Korean Job Discussion Forums

[Chamchiman]

I teach fifth and sixth grade elementary kids. We have a three-strike system and when they get three, they have to come to the English classroom at lunch time and do push-ups and read books (thus missing their soccer game, and as a bonus result, cutting down on footsmell in fifth period). Some of the kids are really pissed when my co-teacher or I give out to them, but the next day they're all smiles with me again. Last week I even had a kid who I had really given the gears to give me a chocolate bar at the bus stop! Big smiles and a "See you tomorrow teacher!"

Do your kids hold grudges? Mine don't. (I don't have much experience with middle- or high-school kids, so how about them?) It was a long time ago so I don't really remember, but I'm pretty sure I did when I was a kid; if there was a teacher that the kids didn't like, he or she was going to have a tough time getting back into our good books.

What is it about these kids?

[Easter Clark]

I had a (pretty smart) student who was really gung-ho about my class, until I yelled at her best friend for having not one, but two cell phones, after I told her once to put them away--then I confiscated them and turned them in to the discipline department.

Suddenly she was the most miserable little girl you've ever seen! I honestly don't understand how someone can wear a frown for an entire hour every class. This was about a month ago and she's only now starting to get back to her former enthusiastic self. So in my case, yeah, some students hold grudges.

But you can't constantly worry about how much the students like you. I mean, it's good to be personable but you shouldn't be afraid of making a few enemies.

[Kikomom]

I would think that it depends on their ability to rationalize the fairness of the situation.

The enthusiastic girl couldn't do this. Besides being smart she must be a brat and the cell phone means more to her than being in class or respecting the rights of others. One of those phones must have been her's and she was going to be in trouble for losing it. She felt it was unfair that it was taken not from her, but from her friend who ended up getting her in trouble. Instead of being angry with herself or her friend, she decided to hate being in class, displaying a misplaced sense of justice.

Boys like to push the envelope to see what they can get away with and punishment is just anther time waster to them. But either way, they're enjoying their time so holding a grudge probably doesn't even cross their mind.

That's my take.

[aarontendo]

Girls are more vindictive than men in general.

[Draz]

Or depends on how fair they think you're being. Only one warning, then the phones weren't only confiscated until the end of class, but handed off to someone else for more punishment? That's a little harsh.

[Fishead soup]

Having students like you is not important. They have to respect you.
If you show any weakness your students will eat you alive. You'd be surprised the acts of kindness I've recieved from students whom I made cry.
It's not like Canada where a family will sue you for emotional damage if you take away Johny's plastic Alligator. Unless you work for Wonderland.

[Dome Vans]

Kids are different from one day to next. In some cases it's the teacher that has to learn to not hold the grudge or fly off the handle with a student at the slightest problem.

I have a friend who told his best student off once for standing up and punching another student. She didn't talk to my friend for two weeks. This student however goes from school to the Hagwon and gets home at 11pm. She goes to the Hagwon on Saturday and Sunday too. I'd be a bit f*ed off if I had school every day.

[EricaSmile84]

Out of 650 girls, I have only one devil. When she is not giving me death stares, she is completely ignoring my lesson. The weird thing is that I've never really punished her more than anyone else that was disruptive. This has been going on since April. She reminds me of a tazmanian devil.

[Fishead soup]

Most of us come across as push overs in comparison to our Korean counterparts. I woudn't waste time worrying about hurting someones feelings. I think many of us are actually too soft. Some of the Korean students actually view time with us as time off.

[sojourner1]

I definitely see an enormous environmental difference between hagwons and public schools. I must say the public school environment is a much more positive experience for me, so far. The students just don't act so negative in PS like they did in hagwon which is understable as PS is the central core of their life while the hagwon is a dreaded cram school.

I don't see much negativity, grudges, and unhappiness where I'm at and look to keep it that way. The Korean teachers do provide decent support while letting me do all the teaching, but also provide some translations, and will handle any misbehavior that requires discilpline. This might include standing with knees bent all the way position with their back to the wall for 5 minutes. I didn't know exactly why it happened, but I know a student said something in Korean that didn't settle well with the Korean teacher sitting in back. If you've ever done this, you know it's painful, but not harmful.

And last, grudges are easily snuffed out if you don't fuel the fire and you just focus on the majority while ignoring a single one with negative behavior. Ignoring is my best discilpline measure as when a kid is acting up, he or she is looking for attention and demanding you to treat him or her special above the rest. This is a narcisistic personality in the student who holds a grudge if you don't play favorites.

[Easter Clark]

[Kikomom]

Ah oh... This may be the problem then:

[pkang0202]

In my experience, the girls hold grudges. The boys shrug it off like nothing.

[Easter Clark]

[VirginIslander]