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twg
Joined: 02 Nov 2006
Location: Getting some fresh air...
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 Posted: Sat Sep 15, 2007 9:14 am Post subject: Re: So, you're going away for a year? Wanna shag?! |
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| nautilus wrote: |
| Atavistic wrote: |
| If I want a one-night stand, it's going to be with someone I have NO history with whatsoever. |
So loyal deserving friend for many years in love with you gets nothing, random total stranger gets the full unbridled rompy? Nice. |
Excellent!
Excuse me miss, we've never met. Please bend over and grab your high heels. |
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peppermint
Joined: 13 May 2003
Location: traversing the minefields of caddishness.
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| Posted: Sat Sep 15, 2007 9:55 am Post subject: |
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maybe it's chick logic, but it makes perfect sense to me.
Sleeping with the guy who loves you just that one time, and then taking off for a year will only string him along, ruin the friendship and it doesn't sound as though there's any heat there anyway.
| twg wrote: |
| Excuse me miss, we've never met. Please bend over and grab your high heels. |
Now that's hot!  |
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Chloe11
Joined: 23 Jul 2007
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| Posted: Sat Sep 15, 2007 11:22 am Post subject: |
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| Mr Crowley wrote: |
Maybe they want to give you something to remember them by (STD).  |
My friend told me that he wants me to infect South Korea with the clap. I told him that while I wasn't going to test this theory, South Korea more than likely already had the clap.
So yes, it's been discussed |
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Draz
Joined: 27 Jun 2007
Location: Land of Morning Clam
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| Posted: Sat Sep 15, 2007 12:57 pm Post subject: Re: So, you're going away for a year? Wanna shag?! |
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| nautilus wrote: |
| Atavistic wrote: |
| If I want a one-night stand, it's going to be with someone I have NO history with whatsoever. |
So loyal deserving friend for many years in love with you gets nothing, random total stranger gets the full unbridled rompy? Nice. |
No room for resentment. Can't "ruin the friendship" if you aren't friends. |
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Draz
Joined: 27 Jun 2007
Location: Land of Morning Clam
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| Posted: Sat Sep 15, 2007 1:06 pm Post subject: Re: So, you're going away for a year? Wanna shag?! |
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| Big_Bird wrote: |
| Draz wrote: |
| Chloe11 wrote: |
I'm not writing this to boast. I really consider myself relatively average looking on a good day. I was just wondering if this is normal behaviour... did anybody else go through this prior to taking a leap out of their home country for a year abroad? |
Now that they know they won't have to see you every day for the rest of their lives, they are comfortable letting you know they want a no string attached *beep*.
It's not a compliment. |
It's not necessarily an insult either. |
Insult might be too strong of a word, but it's still better than compliment. He's saying "yeah, I want you, 'friend'. But only if it isn't too much trouble for me." Hmph. No thanks. Guy puts in no effort out of the sack, he's probably not going to be very effective in it either. |
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Atavistic
Joined: 22 May 2006
Location: How totally stupid that Korean doesn't show in this area.
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| Posted: Sat Sep 15, 2007 3:07 pm Post subject: |
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Peppermint and Draz get it. The men don't.
Why doesn't this surprise me? |
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Atavistic
Joined: 22 May 2006
Location: How totally stupid that Korean doesn't show in this area.
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| Posted: Sat Sep 15, 2007 3:08 pm Post subject: Re: So, you're going away for a year? Wanna shag?! |
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| nautilus wrote: |
| Atavistic wrote: |
| If I want a one-night stand, it's going to be with someone I have NO history with whatsoever. |
So loyal deserving friend for many years in love with you gets nothing, random total stranger gets the full unbridled rompy? Nice. |
If the friend were in love with me for years, he'd know me well enough to know not to tell me that days before I left the country. Maybe your female friends would find that romantic. I find that bullshit and any one of my close friends--in love with me or not--would know it. |
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nautilus
Joined: 26 Nov 2005
Location: Je jump, Tu jump, oui jump!
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| Posted: Sat Sep 15, 2007 7:57 pm Post subject: |
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| peppermint wrote: |
Sleeping with the guy who loves you just that one time, and then taking off for a year will only string him along, ruin the friendship and it doesn't sound as though there's any heat there anyway. |
The basic truth is that women do not want guys who want them. They only want to sleep with guys..that don't want to sleep with them. By declaring his love, he garuanteed his failure and a "lets just be friends" lecture.
| Draz wrote: |
| Peppermint and Draz get it. The men don't. |
No, I get it. I know this is not the "mysogyny thread" but its obvious that on the face of it, its an unfair logic at play. Loyal friend may be the most deserving but random stranger gets the gold. In fact the less deserving he is, the more likely he is to hit the target. In essence, a man is not permitted to fall for a woman: only females get that luxury and still manage to hold onto the object of their desire.
You see it everywhere: the only lasting relationships are ones where the guy is fully in control because he has no real emotional attachment to the woman. If a guy has feelings, he will soon be single again.  |
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Are they the lemmings
Joined: 15 Feb 2007
Location: Not here anymore. JongnoGuru was the only thing that kept me here.
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| Posted: Sat Sep 15, 2007 8:50 pm Post subject: Re: So, you're going away for a year? Wanna shag?! |
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I would gladly pay $20 to see a show by a band called:
| nautilus wrote: |
| full unbridled rompy |
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Sincinnatislink
Joined: 30 Jan 2007
Location: Top secret.
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| Posted: Sat Sep 15, 2007 8:59 pm Post subject: |
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| So OP, did/are you getting laid or not? |
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riley
Joined: 08 Feb 2003
Location: where creditors can find me
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| Posted: Sat Sep 15, 2007 9:08 pm Post subject: |
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I've got to ask if the same situation happens when the woman (or man) leaves Korea.
"So, um, we won't be seeing each other since you're going back home, so, why don't we do it?"
It sounds like something from summer camp when we were younger. |
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Draz
Joined: 27 Jun 2007
Location: Land of Morning Clam
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| Posted: Sat Sep 15, 2007 9:40 pm Post subject: |
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| nautilus wrote: |
| peppermint wrote: |
Sleeping with the guy who loves you just that one time, and then taking off for a year will only string him along, ruin the friendship and it doesn't sound as though there's any heat there anyway. |
The basic truth is that women do not want guys who want them. They only want to sleep with guys..that don't want to sleep with them. By declaring his love, he garuanteed his failure and a "lets just be friends" lecture. |
Sure we do. We just need to want them back. If you've been friends for years and nothing has happened, there's at least one person there who doesn't want. And then to suddenly declare feelings right when he finds out she's going overseas? Sounds like he was deliberately setting himself up for failure. Or a cheap lay. OR he actually wanted her to drop everything and change all her plans to be with him. One of those. Not sure which one is the worst.
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| Atavistic wrote: |
| Peppermint and Draz get it. The men don't. |
No, I get it. I know this is not the "mysogyny thread" but its obvious that on the face of it, its an unfair logic at play. Loyal friend may be the most deserving but random stranger gets the gold. In fact the less deserving he is, the more likely he is to hit the target. In essence, a man is not permitted to fall for a woman: only females get that luxury and still manage to hold onto the object of their desire. |
The only unfair logic is how being a good friend would make someone "deserving" of sex. You don't earn sex. Either two people want to have sex with each other or they don't. Can't trade friendship for sex, sex for sex is the way it works between friends. If no one wants your sex, you can find someone who will take cash but trying to cash in friendship is... icky.
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You see it everywhere: the only lasting relationships are ones where the guy is fully in control because he has no real emotional attachment to the woman. If a guy has feelings, he will soon be single again. |
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nautilus
Joined: 26 Nov 2005
Location: Je jump, Tu jump, oui jump!
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| Posted: Sat Sep 15, 2007 9:52 pm Post subject: |
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| Draz wrote: |
| If you've been friends for years and nothing has happened, there's at least one person there who doesn't want. And then to suddenly declare feelings right when he finds out she's going overseas? Sounds like he was deliberately setting himself up for failure. Or a cheap lay. ( |
Being a bit harsh aren't we? Maybe you've never had feelings for someone, but if you have you'll know how nervous/shy you might become with declaring such feelings? But to you thats all just a sign of weakness. You'd rather be with someone who has no feelings because he acts completely cool and in control.
You see this is what happens. And then later when the woman is cheated on/ dumped for someone else, she suddenly seeks out mr nice genuine guy again to pick up the pieces.
I'm not blaming anyone for their nature. Just saying this is a biological imperative that bears little relation to our societal notions of what is fair or just. |
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Chloe11
Joined: 23 Jul 2007
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| Posted: Sun Sep 16, 2007 12:12 am Post subject: |
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| Sincinnatislink wrote: |
| So OP, did/are you getting laid or not? |
Heh. Fair question, though you're likely just pulling my leg
To answer the question, no, I didn't take anybody up on their offers yet. I doubt that I will. Frankly, I wasn't all that flattered and only had any interest in one. My issues with that particular individual would result in a long, not very interesting story... so I won't get it to it.  |
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Atavistic
Joined: 22 May 2006
Location: How totally stupid that Korean doesn't show in this area.
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| Posted: Sun Sep 16, 2007 12:46 am Post subject: |
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| nautilus wrote: |
No, I get it. I know this is not the "mysogyny thread" but its obvious that on the face of it, its an unfair logic at play. Loyal friend may be the most deserving but random stranger gets the gold. In fact the less deserving he is, the more likely he is to hit the target. In essence, a man is not permitted to fall for a woman: only females get that luxury and still manage to hold onto the object of their desire. |
Thinking some female friend's pu ssy is your wish fulfillment center is unfair logic at play.
As for the rest of your crap, "only females get the luxury," blah blah blah. Sounds like you've tried to apply your screwy logic to one too many female friends and gotten shot down, buddy. |
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