Korean Job Discussion Forums

bassexpander · Joined: 13 Sep 2007 Location: Someplace you'd rather be.

My coworker, a waygook, is getting married. We were discussing who will will keep track of the money envelopes at his wedding as it comes in. This discussion happened over lunch, and a number of our Korean coworkers dining with us expressed that he really needs to find someone he trusts (a family member) to be a part of this process.

The overwhelming opinion of the Korean coworkers was that his future spouse's family is not to be trusted to fairly split the money.

As foreigners, both of us were shocked. It's an uncomforting thing to be told you shouldn't trust the very family you are marrying into.

When I was married, I left it up to her family, and it all seemed to turn out OK. Our coworkers said that I got lucky, and that this was a very bad idea. They urged my buddy to find someone he trusts to sit at the table and be a part of the process.

My coworker now feels a little upset/uncomfortable about the whole "money" situation. After how seriously our coworkers took it, and the strong opinions they offered about it, I can certainly understand.

When you married, how did you handle "the money?"

SuperFly · Joined: 09 Jul 2003 Location: In the doghouse

I got about 70K usd, but my father in law got a lot more because he put on the whole show. We had 2000 guests and the wedding took more than two hours from start to finish. This is the way I see it, most of those people were there because they had some sort of relationship with my FIL, not me or my wife. Since he paid into their weddings and I didn't, he gets to decide what to give us.

That's the way I saw it and I made out pretty good.

bassexpander · Joined: 13 Sep 2007 Location: Someplace you'd rather be.

2000 guests???

That's a freakin' huge wedding!

RACETRAITOR · Joined: 24 Oct 2005 Location: Seoul, South Korea

My sister-in-law had a 2000-guest wedding. She was marrying into a rich family and quite a few celebrities were there. I don't know why anyone would do that to themselves.

Maybe the reason for all this security is so no mistakes are made. They most likely have to make an accurate list of everyone who donated money, and how much money, so that they know how much to pay back to these individuals when it's their turn. If they give the wrong amount it's a major faux pas.

robot · Joined: 07 Mar 2006

Wow, 70 grand just for your take is quite the haul!

I'm not sure what we pulled in. My wife's parents took it, but I eventually realized this is fair since the money is theirs anyway, since they need to slowly pay the exact amount back as their friends' kids get hitched.

Plus they did pay for the entire wedding and bought us nice hanboks and a suit & dress.

The stuff from my family's side -- which was a different celebration on a different continent -- we kept, of course.