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The "ideal" teachers....
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lastat06513



Joined: 18 Mar 2003
Location: Sensus amo Caesar , etiamnunc victus amo uni plebian

PostPosted: Sat Dec 01, 2007 3:51 am    Post subject: The "ideal" teachers.... Reply with quote

For your entertainment.....


Here are some prime candidates to become teachers in Korea......


Todd (Detroit, MI)
He has a BA in basketweaving and a TESOL certificate he got out of a box of Rice Krispies. He currently lives in a small shack in the woods, where he spends 90% of his time between Warcarft and porn.


Kirk (Springfield, MA)
He is a senior at UConn where he studies music and dance. He loves unicorns and horses and dances in an amateur dance troupe during his winter and summer breaks. He wants to teach in South Korea because he loves anime and is determined that all the best animation comes from Korea instead of Japan and tries to brush his teeth so they can be as sparkling as "Sparkling Korea*"
Nickname: Twinkletoes.... Shocked


Jake (Tuscon, AZ)
He loves to play computer games and is a committed gamer to the point he dropped out of school, spends 19 hours a day at the computer perfecting his gaming technique so he can come to Korea and supposely "whip Korea's ass" in computer gaming competitions. Oh! In case you're wondering.....he DOES have a degree, just not a real one.....and his "friends" say his left hand twitches...... Confused

and last but certainly not least.....
TA~DA!!!!!!

Timmy (South Park, CO)
He has no degree and only says one word "Timmy!" But he does have a smile and an inquisitive attitude that makes up for the lack of vocabulary. He is ideal because he has no criminal record, doesn't do drugs nor drinks- perfect for any university that just wants a warm body in the classroom.

Very Happy [/quote]
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Roch



Joined: 24 Apr 2003
Location: Seoul

PostPosted: Sat Dec 01, 2007 5:36 am    Post subject: Re: The "ideal" teachers.... Reply with quote

lastat06513 wrote:
For your entertainment.....


Here are some prime candidates to become teachers in Korea......


Todd (Detroit, MI)
He has a BA in basketweaving and a TESOL certificate he got out of a box of Rice Krispies. He currently lives in a small shack in the woods, where he spends 90% of his time between Warcarft and porn.


Kirk (Springfield, MA)
He is a senior at UConn where he studies music and dance. He loves unicorns and horses and dances in an amateur dance troupe during his winter and summer breaks. He wants to teach in South Korea because he loves anime and is determined that all the best animation comes from Korea instead of Japan and tries to brush his teeth so they can be as sparkling as "Sparkling Korea*"
Nickname: Twinkletoes.... :shock:


Jake (Tuscon, AZ)
He loves to play computer games and is a committed gamer to the point he dropped out of school, spends 19 hours a day at the computer perfecting his gaming technique so he can come to Korea and supposely "whip Korea's ass" in computer gaming competitions. Oh! In case you're wondering.....he DOES have a degree, just not a real one.....and his "friends" say his left hand twitches...... :?

and last but certainly not least.....
TA~DA!!!!!!

Timmy (South Park, CO)
He has no degree and only says one word "Timmy!" But he does have a smile and an inquisitive attitude that makes up for the lack of vocabulary. He is ideal because he has no criminal record, doesn't do drugs nor drinks- perfect for any university that just wants a warm body in the classroom.

:D
[/quote]

The first applicant needs a haircut; the second guy needs to get a haircut; and, the third applicant needs to get a haircut.

R
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Ilsanman



Joined: 15 Aug 2003
Location: Bucheon, Korea

PostPosted: Sat Dec 01, 2007 5:43 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

The real question is, if all 3 went out partying in Itaewon, who would get laid first?
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Roch



Joined: 24 Apr 2003
Location: Seoul

PostPosted: Sat Dec 01, 2007 5:46 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ilsanman:

I'd bet that all could get their Jones Off to the Nth Degree if they wanted to do so.

Power to English Teach-uhs !!!

R
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djsmnc



Joined: 20 Jan 2003
Location: Dave's ESL Cafe

PostPosted: Sat Dec 01, 2007 6:34 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Those images seem like stereotypical representations, not the "ideal"

The "ideal" would be:




Justin teacher
Twentysomething

Perfectly handsome, thin, and tall. No piercings, no tattoos, no strange hairstyles. Ivy league english degree with a minor in Korean Studies. Has a perfect midwestern American accent which he loves to provide free English lessons with. Doesn't show any interest in Korean women except reverance to the fact that they are the most beautiful in the world, which is why he can't consider being with one, and he prefers the company of his male students for drinking and karaoke. Is really happy to make a low salary and have a small studio apartment, because he wants to teach for the sake of teaching. Loves kimchi, but acknowledges that it is too spicy for foreigners, compared to the hamburgers and pizza they eat every day.
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crusher_of_heads



Joined: 23 Feb 2007
Location: kimbop and kimchi for kimberly!!!!

PostPosted: Sat Dec 01, 2007 6:34 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

lastat...


The Quality of Mercy is not strained....
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mysteriousdeltarays



Joined: 07 Feb 2003
Location: Food Pyramid Bldg. 5F, 77 Sunset Strip, Alphaville

PostPosted: Sat Dec 01, 2007 6:51 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I think Canadian homosexual Catholic theological student with an interest in pedophilia and a long track record in Laos, Cambodia, Thailand and Viet Nam.

Shaved head, sporty shades, baggy shorts and sandals. Well a few tats couldn't hurt.

An interest in The Gym.

Short of that a few jailhouse tats and an interest in the dojo (for kyobos only.)
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lastat06513



Joined: 18 Mar 2003
Location: Sensus amo Caesar , etiamnunc victus amo uni plebian

PostPosted: Sat Dec 01, 2007 7:27 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Which was worse?

Here or this one:
http://forums.eslcafe.com/korea/viewtopic.php?t=104900&highlight=

People said I was really inconsiderate in that one, but I don't see how Question
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whatever



Joined: 11 Jun 2006
Location: Korea: More fun than jail.

PostPosted: Sat Dec 01, 2007 7:36 pm    Post subject: Re: The "ideal" teachers.... Reply with quote

lastat06513 wrote:
...where he spends 90% of his time between Warcarft and porn...


hahaha! sounds like most of my Korean friends, god bless 'em.
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The Hammer



Joined: 18 Jan 2003
Location: Ullungdo 37.5 N, 130.9 E, altitude : 223 m

PostPosted: Sat Dec 01, 2007 7:56 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

My cousin teaches for Middle School 13 in LA and he is to coming over in January to teach. His area of expertise is culture and cultural differences.

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Optimus Prime



Joined: 05 Jul 2007

PostPosted: Sat Dec 01, 2007 8:08 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

djsmnc wrote:


Justin teacher
Twentysomething

Perfectly handsome, thin, and tall. No piercings, no tattoos, no strange hairstyles. Ivy league english degree with a minor in Korean Studies. Has a perfect midwestern American accent which he loves to provide free English lessons with. Doesn't show any interest in Korean women except reverance to the fact that they are the most beautiful in the world, which is why he can't consider being with one, and he prefers the company of his male students for drinking and karaoke. Is really happy to make a low salary and have a small studio apartment, because he wants to teach for the sake of teaching. Loves kimchi, but acknowledges that it is too spicy for foreigners, compared to the hamburgers and pizza they eat every day.



awesome
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Ilsanman



Joined: 15 Aug 2003
Location: Bucheon, Korea

PostPosted: Sat Dec 01, 2007 9:04 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

You forgot that he came here to bask in the glory of the 4 distinct seasons.

Optimus Prime wrote:
djsmnc wrote:


Justin teacher
Twentysomething

Perfectly handsome, thin, and tall. No piercings, no tattoos, no strange hairstyles. Ivy league english degree with a minor in Korean Studies. Has a perfect midwestern American accent which he loves to provide free English lessons with. Doesn't show any interest in Korean women except reverance to the fact that they are the most beautiful in the world, which is why he can't consider being with one, and he prefers the company of his male students for drinking and karaoke. Is really happy to make a low salary and have a small studio apartment, because he wants to teach for the sake of teaching. Loves kimchi, but acknowledges that it is too spicy for foreigners, compared to the hamburgers and pizza they eat every day.



awesome
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mysteriousdeltarays



Joined: 07 Feb 2003
Location: Food Pyramid Bldg. 5F, 77 Sunset Strip, Alphaville

PostPosted: Sat Dec 01, 2007 10:40 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Tats ahoy. And jail house ones are best.
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earthbound14



Joined: 23 Jan 2007
Location: seoul

PostPosted: Sun Dec 02, 2007 1:43 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

where did you buy your hair dye from?
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bejarano-korea



Joined: 13 Dec 2006

PostPosted: Sun Dec 02, 2007 2:25 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

djsmnc wrote:
Those images seem like stereotypical representations, not the "ideal"

The "ideal" would be:




Justin teacher
Twentysomething

Perfectly handsome, thin, and tall. No piercings, no tattoos, no strange hairstyles. Ivy league english degree with a minor in Korean Studies. Has a perfect midwestern American accent which he loves to provide free English lessons with. Doesn't show any interest in Korean women except reverance to the fact that they are the most beautiful in the world, which is why he can't consider being with one, and he prefers the company of his male students for drinking and karaoke. Is really happy to make a low salary and have a small studio apartment, because he wants to teach for the sake of teaching. Loves kimchi, but acknowledges that it is too spicy for foreigners, compared to the hamburgers and pizza they eat every day.


Post of the day! Laughing


Quote:
and he prefers the company of his male students for drinking and karaoke.


Spending a night singing Karaoke with a load of Korean blokes wherever I knew them or not would be at no1 position in 'worst night out ever'
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