Korean Job Discussion Forums

[kabrams]

Is there a way to get my coworkers to stop touching me? They touch my hair, my skin, my ears, and I don't know how to explain to them that while I don't mind that they're curious, and that they want to touch, that after a while it becomes uncomfortable for me. So far we've all been great together, and I would hate to have this ruin what is a nice friendship.

Today a woman I work with touched my hands and was marveled that my palms are "white" and aren't brown like the rest of my skin, and then began inspecting my fingernails and other parts of my face and body to determine what was the same and different.

I totally lol'd on the inside, but at the same time, it's kind of strange. And my principal likes to parade me around like some weird piece of meat every time he has company. I don't like it, and neither does my co-teacher.

Has anyone dealt with something like this? How did you deal with it?

[Zantetsuken]

You could always touch them...you know...reciprocate and all that baloney.

[phoneboothface]

I thought about going home because of it but then I decided to just accept it / get used to it / avoid it whenever possible.

I either tell them how I feel directly or I just kind of discreetly gtfo.

I think you know how to handle this in general based on the situation so ya...

[climber159]

A friend of mine from Africa told me once that there is a belief held by many Koreans that the "black" (any darker skin) can be rubbed or scrubbed off. This egregious misconception apparently comes from Korean farmers and other outdoor laborers being looked down upon because of their deeply tanned skin as it was a sign that they were poorer. Some of these people would spend hours scrubbing their bodies of the outer layers of skin so they wouldn't stand out amongst the middle and upper class Koreans as much.

You should NOT have to put up with this behavior from them. I'd politely tell them to stop. And, if they don't, start returning the favor (as was previously suggested).

[Surfer Rosa]

I like it when my K-friends groom my hair on the subway. I find this behavior completely straight, they're just showing their concern for my appearance.

[harlowethrombey]

I think I have you beat:

While coming back from my long run 2 sundays ago, I was taking a much-needed walking break towards the end. I had my shirt off and was attempting to tan my lily chest.

A group of older guys were apparently out drinking in the heat, came up to me, wanted to shake hands, etc. A few tried out their English. No problem, it's a common occurence and I usually try to go out of my way to be gregarious so they have a positive experience with a foreign devil.

Then one old guy grabbed and tweaked my right nipple. . .

Yeah.

I was so surprised I didnt do anything except take a step backwards. I've had friends of a decade or more who wouldnt suddenly grab my nip, much less a stranger I had just met.

But, no, I didnt yell at the guy, I guess I was still high off endorphins.

Being white, I dont get the same attention to my skin or hair until the summer time. When my hair begins to turn very bright blonde (its dark brown in the wintertime) I get all kinds of comments and even the students sometimes touching it like my kinders in Japan would.

I guess you should endure the touching, but maybe you could make an off-hand comment to a coworker about how foreigners (not specifically you, but just the general) dont like being touched by people they're not intimate with.

good luck

[typo]

[redaxe]

just say "만지지 마세요."

there's really no way to express that their behavior is inappropriate without embarrassing them, so i think you have to either get used to it or just bite the bullet and calmly say "please stop touching me."

[Joe666]

climber159 wrote:

[Zantetsuken]

[kabrams]

[fermentation]

[ChinaBoy]

hey, I'd touch pretty girls too if I could get away with it!

I'm pretty sure if you started commenting on their eyelids they'd get the hint not to touch you.. just start in on their bodies

[phoneboothface]

Koreans touch me on the subway, not cuz they want to but cuz it's freaking packed with bodies.

[Emeliu]

A lot of korean exchange students are amazed by my blonde hair and arm hair. They have pet me like a dog -.- but I think its interesting a good ice breaker.

Btw, I touch strangers nipples all the time (In America) if they're guys and they have potential for being a good friend. Especially friends. Nothing better than a good ol' purple nurple