|
Korean Job Discussion Forums
"The Internet's Meeting Place for ESL/EFL Teachers from Around the World!"
|
| View previous topic :: View next topic |
| Author |
Message |
fiveeagles
Joined: 19 May 2005
Location: Vancouver
|
 Posted: Sun Jun 15, 2008 10:40 pm Post subject: |
 |
|
I believe there are three things that make a good relationship, a beautiful marriage. This three fold chord is powerful and binding in love. One part is unbreakable.
The first ingredient is "chemistry". Marriage is a joining of lives. Two people will become one. If two people are to be brought together there must be an attraction, a chemistry of lives. There should be a drawing together spirit, soul, and body. Chemistry is that first spark that can lead to the sacred fire of marriage. It is an indefinable energy. It should be there. There should be a spark in spirit, soul, and body. The heart should be warmed. Chemistry is not enough though, however important it is. Many people who are drawn together by a mysterious "chemistry" are not truly compatible. The chemistry fades or is put out by other conflicts and incompatibilities.
The second ingredient in marriage is to be "compatible". In the beginning Adam and Eve were made "compatible" for each other. If two are to become one they must fit well together or instead of compatibility there will be endless conflict. To many enter into marriage without first seeing if there is real compatibility. Spirit, soul, and body are meant to become one in marriage. Are you spiritual goals compatible? Do you believe the same about God and your worldview? Are you souls compatible? Do you both share your heart and soul with each other? Are your dreams of life and family, your deep soul desires compatible? Do you support each others personality? Are you "soul friends"? What about your body compatibiltiy? Do you have similar views of sexual intimacy? Do you live to satisy each others desires as well as being satisfied? All these things are part of "compatibility". Many enter into a relationship because of "chemistry" and yet have no compatibility. The marriage often sadly fails. To many marriages are spent trying to change one another rather than "complement" and "complete" each other.
The last ingredient in marriage is, in my view, the most important. It will hold when others fail. It is "covenant". In marriage there is chemistry, compatibility, and covenant, and the greatest of these is covenant. Covenant is committed love, sacred and sacrificial. It is unconditional and undying. Chemistry and compatibility can fade and fail, but covenant love will hold. It is what took Christ to the Cross for His bride. When Christ was being rejected and abandoned in the darkness one thing held. It was not chemistry or compatiblity. It was covenant love. He had pledged Himself to His bride. There was no chemistry at the Cross. He was not feeling loved. There was no compatibilty as the Perfect One gave Himself for a world so unlike Him. All there was in the darkness was eternal, unconditional, dying love. Christ's love was covenant love. He had pledged Himself from eternity. He had committed Himself in the garden. The Cross is still the greatest symbol of love. It speaks of sacrifice and suffering. It speaks of grace and forgiveness. It speaks love, always love. It is what we need the most in marriage. All three are important. Covenant love is immortal, an unyielding fire, stronger than death. It is God's love. It is what we need.
One of my friends wrote this. |
|
| Back to top |
|
 |
Stevie_B
Joined: 14 May 2008
|
| Posted: Sun Jun 15, 2008 10:43 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| fiveeagles wrote: |
I believe there are three things that make a good relationship, a beautiful marriage. This three fold chord is powerful and binding in love. One part is unbreakable.
The first ingredient is "chemistry". Marriage is a joining of lives. Two people will become one. If two people are to be brought together there must be an attraction, a chemistry of lives. There should be a drawing together spirit, soul, and body. Chemistry is that first spark that can lead to the sacred fire of marriage. It is an indefinable energy. It should be there. There should be a spark in spirit, soul, and body. The heart should be warmed. Chemistry is not enough though, however important it is. Many people who are drawn together by a mysterious "chemistry" are not truly compatible. The chemistry fades or is put out by other conflicts and incompatibilities.
The second ingredient in marriage is to be "compatible". In the beginning Adam and Eve were made "compatible" for each other. If two are to become one they must fit well together or instead of compatibility there will be endless conflict. To many enter into marriage without first seeing if there is real compatibility. Spirit, soul, and body are meant to become one in marriage. Are you spiritual goals compatible? Do you believe the same about God and your worldview? Are you souls compatible? Do you both share your heart and soul with each other? Are your dreams of life and family, your deep soul desires compatible? Do you support each others personality? Are you "soul friends"? What about your body compatibiltiy? Do you have similar views of sexual intimacy? Do you live to satisy each others desires as well as being satisfied? All these things are part of "compatibility". Many enter into a relationship because of "chemistry" and yet have no compatibility. The marriage often sadly fails. To many marriages are spent trying to change one another rather than "complement" and "complete" each other.
The last ingredient in marriage is, in my view, the most important. It will hold when others fail. It is "covenant". In marriage there is chemistry, compatibility, and covenant, and the greatest of these is covenant. Covenant is committed love, sacred and sacrificial. It is unconditional and undying. Chemistry and compatibility can fade and fail, but covenant love will hold. It is what took Christ to the Cross for His bride. When Christ was being rejected and abandoned in the darkness one thing held. It was not chemistry or compatiblity. It was covenant love. He had pledged Himself to His bride. There was no chemistry at the Cross. He was not feeling loved. There was no compatibilty as the Perfect One gave Himself for a world so unlike Him. All there was in the darkness was eternal, unconditional, dying love. Christ's love was covenant love. He had pledged Himself from eternity. He had committed Himself in the garden. The Cross is still the greatest symbol of love. It speaks of sacrifice and suffering. It speaks of grace and forgiveness. It speaks love, always love. It is what we need the most in marriage. All three are important. Covenant love is immortal, an unyielding fire, stronger than death. It is God's love. It is what we need.
One of my friends wrote this. |
Bollocks. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
fiveeagles
Joined: 19 May 2005
Location: Vancouver
|
| Posted: Sun Jun 15, 2008 10:46 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| Stevie_B wrote: |
| fiveeagles wrote: |
I believe there are three things that make a good relationship, a beautiful marriage. This three fold chord is powerful and binding in love. One part is unbreakable.
The first ingredient is "chemistry". Marriage is a joining of lives. Two people will become one. If two people are to be brought together there must be an attraction, a chemistry of lives. There should be a drawing together spirit, soul, and body. Chemistry is that first spark that can lead to the sacred fire of marriage. It is an indefinable energy. It should be there. There should be a spark in spirit, soul, and body. The heart should be warmed. Chemistry is not enough though, however important it is. Many people who are drawn together by a mysterious "chemistry" are not truly compatible. The chemistry fades or is put out by other conflicts and incompatibilities.
The second ingredient in marriage is to be "compatible". In the beginning Adam and Eve were made "compatible" for each other. If two are to become one they must fit well together or instead of compatibility there will be endless conflict. To many enter into marriage without first seeing if there is real compatibility. Spirit, soul, and body are meant to become one in marriage. Are you spiritual goals compatible? Do you believe the same about God and your worldview? Are you souls compatible? Do you both share your heart and soul with each other? Are your dreams of life and family, your deep soul desires compatible? Do you support each others personality? Are you "soul friends"? What about your body compatibiltiy? Do you have similar views of sexual intimacy? Do you live to satisy each others desires as well as being satisfied? All these things are part of "compatibility". Many enter into a relationship because of "chemistry" and yet have no compatibility. The marriage often sadly fails. To many marriages are spent trying to change one another rather than "complement" and "complete" each other.
The last ingredient in marriage is, in my view, the most important. It will hold when others fail. It is "covenant". In marriage there is chemistry, compatibility, and covenant, and the greatest of these is covenant. Covenant is committed love, sacred and sacrificial. It is unconditional and undying. Chemistry and compatibility can fade and fail, but covenant love will hold. It is what took Christ to the Cross for His bride. When Christ was being rejected and abandoned in the darkness one thing held. It was not chemistry or compatiblity. It was covenant love. He had pledged Himself to His bride. There was no chemistry at the Cross. He was not feeling loved. There was no compatibilty as the Perfect One gave Himself for a world so unlike Him. All there was in the darkness was eternal, unconditional, dying love. Christ's love was covenant love. He had pledged Himself from eternity. He had committed Himself in the garden. The Cross is still the greatest symbol of love. It speaks of sacrifice and suffering. It speaks of grace and forgiveness. It speaks love, always love. It is what we need the most in marriage. All three are important. Covenant love is immortal, an unyielding fire, stronger than death. It is God's love. It is what we need.
One of my friends wrote this. |
Bollocks. |
Show me a great love than Christ dying for you and me and if you can I will give up my faith.
Marriage is meant to symbolize the love that Christ showed us. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
nateium
Joined: 21 Aug 2006
Location: Seoul
|
| Posted: Sun Jun 15, 2008 10:53 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| Atavistic wrote: |
Well, for those of us in love with foreign nationals it makes a hell of a lot of sense to get on a more permanent visa.
I feel for a gay friend of mine who fell in love with a Korean. They got him to the States on a visitor visa, then a short-term English study visa, then a real student visa, but what happens in two years when he's done with school? Yes some dude can buy a mail-order bride, meet her only one, drag her over and marry her and she can stay (doing the appropriate visa work along the way). That's bullshit. |
Move to Massachusetts? (or California?)
Not sure how gay marriage works with foreign nationals. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Stevie_B
Joined: 14 May 2008
|
| Posted: Sun Jun 15, 2008 11:49 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| fiveeagles wrote: |
| Stevie_B wrote: |
| fiveeagles wrote: |
I believe there are three things that make a good relationship, a beautiful marriage. This three fold chord is powerful and binding in love. One part is unbreakable.
The first ingredient is "chemistry". Marriage is a joining of lives. Two people will become one. If two people are to be brought together there must be an attraction, a chemistry of lives. There should be a drawing together spirit, soul, and body. Chemistry is that first spark that can lead to the sacred fire of marriage. It is an indefinable energy. It should be there. There should be a spark in spirit, soul, and body. The heart should be warmed. Chemistry is not enough though, however important it is. Many people who are drawn together by a mysterious "chemistry" are not truly compatible. The chemistry fades or is put out by other conflicts and incompatibilities.
The second ingredient in marriage is to be "compatible". In the beginning Adam and Eve were made "compatible" for each other. If two are to become one they must fit well together or instead of compatibility there will be endless conflict. To many enter into marriage without first seeing if there is real compatibility. Spirit, soul, and body are meant to become one in marriage. Are you spiritual goals compatible? Do you believe the same about God and your worldview? Are you souls compatible? Do you both share your heart and soul with each other? Are your dreams of life and family, your deep soul desires compatible? Do you support each others personality? Are you "soul friends"? What about your body compatibiltiy? Do you have similar views of sexual intimacy? Do you live to satisy each others desires as well as being satisfied? All these things are part of "compatibility". Many enter into a relationship because of "chemistry" and yet have no compatibility. The marriage often sadly fails. To many marriages are spent trying to change one another rather than "complement" and "complete" each other.
The last ingredient in marriage is, in my view, the most important. It will hold when others fail. It is "covenant". In marriage there is chemistry, compatibility, and covenant, and the greatest of these is covenant. Covenant is committed love, sacred and sacrificial. It is unconditional and undying. Chemistry and compatibility can fade and fail, but covenant love will hold. It is what took Christ to the Cross for His bride. When Christ was being rejected and abandoned in the darkness one thing held. It was not chemistry or compatiblity. It was covenant love. He had pledged Himself to His bride. There was no chemistry at the Cross. He was not feeling loved. There was no compatibilty as the Perfect One gave Himself for a world so unlike Him. All there was in the darkness was eternal, unconditional, dying love. Christ's love was covenant love. He had pledged Himself from eternity. He had committed Himself in the garden. The Cross is still the greatest symbol of love. It speaks of sacrifice and suffering. It speaks of grace and forgiveness. It speaks love, always love. It is what we need the most in marriage. All three are important. Covenant love is immortal, an unyielding fire, stronger than death. It is God's love. It is what we need.
One of my friends wrote this. |
Bollocks. |
Show me a great love than Christ dying for you and me and if you can I will give up my faith.
Marriage is meant to symbolize the love that Christ showed us. |
To air an aged sentiment, 'Jesus died for his own sins, not mine.' |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Underwaterbob
Joined: 08 Jan 2005
Location: In Cognito
|
| Posted: Mon Jun 16, 2008 12:01 am Post subject: |
|
|
| To appease parents. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
bogey666
Joined: 17 Mar 2008
Location: Korea, the ass free zone
|
| Posted: Mon Jun 16, 2008 12:54 am Post subject: |
|
|
| Quote: |
The second ingredient in marriage is to be "compatible". In the beginning Adam and Eve were made "compatible" for each other. |
yes, they were "compatible" for each other in the sense that Adam's *beep* fit into her vagina... and it only cost him one rib" (he didn't know about the lifetime of nagging to follow, only of coital bliss)
(btw. why is p.e.n.i.s. beeped and vagina is not? )
today's compatibility is a different matter. Furthermore, people that are compatible at certain points in their lives, are NOT compatible in other points of their lives. Hence the idea of "till death do us part" is pure baloney. (for most people) (and was baloney is many ancient societies where people were instructed to divorce and remarry if this suited the family's political or commercial purposes)
btw.. "to please parents"??
hahahaha... I wonder how many people have fallen into THIS stupid trap?
I had my one major war with my parents when I changed majors in college and I made it eminently clear that my life is my own and I shall live it the way I (underline I) want to.
haven't had any parental issues since.  |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Rae
Joined: 10 Oct 2007
|
| Posted: Mon Jun 16, 2008 1:21 am Post subject: |
|
|
| dtown wrote: |
| bogey666 wrote: |
| Rae wrote: |
| Atavistic wrote: |
| Rae wrote: |
| If there's no plans for children, there's no reason for anyone to marry, IMO. |
I'm repeating myself, I know.
Well, for those of us in love with foreign nationals it makes a hell of a lot of sense to get on a more permanent visa. |
OK, I stand corrected ... to be closer to your loved one is probably the most important factor for marriage. Aww it's so nice to hear people in love |
"Closer" to your loved one?
Hmm.. how so? because of some ceremony, and then with the legal obligations (aka pay me pay me, in case of divorce) that come with it?
seems to me Kurt Russell and Goldie Hawn have been "loved ones" far longer than most of their Hollywood brethren (and indeed real life "loved ones) without all the bullshit. |
I took the meaning of 'closer' as proximity-wise? Like you need to marry so your spouse can get a visa so you can live in the same country which is closer than living in two different countries. But that is just my interpretation. |
That's what I meant. Atavistic's post made me realize what I missed in my initial rant. But I should backtrack anyway (in case the sweetest bf in the world were to see this): what does marriage mean to me?
Marriage means trust, conformity, the reality that we need someone else to simply be, and building a home and filling it with warmth for a new generation (or not). Notice I didn't say love. I feel that love stands by its own, contract or not.
Personally, I think marriage is for baby making and raising. If you one day want a family, then it's only natural to try and build a home for the lil munchkins. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Justin Hale
Joined: 24 Nov 2007
Location: the Straight Talk Express
|
| Posted: Mon Jun 16, 2008 2:24 am Post subject: |
|
|
| Kuros wrote: |
What do you know about raising children? Seriously, isn't one of your pet projects ranting about how we need to reproduce as a society? You need to have at least two people to raise a child: one person can provide the income and the attention necessary, but its extremely stressful.
I can't believe this is something that has to be argued. This isn't about reinforcing sexist roles. This isn't about a defense of marriage. This is about the logistics of having children. Until the government takes it upon itself to fully raise your children, its a good idea to get married. |
The subject under discussion is marriage. Above you've managed to state the stunningly obvious (that it takes two to produce and raise a child) but nothing in the way of a comprehensible defence of the importance and relevance of marriage for today's society. Your original vague assertion was "marriage is about the children" and yet clearly marriage is totally peripheral in any definition of good parenting. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
mindmetoo
Joined: 02 Feb 2004
|
| Posted: Mon Jun 16, 2008 3:04 am Post subject: |
|
|
| Stevie_B wrote: |
Bollocks. |
In the 21st century, fiveeagles believes there are real witches and they're killing people with magic. And he thinks people can make gems appear out of no where using god magic. And he thinks the world and universe is only 6,000 years old.
Yes. Bollocks indeed. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
mindmetoo
Joined: 02 Feb 2004
|
| Posted: Mon Jun 16, 2008 3:06 am Post subject: |
|
|
| fiveeagles wrote: |
| Show me a great love than Christ dying for you and me and if you can I will give up my faith. |
Show me he really died this way. Because I also have a book that says Zeus did a lot of crazy things for love too. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Atavistic
Joined: 22 May 2006
Location: How totally stupid that Korean doesn't show in this area.
|
| Posted: Mon Jun 16, 2008 4:51 am Post subject: |
|
|
| bogey666 wrote: |
| Rae wrote: |
| Atavistic wrote: |
| Rae wrote: |
| If there's no plans for children, there's no reason for anyone to marry, IMO. |
I'm repeating myself, I know.
Well, for those of us in love with foreign nationals it makes a hell of a lot of sense to get on a more permanent visa. |
OK, I stand corrected ... to be closer to your loved one is probably the most important factor for marriage. Aww it's so nice to hear people in love |
"Closer" to your loved one?
Hmm.. how so? because of some ceremony, and then with the legal obligations (aka pay me pay me, in case of divorce) that come with it?
seems to me Kurt Russell and Goldie Hawn have been "loved ones" far longer than most of their Hollywood brethren (and indeed real life "loved ones) without all the bullshit. |
Raise your hand if you're surprised that Bogey missed the point. Again. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Atavistic
Joined: 22 May 2006
Location: How totally stupid that Korean doesn't show in this area.
|
| Posted: Mon Jun 16, 2008 5:01 am Post subject: |
|
|
| nateium wrote: |
| Atavistic wrote: |
Well, for those of us in love with foreign nationals it makes a hell of a lot of sense to get on a more permanent visa.
I feel for a gay friend of mine who fell in love with a Korean. They got him to the States on a visitor visa, then a short-term English study visa, then a real student visa, but what happens in two years when he's done with school? Yes some dude can buy a mail-order bride, meet her only one, drag her over and marry her and she can stay (doing the appropriate visa work along the way). That's bullshit. |
Move to Massachusetts? (or California?)
Not sure how gay marriage works with foreign nationals. |
It doesn't.
Immigration is done at a federal level, not a state level. Hell, DOMA (Defense of Marriage Act) makes it a federal requirement that GAY marriages, partnerships, unions at a state level are not recognized at a federal level. In fact, if you do get married in one of those states and you're on a non-immigrant visa, they can go after you for having immigrant intent (kick you out of the country, put a bar for reentry on your passport, etc), even though the marriage isn't recognized by immigration!! A bullshit catch-22.
http://news.newamericamedia.org/news/view_article.html?article_id=118144404692f5aa29a174af626dd113&from=rss |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
fiveeagles
Joined: 19 May 2005
Location: Vancouver
|
| Posted: Mon Jun 16, 2008 8:41 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| mindmetoo wrote: |
| fiveeagles wrote: |
| Show me a great love than Christ dying for you and me and if you can I will give up my faith. |
Show me he really died this way. Because I also have a book that says Zeus did a lot of crazy things for love too. |
Tell me a better story. There is no greater story. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Kuros
Joined: 27 Apr 2004
|
| Posted: Mon Jun 16, 2008 8:49 pm Post subject: |
|
|
| Justin Hale wrote: |
| Kuros wrote: |
What do you know about raising children? Seriously, isn't one of your pet projects ranting about how we need to reproduce as a society? You need to have at least two people to raise a child: one person can provide the income and the attention necessary, but its extremely stressful.
I can't believe this is something that has to be argued. This isn't about reinforcing sexist roles. This isn't about a defense of marriage. This is about the logistics of having children. Until the government takes it upon itself to fully raise your children, its a good idea to get married. |
The subject under discussion is marriage. Above you've managed to state the stunningly obvious (that it takes two to produce and raise a child) but nothing in the way of a comprehensible defence of the importance and relevance of marriage for today's society. Your original vague assertion was "marriage is about the children" and yet clearly marriage is totally peripheral in any definition of good parenting. |
As usual, you are trying your very best to misunderstand your interlocutor.
No, being married eo ipso doesn't make you a good parent. But its the most common and efficient foundation upon which to become a good parent. The opinions of amateur culture warriors be damned.
Mine wasn't the first post to indentify children as the final cause of marriage. And it wasn't the last. |
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
|
|
FAQ
Search
Memberlist
Usergroups
Register
Profile
Log in to check your private messages
Log in
