Korean Job Discussion Forums

sojourner1 · Posted: Sat Oct 11, 2008 9:09 pm Post subject: Homesickness and Nostalgia?

Do you long and wish to be home, if only for a day? Do you long to just go shopping for a day in your home country just so you can chat it up with people you can relate with? Do you long to be with your relatives just for a day? Do you long to be doing your favorite activities like you used to do? Do you long to have a day with your best friends? Do you long to just be there for a day to handle your business matters and catch up on things? Does it get you down to stay up late to phone home only to find no one is answering or they're too busy to talk, because it's still early in the morning for them?

These sorts of thoughts and feelings are so real for me when it comes to living in Asia or staying away just too long. I feel 1 year trips to teach are simply too long and should be remunerated with a RT air once every 6 months with the last 2 weeks of December and 1st week of January off. There's 2 times I love to go home which are Summer and Christmas. 3 to 6 month tours would be ideal for working abroad. Most engineers and business professionals rotate every 1 to 3 months with intermittent trips home between assignments. My very 1st international trip lasted 2 years and 4 months, but it was in Germany living with other Americans and having supports while serving in the US Army. We had it all. Great food and friends and plenty of English speaking people to help us along through life. I didn't feel one bit homesick and had the time of my life while in Europe. Those were the days. Out here in Korea, you're on your own all by yourself.

It can help if your folks send care packages including pictures and other things from home and tell you about in detail the happenings back home. While I have always sent pictures, cards, and gifts home during my sojourns, I've never been able to bring them to understand what it is I endure and how I so need this support so they don't send me things or understand. Most teachers I've known do indeed get things sent from home and have close relatives. Me, I'm having trouble just getting my mail, including my economic stimulus check as well as my last check from a temporary job at home.

I could go home in January for 3 weeks, but I wanted to travel to the tropics like down to Guam and Bali. I know January is a terrible time to go home as it's cold and everyone are broke, depressed, and back to work after the holidays. It's a great time to go shopping though. I'd rather do the last 2 weeks of December at home. I went home last Spring and found I was not welcomed as much as I had hoped for due to them already having grieved over loss of a relative. When I left for so long before, they grieved as if I had died, expecting something would happen to me and then weren't as warm ever again when visiting home. This pains me.

Going home to me now is anywhere in a western country, be it America or Europe with America being more so. Now I'm an adult, I can repatriate anywhere in America and be home since it's all so familiar to me, but prefer a warmer climate. English speaking, great BBQ, great fishing, great hiking, great camping, great coffee shops, etc. Just gotta find a great job to make it work out which is the big problem.

How do you cope with homesickness and nostalgia for home and the good ol' days? I download movies and shows to watch on my computer and read American websites like MSN as well as cooking myself something delicious although those aren't gourmet potatoes here, because they don't brown up or fry very well.

Whirlwind · Joined: 03 Jun 2005

I absolutely agree with you, Sojourner. I just miss the slower pace of things back home. I feel that I can breathe there. Korea is just so uptight. There is just a lot of tension wherever you go(walking around, shopping,etc). Like you, I miss the shopping and products back home. My biggies that I miss are Sobe, Red Baron pizzas and chocolate cake(real chocolate cake, not the dried dull kind available in Korea). Thankfully, my contract finishes fairly soon and I'll be making a trip to the supermarket soon.

Ya-ta Boy · Joined: 16 Jan 2003 Location: Established in 1994

mee · Joined: 08 Sep 2007

i'm a gyopo as they would call it and i've been feeling isolated since i've been here and there are many things i already miss (mainly because it's easier to understand and get around, you already know and are familiar, you don't feel powerless)BUT it's not all of america. I just miss hawaii which is totally different from anywhere else in america. It truly is multicultural and a beautiful place with lots of asians of every ethnicity and other international people.

To me that feels like my home, has all the conveniences i'm used to but has the entire world there too. It's for a real intercontinental type person and i meet many open-minded friendly people there from all races and backgrounds. That's why they come and end up staying which is great!

Do I miss america as in america generally? Hell No! I would rather live in Seoul (as much as it isn't my exact style) over lots of places in america any day. For instance, alabama can kiss my ass. So can all those really cold states and most of the south. LOL. Well, most of the mainland.

I'm attracted to the unusual like alaska, hawaii and such.

Whirlwind · Joined: 03 Jun 2005

I think the tension comes from the Korean side. They are just so uncomfortable in dealing with foreigners, and it shows. You are correct that the language barrier and culture do contribute, but they just get so freaked out when having to deal with a non-Korean that is contributes mightily

schwa · Joined: 18 Jan 2003 Location: Yap

No longing here for water under the bridge.

I dont really distinguish between Koreans & foreigners -- all simply people in my take on things. I dont miss the banalities of overheard conversation or easy english with checkout clerks. Fun when it happens on vacation but not important in the big scheme. No necessary commodities glaringly absent.

Life in Korea is real & frequently pleasant. I'm happy to call it home.

Ya-ta Boy · Joined: 16 Jan 2003 Location: Established in 1994

travelingfool · Joined: 10 Mar 2008 Location: Parents' basement

It's quite normal to wax nostalgic for our home countries, oftentimes remembering the good while forgetting the reasons why we left in the first place. That being said, there is no denying that Korea is a big pressure cooker. It's not a happy place and most Koreans will admit that with a little prodding. Just look at the large diaspora of Koreans around the world. If you have any kind of sixth sense at all, you will feel this kind of heaviness that hovers over this place. I am really glad to be going home and even though my country has its problems, it's just that, my country. I don't like living life as an outsider which is all we will ever be here. Living abroad in general has taught me the importance of family relationships and being connected in a community. What I don't get is why the foreign teacher community here is so fragmented. It seems like this place just grinds people down and makes them anti social. I have seen what I am pretty sure are foreign teachers who look pretty unhappy.

NaD00D00 · Joined: 10 Oct 2008 Location: Gimpo

I couldn't wait to get away from where I live in America. This is my first month here, but I'm half Korean, and I've lived here before, so I don't think it's just the honeymoon stage or anything.

The only thing that would make living here perfect would include being fluent in Korean and having a couple of my close buddies around. That's the only thing I really get nostalgic about. Hopefully that'll change when I start meeting new people.

I don't know if I quite agree with the whole "Korea is not a happy place" statement. But like I said, I've only been here a month...

Whirlwind · Joined: 03 Jun 2005

When you've stayed in Korea for four or five years, get back to us. I certainly do not have any illusions about home. Things are bad there as well, no doubt about it. Perhaps I'll stay, perhaps I'll come back to the ROK. I guess I just need a break from the place for a bit. I've stated before that I'm grateful for everything that I've been able to do in Korea. I'm definitely thankful. But I agree that home isn't a paradise, not by a long shot.

aka Dave · Joined: 02 May 2008 Location: Down by the river

I used to miss football, both college and pro, but I figured out where to how to get it efficiently on the net and am loving that (watching a game right now).

I miss a lot of different foods (number one: authentic parmegianno regianno chese. You cfannot make Italian food without it).
But I eat healthier here so that's really a push.

The only things i miss are the Southern California climate, the beach, and good ski resorts like Mammoth that have lots of vertical runs.

Overall, I really like my job and the people I teach and work with. Korea itself is hit and miss, but that really isn't as important to me as liking the people I'm surrounded by and having a fulfilling job.

NaD00D00 · Joined: 10 Oct 2008 Location: Gimpo

How do you watch the games?
I have a fantasy team and it's killin me not being able to watch the games. I'm stuck with doing ESPN Gamecasts.
Is there any way you can point me in the right direction (you can PM me)?

I forgot to mention I already miss the girls, though. Not into Asian/Korean women.

aka Dave · Joined: 02 May 2008 Location: Down by the river

I use

http://forums.tenyardtorrents.com/

for college games (watching UT vs. Okla. in HD right now).

For pro I use NFL gamepass where you get all the games at any time in HD. Awesome, but costs 250 dollars. You get nfl torrents from the above site.

Make sure you upload torrents as well or they ban you. Also you have to get Utorrent 1.81.

Start downloading now hehe if you love football. It's so nice to have football back.

EricaSmile84 · Joined: 23 Jan 2008

I cook American food and watch American tv/movies and talk to my people back home. I also go on American fast food websites to see the new promotions they have. Taco Bell, Mcdonalds, BK, Wendys.... it has always excited me (even back home) when new stuff came out. That reminds me... I have some net surfing to do!

ciccone_youth · Joined: 03 Mar 2008 Location: Japan

I got so homesick at the 6-month mark, I didn't think I could finish the year.

But I only have 4 months to go now, and it seems so easy.

I made a lot of new friends, I started cooking foods I liked, and discovered great cafes and restaurants in Seoul, so it makes everything more fun!

I also started reading books again, and once in a while I'll splurge on a magazine from home. I also watch plenty of movies and TV series that remind me of home.

I guess it's different for me since I'm only here for one year, but I can imagine how difficult it gets sometimes when you've been here for a few years without going home. I miss the quietness and the fresh air....