Korean Job Discussion Forums

[aboxofchocolates]

Is their a stigma for Korean guys to be seen dating foreign women?

[jammo]

http://forums.eslcafe.com/korea/viewtopic.php?t=142306

[jammo]

http://forums.eslcafe.com/korea/viewtopic.php?t=142306

[bundangbabo]

At the last hagwon I worked at. I had a nice kid in my class who was around 16 years old and I asked him if there were any nice girls in his school and he was like 'no' and I said there were loads of nice English girls who would like him and he said if he walked down the street with an English girl (this was in Changwon) people would give him abuse and would call him a traitor of the Korean race.

[aboxofchocolates]

[theholyinnocent]

Usual disclaimer: I'm in the US, working with Koreans who are here temporarily.

The men I work with and am friendly with often express anxiety or insecurity when we're hanging out alone in public. If a homeless guy asks me for change, or if a construction worker eyes me, or anything, my friends say, "It's because you are a western girl and I'm an Asian guy, right?" They seem to really have a complex about it. Anytime anyone says or does anything strange, they assume that's the reason why. If a salesperson addresses me rather than my friend, I assume it's because I'm the one speaking English fluently, not because the salesperson is emasculating my friend for his Asian-ness. etc.

They seem to be worried about what westerners will think. I have uncovered a few possible reasons for this. Most of them just think it's really uncommon, and that's as far as it goes. They're worried about standing out. Some of them worry that other people will think I'm a prostitute or trophy girlfriend, since they think all westerners assume that no western women would voluntarily date Asian guys.

Oddly, I have only ever encountered reactions from other Asian men. A Korean taxi driver once asked my co-worker where we met, how he became friends with me, if I was embarrassed to be seen with him in public, etc. One time we were in a (real) Chinese restaurant and some young Asian-American guys came in. They were bitching (quite disrespectfully) about women in general, the women they had unsuccessfully dated specifically, and made a really derogatory comment about how girls like me were with guys who barely even speak English (like my co-worker) because "Everyone speaks money."

So I guess in my experience, in a diverse and liberal US city at least, the only people to attach a stigma to the situation are Asian guys. And in that case it seems to me to be a reaction to a perceived stigma, maybe a stigma that existed a couple decades ago but doesn't occur to most people under 40 or 50 these days. I've never seen anyone except Asian men react to the sight of me and an Asian man at all; but I have seen reactions -- curious, positive, or negative -- from Asian men.

[RACETRAITOR]

[Jandar]

Mine fade after Easter.

[Mix1]

[aboxofchocolates]

[aboxofchocolates]