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Faunaki
Joined: 15 Jun 2007
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 Posted: Mon Dec 24, 2007 5:09 am Post subject: What's up with the insult before the compliment? |
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Interview question for SMOE elementary teachers:
Min-su just won the swimming championship. What do you say to him?
Teacher: Min-su good job! You so short and so small. I never believe you can win. But you win. I can't believe. But remember to study hard. Fighting! |
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djsmnc
Joined: 20 Jan 2003
Location: Dave's ESL Cafe
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| Posted: Mon Dec 24, 2007 5:19 am Post subject: |
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| Umm...a sphincter says what? |
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Bibbitybop
Joined: 22 Feb 2006
Location: Seoul
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| Posted: Mon Dec 24, 2007 11:07 am Post subject: |
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We need more info.
Is this a Korean teacher responding to this question?
I had an opposite experience recently. A Korean bloke was chatting with a friend and I and having a good time at a bar. We thought he was a fun-loving, good guy. Then out of nowhere he said something inappropriate and insulting, thinking it was funny. Maybe it was because we were foreigners? Each of us called the guy on it respectfully (instead of knocking his drink into his face as would've happened back home) and the guy was stunned and simply walked away from us.
I looked back on the incident and wondered why we were so respectful to him. Maybe it was the fear of being a foreigner in a hostile situation and any later police involvement would be against us. But we really felt it was pity in the end, we just didn't realize it at the drunken time. It was like a 10 year old boy insulting us. That's how we treated him, like teachers. And that's how he walked away, like 10 year old boy. I'm living in a world of childish adults. |
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itaewonguy
Joined: 25 Mar 2003
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| Posted: Mon Dec 24, 2007 11:13 am Post subject: |
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| Bibbitybop wrote: |
We need more info.
Is this a Korean teacher responding to this question?
I had an opposite experience recently. A Korean bloke was chatting with a friend and I and having a good time at a bar. We thought he was a fun-loving, good guy. Then out of nowhere he said something inappropriate and insulting, thinking it was funny. Maybe it was because we were foreigners? Each of us called the guy on it respectfully (instead of knocking his drink into his face as would've happened back home) and the guy was stunned and simply walked away from us.
I looked back on the incident and wondered why we were so respectful to him. Maybe it was the fear of being a foreigner in a hostile situation and any later police involvement would be against us. But we really felt it was pity in the end, we just didn't realize it at the drunken time. It was like a 10 year old boy insulting us. That's how we treated him, like teachers. And that's how he walked away, like 10 year old boy. I'm living in a world of childish adults. |
what did he say?? |
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Bibbitybop
Joined: 22 Feb 2006
Location: Seoul
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| Posted: Mon Dec 24, 2007 11:26 am Post subject: |
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| He made a comment about me and my friend's age difference. It wasn't the comment that we cared about. Who cares about about hanging out with people who are 5 years of age apart?? Oh yeah, a lot of Koreans. It was the manner in which he said it, he showed disgust or contempt, and I'm guessing this guy was a uni student who never had friends of a different age. BTW, both my friend myself are under 30, it wasn't a old man bashing event. I'd like to think that if either my friend or I was elderly, like over 70, we'd still either tell the prick to shove off, or lift his drink into his face. Old, crazy men who hold their own rule. |
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Shimokitazawa
Joined: 14 Dec 2007
Location: Seoul
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| Posted: Mon Dec 24, 2007 12:04 pm Post subject: Re: What's up with the insult before the compliment? |
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| Faunaki wrote: |
Interview question for SMOE elementary teachers:
Min-su just won the swimming championship. What do you say to him?
Teacher: Min-su good job! You so short and so small. I never believe you can win. But you win. I can't believe. But remember to study hard. Fighting! |
I don't get it - Who's answering the question - You  |
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dogshed
Joined: 28 Apr 2006
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| Posted: Mon Dec 24, 2007 1:27 pm Post subject: |
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| Bibbitybop wrote: |
We need more info.
Is this a Korean teacher responding to this question?
I had an opposite experience recently. A Korean bloke was chatting with a friend and I and having a good time at a bar. We thought he was a fun-loving, good guy. Then out of nowhere he said something inappropriate and insulting, thinking it was funny. Maybe it was because we were foreigners? Each of us called the guy on it respectfully (instead of knocking his drink into his face as would've happened back home) and the guy was stunned and simply walked away from us.
I looked back on the incident and wondered why we were so respectful to him. Maybe it was the fear of being a foreigner in a hostile situation and any later police involvement would be against us. But we really felt it was pity in the end, we just didn't realize it at the drunken time. It was like a 10 year old boy insulting us. That's how we treated him, like teachers. And that's how he walked away, like 10 year old boy. I'm living in a world of childish adults. |
Narcissistic Personality Disorder |
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Faunaki
Joined: 15 Jun 2007
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| Posted: Mon Dec 24, 2007 4:05 pm Post subject: |
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Sorry I was drinking last night - I was supposed to go out but that didn't happen so .....
Just I noticed that before a Korean gives a compliment they usually throw an insult in first. I was interviewing and just happened to notice that most teachers insulted Min-su (the character in the question) first before praising him. Like 20/30 teachers did it. I wonder why they have to do that? Why not just say wow, you are amazing! Good job! |
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Faunaki
Joined: 15 Jun 2007
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| Posted: Mon Dec 24, 2007 4:12 pm Post subject: |
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| Bibbitybop wrote: |
| I'm living in a world of childish adults. |
I have said this exact same thing before. I told it to my husband and he just laughed and said yes but Canadians act like selfish animals.
Merry Christmas, going to the fish market now for some sashimi. |
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Draz
Joined: 27 Jun 2007
Location: Land of Morning Clam
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| Posted: Mon Dec 24, 2007 4:15 pm Post subject: Re: What's up with the insult before the compliment? |
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| Faunaki wrote: |
Interview question for SMOE elementary teachers:
Min-su just won the swimming championship. What do you say to him?
Teacher: Min-su good job! You so short and so small. I never believe you can win. But you win. I can't believe. But remember to study hard. Fighting! |
I think everyone is confused because they can't find the compliment. |
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JongnoGuru
Joined: 25 May 2004
Location: peeing on your doorstep
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| Posted: Mon Dec 24, 2007 4:47 pm Post subject: Re: What's up with the insult before the compliment? |
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| Draz wrote: |
| Faunaki wrote: |
Interview question for SMOE elementary teachers:
Min-su just won the swimming championship. What do you say to him?
Teacher: Min-su good job! You so short and so small. I never believe you can win. But you win. I can't believe. But remember to study hard. Fighting! |
I think everyone is confused because they can't find the compliment. |
Well, I can find the compliment, but was a bit puzzled because in her example, the compliment seems to have come first, followed by the insult.
"Min-su good job!" <--compliment "You so short and so small." <--insult
So maybe the thread title should have been: "What's up with the compliment followed by (or coupled with) the insult?"
Just a thought. |
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Justin Hale
Joined: 24 Nov 2007
Location: the Straight Talk Express
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| Posted: Mon Dec 24, 2007 5:45 pm Post subject: |
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I don't really understand the OP either. I get this bit:
| Quote: |
Interview question for SMOE elementary teachers:
Min-su just won the swimming championship. What do you say to him? |
You should say something complimentary and congratulatory to Min-su - "I say, well done, sir!" for instance.
But why did you give an answer for us here?
| Quote: |
| Teacher: Min-su good job! You so short and so small. I never believe you can win. But you win. I can't believe. But remember to study hard. Fighting! |
Whose answer is this?
Anyway, I urge all foreign workers in Korea to impress upon Koreans that, unless one has something pleasant to say, do not speak. I will respond "gosh, aren't Korean people extremely rude?" or "Japanese people are much more polite than Koreans. I never heard a Japanese person say that" (both strongly disliked) to any negative comments whatsoever, particularly regarding physical appearance, ability or race. The comments in Faunaki's OP violate two of those - assumptions about ability ("I didn't believe you could do it" is incredibly impolite) and the comments about Min-su's size. |
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highlander_76
Joined: 21 Mar 2007
Location: Jeongja
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| Posted: Tue Dec 25, 2007 4:51 am Post subject: |
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Yeah, unfortunately this is pretty typical in my experience, too. Just can't straight up give someone a compliment. It's like you have to knock'em down at least as much as you build'em up. I guess maybe they are afraid that if they compliment you too much that you will get too big a head - or worse, actually feel good about yourself.  |
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nautilus
Joined: 26 Nov 2005
Location: Je jump, Tu jump, oui jump!
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| Posted: Tue Dec 25, 2007 5:12 am Post subject: |
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| highlander_76 wrote: |
| or worse, actually feel good about yourself. |
yeah- they hate that.
Most times I have been quite happy, confident or pleased with myself here there is a Korean nearby ready to try and pis* on it.
There is a median of misery here and nobody must rise above it. |
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tanklor1
Joined: 13 Jun 2006
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| Posted: Tue Dec 25, 2007 7:29 am Post subject: |
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Don't any of you remember "Star Wars"?
Luke: HAH HAH I got one.
Solo: Great kid, don't get co cky.
Why don't want co cky students do we?
*I can't believe that Dave censors a Star Wars script!* |
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