Korean Job Discussion Forums

captain kirk · Joined: 29 Jan 2003

I don't get weepy. Getting angry yes. When in a situation that I'm deciding to think some Korean is playing/toying with me, or talking down, or giving me a run-around, or over-charging. Getting angry isn't a big thing here in Korea. Koreans do it a lot. But when I went to Thailand and encountered 'third world' problems like bad service, bad attitude, milking tourists for money, ripping off tourists, I got 'justifiably angry'. In the manner I would flare up in Korea, where it's a storm, they get what you mean and take your point. But in Thailand the men are MUCH less prone to vent, posture, throw their weight around. In Korea it seems the foreigner is underestimated as a result of national pride, so they 'test' you sometimes to check if you're submissive. In Thailand they think foreigners are a source of income, another will come along after you're gone, and there is very little show of temper. So I quickly found out how displays of anger/frustration just don't go over well there, period. You're likely to get mobbed and robbed. Since I've returned to Korea I haven't done as much 'big-mouthing' to clear obstacles and 'stubborness' as I perceive it. But I see foreigners here big-mouthing their way through obstacles and they look so blown up out of proportion it appears they might pop unless they take a break. I'd rather get angry than weepy by far. You learn from weepiness, maybe, but it feels terrible and there's the risk of depression. Getting angry you clear the way of obstacles and get your way but perhaps run over other people en route. Which gets vicious.
There's always 'being reasonable', I guess (fingers crossed).

Son Deureo! · Joined: 30 Apr 2003

Interesting points you bring up there, Cap'n. And may I say welcome back to Korea.

Anger management is something I'm constantly working on here, especially with regards to dealing with my employers. I have had the tremendous misfortune of having had two very temperamental bosses in the time I've been here. Maybe that's just typical.

The Korean tendency to put your head down and just say "yes, yes" during a boss' temper tantrum is not something that comes naturally to me at all. I ask questions, explain myself, and look to glean positive suggestions or clear answers about the situation. This doesn't seem to work, and as the energy becomes more negative it gets harder for me to remain calm.

I don't get sad, I get angry. But it doesn't seem to remove any obstacles, it only seems to make them worse.

When it comes to dealing with a hogwon owner, there doesn't seem to be any reasonableness to be found.

Real Reality · Joined: 10 Jan 2003 Location: Seoul

Tiberious aka Sparkles,
Here you are.

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/observationalhumor/message/123

So here's an old standby that's related to nothing in this post: "Whatever doesn't kill you, makes you throw up."
http://purlsb4swine.blogspot.com/

"Whatever doesn't kill you makes you skinnier." --Casey, on diarrhea
http://www.angelfire.com/wizard/emillama/Morocco.html

Whatever doesn't kill you makes you loopier.
http://www.xforums.net/Forum2/HTML/000748-10.html

Whatever doesn't kill you makes you bonkers.
http://www.pulp-mag.com/archives/5.05/reviews_film.shtml

Blue Flower · Last edited by Blue Flower on Thu Jan 08, 2004 3:56 am; edited 1 time in total

OiGirl · Joined: 23 Jan 2003 Location: Hoke-y-gun

oldfort · Joined: 09 Oct 2003

Hmmm....my first day here, when I was alone in my apartment, I really wanted to cry and let it all out, but I just couldn't. And then, after the first few days of teaching, when I was still coming to grips with the schedule and students, I wanted a good cry, too, but it still wouldn't come out. I've been here two weeks, I wonder when it'll happen. I hardly cried before, so it'll be interesting to see if that changes while I'm here.

Real Reality · Joined: 10 Jan 2003 Location: Seoul

"hurt my food"

Blue Flower, be careful.

Blue Flower · Posted: Thu Jan 08, 2004 3:57 am Post subject:

katydid · Joined: 02 Feb 2003 Location: Here kitty kitty kitty...

Kimchi Cha Cha · Joined: 15 May 2003 Location: was Suncheon, now Brisbane

I haven't really been weepy yet though during the past month there's been a couple of moments where I thought some tears may come out. I've noticed in the past month that I've developed a lot of less tolerance for the annoying occurances and attitudes that pop up from time to time, and as a result got angry fairly quickly as opposed to earlier on.

Before, I was about as mellow as I've ever been. Very few things fazed me, I got annoyed at times but it brushed over quickly. Now, at times, it's a different story. I'm just trying to find the nice balance where you're mellow and relaxed yet assertive at the same.