let me spell it out for you since I have friends who got involved in this way.
You call the cops.
Cops turn up.
Cops confer with Korean husband.
Cops brush it off and go away.
Rinse and repeat as necessary.
Now then, a friend of mine is a police sergeant back home in Australia. He spent a lot of time patrolling a blue-collar area on the northern fringes of my hometown. When domestic violence is called in, the police usually respond, take the abused partner away to a safe place with counseling available and then follow up to ensure it isn't happening again should the couple reconcile. Domestic violence orders, like restraining orders are also enforceable. I see none of that here. You might have also heard of that old Korean proverb, "women and dried fish should be beaten twice a week". Now I don't think for a minute that all Korean men, or even a substantial plurality do this, but you'd have to admit the way that domestic abuse is condoned and swept under the carpet is pretty sick. Or do you think that bashing women is no big thing? |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
wo buxihuan hanguoren
Joined: 18 Apr 2007
Location: Suyuskis
|
| Posted: Sun Aug 05, 2007 2:42 am Post subject: Re: Domestic Abuse |
|
|
| butlerian wrote: |
| wo buxihuan hanguoren wrote: |
| butlerian wrote: |
| wo buxihuan hanguoren wrote: |
| butlerian wrote: |
| jaganath69 wrote: |
| This is one sick country indeed. |
Another attempt at Korea-bashing? That comment is completely out of order. Domestic violence is a serious problem in many countries across the world, including the UK and North America. |
Uh, I know jaganath personally, he is one of the most rational and reasonable guys that I have met here.
How long have you been here? Can you even speak Korean? |
Excuse me? What has that got to do with the issue in question? I've been here almost 2 years and I speak enough Korean to get around. I certainly study regularly and do my best to promote my understanding of the Korean language and culture. But, so what? |
The "issue" in question has to do with a Korean guy abusing his bought wife, which is such a serious issue here that the Vietnamese government even "issues" warnings to its citizens about marrying a Korean.
Do the governments in the UK and North America "issue" similar warnings? Do they teach their citizens how to say "Please don't hit me" in Korean, too?
Please enlighten me, smart guy. |
That was not the "issue" that you addressed in your initial reply to me. There is no need for silly remarks like "smart guy".
Anyway...the important thing is that this victim of domestic violence is helepd, and so I'm not going to waste my time answering any more of your irrelevant questions such as "How long have you been here?". It's time for those who can help to contribute. |
No, I've read previous posts that you've written. You seem to be unable to criticize, and instead redirect and compare everything to 'back home'.
I've met your kind before though, let me guess, Korea provided you with your first girlfriend and a place to stay besides mumsy's basement? |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
butlerian
Joined: 04 Sep 2006
Location: Korea
|
| Posted: Sun Aug 05, 2007 2:45 am Post subject: Re: Domestic Abuse |
|
|
| wo buxihuan hanguoren wrote: |
| butlerian wrote: |
| wo buxihuan hanguoren wrote: |
| butlerian wrote: |
| wo buxihuan hanguoren wrote: |
| butlerian wrote: |
| jaganath69 wrote: |
| This is one sick country indeed. |
Another attempt at Korea-bashing? That comment is completely out of order. Domestic violence is a serious problem in many countries across the world, including the UK and North America. |
Uh, I know jaganath personally, he is one of the most rational and reasonable guys that I have met here.
How long have you been here? Can you even speak Korean? |
Excuse me? What has that got to do with the issue in question? I've been here almost 2 years and I speak enough Korean to get around. I certainly study regularly and do my best to promote my understanding of the Korean language and culture. But, so what? |
The "issue" in question has to do with a Korean guy abusing his bought wife, which is such a serious issue here that the Vietnamese government even "issues" warnings to its citizens about marrying a Korean.
Do the governments in the UK and North America "issue" similar warnings? Do they teach their citizens how to say "Please don't hit me" in Korean, too?
Please enlighten me, smart guy. |
That was not the "issue" that you addressed in your initial reply to me. There is no need for silly remarks like "smart guy".
Anyway...the important thing is that this victim of domestic violence is helepd, and so I'm not going to waste my time answering any more of your irrelevant questions such as "How long have you been here?". It's time for those who can help to contribute. |
No, I've read previous posts that you've written. You seem to be unable to criticize, and instead redirect and compare everything to 'back home'.
I've met your kind before though, let me guess, Korea provided you with your first girlfriend and a place to stay besides mumsy's basement? |
Don't pretend to know me - you clearly don't. Of course I am able to criticise, but it is important to put things into perspective. I am well-qualified in Law and in teaching and so I can assure you that I am not here merely because I have to be. If anything, your posts reflect more on that idea, which may in fact be true since it was your creation in the first place. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
butlerian
Joined: 04 Sep 2006
Location: Korea
|
| Posted: Sun Aug 05, 2007 2:47 am Post subject: Re: Domestic Abuse |
|
|
| jaganath69 wrote: |
| butlerian wrote: |
| jaganath69 wrote: |
| This is one sick country indeed. |
Another attempt at Korea-bashing? That comment is completely out of order. Domestic violence is a serious problem in many countries across the world, including the UK and North America. |
You've been here two years yet don't understand how these cases work. Let me spell it out for you since I have friends who got involved in this way.
You call the cops.
Cops turn up.
Cops confer with Korean husband.
Cops brush it off and go away.
Rinse and repeat as necessary.
Now then, a friend of mine is a police sergeant back home in Australia. He spent a lot of time patrolling a blue-collar area on the northern fringes of my hometown. When domestic violence is called in, the police usually respond, take the abused partner away to a safe place with counseling available and then follow up to ensure it isn't happening again should the couple reconcile. Domestic violence orders, like restraining orders are also enforceable. I see none of that here. You might have also heard of that old Korean proverb, "women and dried fish should be beaten twice a week". Now I don't think for a minute that all Korean men, or even a substantial plurality do this, but you'd have to admit the way that domestic abuse is condoned and swept under the carpet is pretty sick. Or do you think that bashing women is no big thing? |
Jaganath - I can see that your motives are genuine, and so I apologise if I over-simplified the issue. But it was not unnatural for me to react if someone calls the whole country "sick" because of one issue, and so I hope that you can see my side too. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
jaganath69
Joined: 17 Jul 2003
|
| Posted: Sun Aug 05, 2007 2:50 am Post subject: |
|
|
| I'm not down on you man, but I think a country where the abuse of women is largely ignored needs a serious wake up call. Maybe it is a bit personal with me since my cousin was used as a punching bag by her partner for years and was only stopped when his new girlfriend stabbed him to death with a kitchen knife. Maybe a bit of an overstatement on my behalf, and no offense taken. I can see where you are coming from, but I'm still pretty f#ckin angry since there are people in the complex better positioned to help this woman yet they don't do a thing. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
dutchy pink
Joined: 06 Feb 2007
Location: Incheon
|
| Posted: Sun Aug 05, 2007 3:00 am Post subject: |
|
|
If you are concerned, FCCCCCk what every two bit tom and harry says.
Would you prefer to listen to what us losers say after the fact, or do something.
I f you are concerned with somebody's safety you know what to do.
Korea or otherwise. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
|
|
FAQ
Search
Memberlist
Usergroups
Register
Profile
Log in to check your private messages
Log in
