Korean Job Discussion Forums

Cheonmunka · Joined: 04 Jun 2004

My respects.
I couldn't say in any honesty that a funeral is a family gathering. It's usually a lot more intense.
If you really don't want to go then I think don't feel that you must. However, if you are saying you don't want to go as a given reason because you don't want to feel like you are disrupting your job and stuff, then well, only you can work it out. Maybe the job seems most important right now. As someone said, perhaps later there might be regrets about that. You can get the time off. She's your mom mate.
My respects to you for your loss. No matter what, we all love our moms.

Grief is a natural thing. Dude, be well. Take your feelings real slow. Let people know so they can leave you alone if need be. PS: Your feelings will still be with you tomorrow, believe me.

nicholas_chiasson · Joined: 14 Jun 2007 Location: Samcheok

poet13 · Posted: Mon Mar 17, 2008 4:42 am Post subject:

You're not a *hole for not going. When my mother dies, I will go, someway or another. When my father dies, eventually I will go back and piss all over his grave while I dance a jig.
We all grieve in our own way. How you do so is in no way righter or wronger than anyone else. If you are at ease with yourself, (and that's not a rhetorical question) then there is nothing more to do.
peace

anyway · Joined: 22 Oct 2005

Night Ranger · Joined: 17 Jan 2008

byunhosa · Joined: 18 Jan 2006 Location: Center Ice

ceesgetdegrees · Joined: 12 Jul 2007

I shouldn't have posted this as it's kinda fucked that people are going to start abusing each other in this thread, i suppose i did it at a time when i wasn't thinking that clearly so please delete it mods.

NightSky · Joined: 19 Apr 2005

laogaiguk · Joined: 06 Dec 2005 Location: somewhere in Korea

crusher_of_heads · Posted: Mon Mar 17, 2008 7:02 am Post subject:

MollyBloom · Joined: 21 Jul 2006 Location: James Joyce's pants

I definitely can understand what you are going through as I had to leave Korea for a couple of weeks for family reasons. It was a pain, but I am glad I did it.

I think you have to realize if this is something you might regret. And you don't want to have feelings of guilt, which could surface.

Perhaps if you go, it might be a way of making peace with her and with yourself.

On the other hand, as another poster said, funerals are intense.

When thinking about your decision, truly be selfish and think about what this will do for YOU.

I hope you make a decision you feel good about.

cbclark4 · Joined: 20 Aug 2006 Location: Masan

Night Ranger · Joined: 17 Jan 2008

bjonothan · Joined: 29 Apr 2003 Location: All over the place

If you read all of the rest of the replies on here, I would like to offer my condolences and support what you may be feeling about not going back.
Our father died when I was quite young and our mother was nuts and swore and mentally and verbally abused us all the time. She stole almost everything from me and I was kicked out with nowhere to go. All I got to keep was the few things I could get in my car and I lost the rest of my belongings including all sorts of collections and stuff that I started when I was very young.
Anyway, there is no way that when the biatch dies that I would make any effort whatsoever to show up at her funeral. I will actually be quite happy in fact.
If something that really warrants hard feelings is the cause like in my case, I would say that you are doing the right thing. If you are doing this because she wouldn't give you the new optimus prime on your 10th birthday and all of the other kids got one and you have some kind of ill feelings because of it, maybe you should go.
Once you have kids (if you haven't already) and you have got snotty nosed little rugrats running around of your own, you might decide that she wasn't a bad old stick after all and you might regret it.

I hope that helps you mate....

Rumple · Joined: 19 Sep 2007