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Interracial dating/marriage in Korea
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Based on your personal experience, which of the following is most accurate?

Western men date Korean women significantly more often

78%

[ 56 ]

Western men date Korean women slightly more often

[ 5 ]

Western men and women have the same rate of interracial relationships in Korea

[ 3 ]

Western women date Korean men slightly more often

[ 4 ]

Western women date Korean men significantly more often

[ 3 ]

Total Votes : 71

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Alyallen

Joined: 29 Mar 2004
Location: The 4th Greatest Place on Earth = Jeonju!!!

Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2007 7:00 pm Post subject:

peppermint wrote:

SPIN, not really sure what you're on about. The post wasn't offensive, so much as just odd. Confused

What do prevalence and predisposition have to do with the OP?

I know a lot more white guys dating Korean women than white girls dating Korean men. I think I (personally) know more white women married to Korean men, than the opposite now that I think of it. Probably says more about my circle of friends than anything about the interracial dating scene though

Odd is right...People like who they like. I don't know why anyone would be scared of Black people...especially Black women. It's not like we have two heads and breathe fire. And it's not like the men have three heads and hmmm shoot people? In any event, anyone so intimidated based on stereotypes doesn't deserve to date anyone EVER. But to use some of Spinoza's words, "Hopefully there won't be any personal insults against me ('I'd sooner date an Asian woman than a vile three headdedpig like you, Aly, any day' for instance) as a result of my honest opinion."

I have been in Korea for 3 years and have only dated White guys. As another poster said, usually the Korean guys involved with Western ladies are usually more "well rounded." I would imagine a Korean guy would need to be extra "well rounded" to date a Black woman like myself. All the married interracial couples I know in Korea are Western Man/Korean Woman. But I'm not in a big city so there might be less variability here.

jessie-b

Joined: 17 Apr 2006

Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2007 7:14 pm Post subject:

I agree that IDEALLY we like who we like. We can certainly "hook up" with who we like, I guess. But there are many things to consider in relationships and "marrying up" is definitly a way that many people choose..whether its to travel, support their family, be a part of a different social circle. My ex was Filipino and his mom married a white soldier (after he was born). She doesn't like her husband very much, but she's been able to support her family in the Phillipines and send her sons to college, buy a house. Her husband didn't help her do this, she worked her A$$ off for it.

jessie-b

Joined: 17 Apr 2006

Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2007 7:20 pm Post subject:

Alyallen wrote:

peppermint wrote:

SPIN, not really sure what you're on about. The post wasn't offensive, so much as just odd. Confused

The high school and college boys in my discussion class were talking about what "style" they were attracted to, and that turned into ethnicities. Almost all of them said they want to date a Black woman. Guess you should go for the younger Korean guys.

SPINOZA

Joined: 10 Jun 2005
Location: $eoul

Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2007 7:36 pm Post subject:

Atavistic wrote:

SPINOZA wrote:

peppermint wrote:

SPIN, not really sure what you're on about. The post wasn't offensive, so much as just odd. Confused

What do prevalence and predisposition have to do with the OP?

Well, I don't really want to continue the discussion, but to clarify, if you took all the mixed-race couples and marriages in the world, I suspect a large percentage will be white guy-with-Asian girl.

You ever hear of people getting married in order to better their economic status?

So, Pligganease, there you have it.....Korean and Japanese chicks are mingling with the Western guys to get their lil hands on some of that fat 2.3 million Won per month hagwon pay check.

Sarcasm aside, maybe it's a factor, since English teachers in Korea earn well above per capita GDP and that's what some save. That said, it's not a furtune and the suggestion that Korean girls readily date Western guys to better their status is a little difficult to entertain whilst maintaining a straight face and almost utterly inapplicable to Japan - a more vibrant dating scene (and significantly wealthier country) than Korea - where salaries are abysmal and the Yen a poor currency.

Quote:

a lot of discussions (not on Dave's) about intercultural relationships actually explore (seriously, thus, again, not on Dave's) the aspects of racism (external and internal), fetishism, "marrying up," etc in intercultural dating.

Quote:

You know why a lot of those mail-order bride services work? It's not because the women are more attracted to (usually white) Western men, it's cause they're attracted to their money, citizenship, and social status.

I am NOT saying this is the sole reason why Korean women in this day and age date Western men, yadda yadda. I'm just saying that SPINOZA (one of my least favorite philosphers in my course of study) needs to broaden his idea of why people get into relationships past "they find each other sexy."

Your point is fine, but, if I was a proponent of that view, I'd be sure to take into consideration why white guys who go for the whole wife/prostitute thing seem to go to Asia and not Africa. Africa is poor as sh*t, there must be zillions of girls who'd be willing to better their economic status because they're attracted to their money, citizenship, and social status. But no - sex tourism, prozzie-wives are a largely Asian phenomena, unless I'm very much mistaken.

Anyway, we've drifted from the point and that's my fault for bringing up the East Asian girl-on-white guy dating/marriage combination seeming extremely common, but Plig's enquiry deals with Korea, a relatively wealthy country where teaching English and being Caucasian has about as much social status as licking public toilets. Proponents of the view that there are so many white-guy-with-Asian-girl relationships for any other reason than for what they sppear to be should think on, I feel.

Pligganease

Joined: 14 Sep 2004
Location: The deep south...

Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2007 7:41 pm Post subject:

SPINOZA wrote:

So, Pligganease, there you have it.....Korean and Japanese chicks are mingling with the Western guys to get their lil hands on some of that fat 2.3 million Won per month hagwon pay check.

So, it's all about the Sejongs?

Alyallen

Joined: 29 Mar 2004
Location: The 4th Greatest Place on Earth = Jeonju!!!

Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2007 7:44 pm Post subject:

jessie-b wrote:

Alyallen wrote:

peppermint wrote:

SPIN, not really sure what you're on about. The post wasn't offensive, so much as just odd. Confused

Hahaha...No thanks. I've been here long enough that I don't want to date a Korean guy. Besides, I have a lovely Bulgarian boyfriend waiting for me in America? What more can a girl hope for, even if we are a poor match according to some people Rolling Eyes

in_seoul_2003

Joined: 24 Nov 2003

Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2007 7:47 pm Post subject:

jessie-b wrote:

Almost all of them said they want to date a Black woman. Guess you should go for the younger Korean guys.

Well, allot of people want to BE with a black woman but fewer people want to BE with a black woman.

In the last 500 years in Europe, for example, alot of white men fetishized encounters with black women who were stereotyped as deviant, amazonian, and aggresive (alot of this still remains). Though they were eroticized by the fantasy of such an encounter enough to write about it, such plays and novels never had the men actually marrying these black women.

This stands in contrast to European fantasies dealing with other non-European women who were far more likely to be typecast as marriagable than black women.

Atavistic

Joined: 22 May 2006
Location: How totally stupid that Korean doesn't show in this area.

Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2007 7:55 pm Post subject:

SPINOZA wrote:

So, Pligganease, there you have it.....Korean and Japanese chicks are mingling with the Western guys to get their lil hands on some of that fat 2.3 million Won per month hagwon pay check.

Oh please. Thank you for ignoring the rest of the post.

I said that I am NOT saying this is the reason in Korea. However, there are MULTIPLE FACTORS about intercultural dating that Dave's will never hit on because the men, generally, want to boil it down to "we're hot, Asian women are hot, Asian men have small penises and Western women are fat."

Historically, guess what, Korean and Japanese women DID marry white guys (usually missionaries or military) to get out of here and to marry up. Sorry if you don't like it. Also, 2.3 is a fat paycheck compared to what my straight-out-of-college-male-Korean friends are getting for job offers.

As for your crap about Africa, well, with the wars going on, a lot of women in those countries are busy running the gov't while their men are dying. Give it time. As for sex tourism, do you KNOW the AIDS rates in large parts of Africa? Hello... I do recall reading, when I went to Thailand, that in Thailand one of the most popular forms of sex tourism was Japanese women with black men. I'll see if I can find that source again, but don't hold your breath.

And sex tourism is NOT just an Asian thing. You've obviously never been to Central America. Go to Costa Rica--anti-sex-tourism ads all over the place. Atlanta, Georgia, USA is a HUGE HUGE market for the child sex market. Many of those children, by the way, are coming from Africa. So yes, you are, like the rest of your post, very much mistaken.

But I'm not sure why I'm wasting my breath. Like I said, serious discussions about the various factors that go into relationships, especially intercultural ones, are not to be had on Dave's. It's impossible. Like trying to teach a pig to sing.

blondebecky

Joined: 22 Jul 2006

Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2007 7:56 pm Post subject: Re: Interracial dating/marriage in Korea

Atavistic wrote:

SPINOZA wrote:

white guy with Asian girl is a good combination. They find each other attractive. Another good combo is white woman with black guy.

Poor combinations in my opinion would be white woman with Asian guy and white guy with black girl.

You do realize that people are people and not sandwich toppings right (strawberry jam and rhubarb is OK, strawberry jam and peanut butter is OK, rhubarb and peanut butter are bad!)?

Guess what, I find my Korean boyfriend attractive, and he finds me attractive.

Wow, your post is so incredibly racist and stupid.

Well said.

However, it is true that, in Korea at least, there are far more western male/Korean female couples than korean male/Western female couples. I think this is partly because of the disparity between the number of Western males/females in Korea, and also as a result of negative stereotypes of Asian males generally throughout the media in the West.
White Hollywood (male) directors/producers have a fantastic track record of portraying Asian men as a. wimpy, limp wristed cissies b. violent gangsters c. abusive husbands (Joy Luck Club, anyone?)

The truth is, there are bad, rude, inconsiderate Korean men, just as there are kind, courteous, chivalrous Korean guys also. I happen to be married to one of them.

in_seoul_2003

Joined: 24 Nov 2003

Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2007 8:08 pm Post subject: Re: Interracial dating/marriage in Korea

blondebecky wrote:

and also as a result of negative stereotypes of Asian males generally throughout the media in the West.

Yes, but two things:

1. Whenever it's a bad thing, it's always generalized to 'Asian'. Whenever it's a good thing, it's always localized to Korean. How about Korean negative stereotypes? Is it possible that some Western women don't want to date Korean (not Asian in general) men? I certainly know of quite a few SE Asian women who wouldn't touch Korean men with a ten foot pole, but don't have similar feelings toward other Asian men.

2. Don't feel too bad about sterotypes against Korean men because Korea has a lot of stereotypes that bolster its men in a positive light. For example, do Koreans really think that Vietnamese women are dying to marry a Korea "Prince" as many media put it?

Tiger Beer

Joined: 07 Feb 2003

Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2007 8:13 pm Post subject:

Pligganease wrote:

It seems to me that western men date/marry Korean women at significantly higher rates than western women date Korean men. Why is that? I've been reading a lot of threads lately about the high numbers of non-Korean women dating Korean men, but I haven't seen it.

Maybe I've not been in the right places at the right times? I have dozens of friends who have married or are dating Korean women, but I only know of one western girl who ever dated a Korean man. Why is that?

I'd disagree. I know TONS of western women who date and marry Korean men. It's very commonplace.

I'm pretty sure at least a dozen of such women post on Daves ELS cafe alone. In almost every work environment I've been in in Korea, seems like at least half of the western women are married to Korean men. The other half I'd qualify as just having got here and figuring Korea out.

Most western guys don't see it because they are busy trying to meet Korean women.

in_seoul_2003

Joined: 24 Nov 2003

Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2007 8:25 pm Post subject:

Quote:

I'd disagree. I know TONS of western women who date and marry Korean men. It's very commonplace.

Ah... is it really "commonplace"? If we go by work environments alone, I know of two women who have dated Korean men out of the 24 or so women I've ever worked with.

"TONS"?

Besides aren't there international marriage statistics that deal with this? Newspapers in Korea are always publishing numbers of marriages between Western women and Korean men. It's not that high, certainly not deserving of a "commonplace" or a "TONS".

livinginkunsan

Joined: 02 Dec 2006

Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2007 8:29 pm Post subject:

Tiger Beer wrote:

I'm pretty sure at least a dozen of such women post on Daves ELS cafe alone. In almost every work environment I've been in in Korea, seems like at least half of the western women are married to Korean men. The other half I'd qualify as just having got here and figuring Korea out.

My experience is the complete opposite, and I believe that 50% is a hugely inflated figure. You can't be in Korea Tiger beer, cause they dont sell what you are smoking Wink

ps. you still playing DT? Nemo and frombie are Wink

Tiger Beer

Joined: 07 Feb 2003

Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2007 8:40 pm Post subject:

in_seoul_2003 wrote:

jessie-b wrote:

Almost all of them said they want to date a Black woman. Guess you should go for the younger Korean guys.

But then there is Brazil, Cuba, Dominican Republic, etc...all of which white european mated, married, and mixed regularly and their offspring are still there to prove it.

It was essentially a BRITISH thing not to mix with the locals of where you were colonizing. A different class of people, etc. Hence a weird thing developed n British colonies, British-dominated places, etc.

Pligganease

Joined: 14 Sep 2004
Location: The deep south...

Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2007 8:43 pm Post subject:

Tiger Beer wrote:

50% is an amazing number. I don't and never have lived in Seoul, so maybe it's different there (if that's where you are). I can only speak from my experience, which is why I asked about others' experiences.

Your experience is completely different than mine, but I guess that is what makes Korea great, huh?

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