Korean Job Discussion Forums

[mindmetoo]

Found on a blog. Some of these aren't even great rules. It's okay to split an infinitive and end on a preposition. Anyway, it was somewhat humorous.

HOW TO WRITE GOOD

1. Avoid alliteration. Always.

2. Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.

3. Avoid clich�s like the plague.

4. Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc., and don�t use contractions.

5. Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are to be avoided.

6. Remember that it is wrong to ever split an infinitive.

7. Foreign words and phrases, though en vogue, are not apropos.

8. One should never generalize.

9. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "I hate quotations. Tell me what you know."

10. Comparisons are as bad as clich�s.

11. Don't be redundant, don't keep repeating the same point using different words, and don�t just say the same thing in several different ways.

12. Be more or less specific.

13. Subtlety is by far the greatest thing ever.

14. One-word sentences? Eliminate.

15. Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.

16. The passive voice is to be avoided.

17. Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.

18. Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.

19. Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.

20. Who needs rhetorical questions?

To which I add:

I think you should never start a simple sentence with "because". Because it is a rule.

I have found if possible try not to use too many compound sentences in a row and try to vary the pace by using simple sentences between your compound sentences. I know this is good practise because too many compound sentences in a row makes it difficult for your reader to follow what you are saying and the reader quickly becomes tired of reading long sentences. In sum, many compound sentences in a row, even if grammatically correct, slows the pace of your text and causes the reader to lose interest. As well, remember that a sentence does not imply "forget everything you read now and move on to the next sentence," ergo you don't have to connect your sentences together with conjunctions to tell the reader sentence two has some passing relation to the principles outlined in sentence one.

I've discovered its a good idea to double check your use of "it's" and "its".

I think if you want to look like a 12-year old... who learned how to write on Myspace ... then ... by all means ... use a lot of ellipses in your sentences...

I truly think god loves Canadians more than Americans because we spell colour with a "U". However, make sure you are consistent and simply don't favor the few Canadian spellings you used while doing your BA at a Canadian college. If you mix American and Canadian spellings it will be humorous to your Canadian reader. There are some gray areas, of course.

I think I might come across as a grammer nazi but the best way to improve the writing of a person is to flame them when they use bad grammer.

When writing in the first person, don't begin every sentence with "I".

Ad yours.

[Underwaterbob]

Don't use no double negatives.

[Bigfeet]

I'm going to assume the title was a joke.

[peppermint]

I've noticed a lot of exclamation mark abuse from male posters lately. I think they're shooting for a written version of 'roided out wrestler, but it often seems more like it was written by a shrill pre-teen girl.

Oh, and if you're planning to critique or comment on others writing, take the time to spell-check your own posts. ( psst! Grammar has an "a")

[Omkara]

Make sentences, or any missive, letter, essay or composition, which you would organize syntactically in order to convey you innermost thoughts and opinions, and which you would like people to both read and to understand, as simple as you, or anyone else for that matter, are able to make them.

All other rules are superfluous.

(Okham's razor, baby!)

By the way, what is the OP's interest in writing?

[Kimchi Cowboy]

WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO SAY JUST ISN'T INTERESTING OR IMPORTANT ENOUGH TO WARRANT YOU SHOUTING IT OUT IN ALLCAPS!

[Omkara]

[Omkara]

It is better to break writing into too many paragraphs than too few.

I don't know how many times I skip a post because of long paragraphs that make my eyes cross.

[ernie]

from orwell's "politics and the english language":

(i) Never use a metaphor, simile, or other figure of speech which you are used to seeing in print.

(ii) Never use a long word where a short one will do.

(iii) If it is possible to cut a word out, always cut it out.

(iv) Never use the passive where you can use the active.

(v) Never use a foreign phrase, a scientific word, or a jargon word if you can think of an everyday English equivalent.

(vi) Break any of these rules sooner than say anything outright barbarous.

[Kimchi Cowboy]

It's strange how nobody has mentioned our good friend the "Enter" key, or in other words, how to use paragraphs. We have all seen too often on this site some post that goes on and on and on without end, rambling from one subject to the next, without a paragraph break. Simply hitting the "Enter" key twice adds a vital space, breaking up a massive block of continuous text into manageable, eye-pleasing chunks. This makes the entire post easier to read, and let's be honest here; how many people actually try to sift through and READ one of those monster paragraphs anyway? I certainly don't! No matter how interesting the subject may be, I simply get too annoyed - and yes, offended - at the poster's insensitivity to his / her reader. Writing your 453 (or more) word thesis in a single paragraph is the literary equivalent of going to a dinner party and having to sit next to that one colleague or acquaintance we all have, you know the type, the one who talks and talks and talks without stopping, asking question after question after question, on and on and on without end, and barely waits for you to answer one question before going on to the next! You know who I mean, right? Have you ever been stuck next to a person with a terminal case of verbal diarrhea like that? Wouldn't you rather stick a fork in your eye than have to put up with that for a couple of hours? Anyway, when it comes to writing it's an evil and nasty habit which must be avoided at all costs. After all, it's just one more key on your pad to hit; how many other keys have you already hit during the composition of your manifesto? Maybe the keyboard designer people should start putting the "Enter" key in the middle of the keypad; that way, your typical rambling-nonsense poster might actually hit it by accident, giving welcome relief to other netizens, and at least trebling the chances that someone will actually read the damn thing! Well that's about it for me on this subject. To summarize, get to know your "Enter" key. Find in on your keyboard (it's over there on the right side, just under your right pinky finger. Say, have you ever wondered why they call it a "pinky"?) Get to know it (the "Enter" key, not your pinky; but USE your pinky to hit "Enter"). Stroke it a little. Learn how it feels when you press it. Then press it more. By following this simple piece of advice, you will avoid incurring the wrath of your fellow netizens and more importantly, people will actually read your drivel!

[mindmetoo]

[Big_Bird]

[runlikegump]

Unless you are three years old , have the mental age of three , are a total tool , are too cool for school , or are from a planet where such nuance doesn't exist , never use emoticons

[xtchr]

Ha, great OP.

The fact that you put a question mark at the end of a sentence doesn't make it a question? Or does it! I really hate this? For some reason I find it really annoying? I wish people wouldn't do it?

[JustJohn]