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Korean Job Discussion Forums "The Internet's Meeting Place for ESL/EFL Teachers from Around the World!"
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charliebrown84
Joined: 29 Jul 2009 Location: Daegu, South Korea
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Posted: Sun Aug 16, 2009 9:11 am Post subject: |
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Kurtz wrote: |
Just a question, why make an issue of it at all? can't you function in normal society without having to explain your sexuality for no apparent reason? |
Wasn't making an issue of it, just asking a question that I've had pending in the back of my mind. I am more so curious than anything with what kind of reaction I might receive if it does happen.
Thanks to everyone who commented so far, appreciate the advice. |
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indyflyguy
Joined: 17 Apr 2009
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Posted: Sun Aug 16, 2009 1:24 pm Post subject: |
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I also arrive this week and am also concerned about this. I don't plan on discussing it with students, nor do I plan on being a one man Pride parade, but I can't exactly hide it as it's a part of who I am. I guess it's just "proceed with caution"! |
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jlb
Joined: 18 Sep 2003
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Posted: Sun Aug 16, 2009 2:23 pm Post subject: |
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Rules to live by in Korea:
1. It's generally okay to tell foreigners, after you've gotten to know them a bit and see that they aren't one of the crazies.
2. Koreans, generally not okay to tell, unless you become very good friends with them and trust them totally. Also, I wouldn't tell the coworker Koreans, especially if you work at a hagwon or something. Word gets around those places in no time. Gossip is big.
3. Go to the bars and use the online dating sites and don't stress. You can't control everything and have to strike a happy balance between keeping the "secret" and living your life. |
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Elvis Gratton
Joined: 12 Jul 2009
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Posted: Sun Aug 16, 2009 4:38 pm Post subject: |
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You picked the wrong country if you're hoping to be gay and proud and loud about it. But if you keep all knowledge of your lifestyle to foreigners only you should be fine and Koreans likely will never catch on. |
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smoggy
Joined: 31 Jul 2009
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Posted: Tue Aug 18, 2009 5:49 pm Post subject: |
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So, even though I gave you some interesting tidbits about And.....Language School, you are still planning on going? I hope that you don't kick yourself, as everyone said might happen. This is very interesting to me. I'll be arriving in Daegu on the 27th of Aug. My flight kept getting canceled for non-payment of the ticket. I hope that the third time is a charm. In S.K. my e-mail is: [email protected] |
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NYCESOL11211
Joined: 07 Aug 2009
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Posted: Tue Aug 18, 2009 8:46 pm Post subject: |
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the oak llama wrote: |
Kurtz wrote: |
Just a question, why make an issue of it at all? can't you function in normal society without having to explain your sexuality for no apparent reason?
I'm sure there are gay scenes in Seoul, just hunt them out and live your life, no need to flaunt your sexual orientation. |
...spoken like a straight white male |
as opposed to a straight black male?
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Pikkle
Joined: 17 Jun 2009
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Posted: Sat Sep 19, 2009 6:33 pm Post subject: |
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It's fairly easy to live gay here. Yes, you have to hide it a bit, but I never flaunted it at home anyway, and was only open about it with my good friends. Your co-workers will ask you if you have a girlfriend. I said no. It's the truth. When they asked why not, I told them women were too dramatic and I've had my heart broken. Also true, and they love that sappy stuff anyway.
I am perfectly happy here. I can go into Seoul if I need to, I can use the internet, etc. Just keep business and play seperate, and everything will be great |
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cruisemonkey

Joined: 04 Jul 2005 Location: Hopefully, the same place as my luggage.
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Posted: Sat Sep 19, 2009 6:47 pm Post subject: |
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The whole 'effin' country is gay... it's just on a long river in Africa.  |
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byrddogs

Joined: 19 Jun 2009 Location: Shanghai
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Posted: Sat Sep 19, 2009 9:15 pm Post subject: |
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NYCESOL11211 wrote: |
the oak llama wrote: |
Kurtz wrote: |
Just a question, why make an issue of it at all? can't you function in normal society without having to explain your sexuality for no apparent reason?
I'm sure there are gay scenes in Seoul, just hunt them out and live your life, no need to flaunt your sexual orientation. |
...spoken like a straight white male |
as opposed to a straight black male?
 |
It 's common knwledge to Koreans in Seoul at least that there is a "gay" scene around Jongno Sam-ga. |
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cruisemonkey

Joined: 04 Jul 2005 Location: Hopefully, the same place as my luggage.
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Posted: Sat Sep 19, 2009 9:52 pm Post subject: |
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I used to work in the K-onservative 'boonies' with a gay, black guy. Every Friday afternoon he jumped on a bus into 'the big city' where he converted from Christianity to Islam. The Ks never figured it out.  |
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storysinger81

Joined: 25 Mar 2007 Location: Daegu
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Posted: Sun Sep 20, 2009 3:57 pm Post subject: |
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My co-worker (public school--foreign lang HS so there are two of us English native teachers) is gay and dating a Korean man long term.
It's pretty obvious to foreigners, but most of the Koreans have no clue and he's not very direct. He just refers to his boyfriend as his "friend" and only one very sharp, very worldly co-teacher picked up on it.
In all honesty, I think some of them know because the teacher who was here before us had a big mouth, but no one cares. If I'd shacked up with my Korean boyfriend prior to getting engaged, that would have been a much bigger scandal than his being gay. They're perfectly happy to ignore it and so it never comes up.
Generally, Koreans are confused and curious. They honestly believe they don't know anyone who is gay, so yeah, some have negative stereotypes. Might be different in Seoul where the gay scene is becoming a little more "known" (sadly, yes, more information all around would make it MORE dangerous to be gay in Korea), but I can't imagine that unless you're hitting on students/male co-workers it will be much of an issue. Hell, you COULD hit on male students and co-workers by asking them out for drinks and even hugging them/holding hands with them/sitting on each others' laps without raising an eyebrow. Don't do this with your female students/co-teachers, though.
However, if you're transgender, come on over 'cause Koreans are very accepting of transgender. |
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Reise-ohne-Ende
Joined: 07 Sep 2009
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Posted: Mon Sep 21, 2009 8:31 am Post subject: |
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Quote: |
However, if you're transgender, come on over 'cause Koreans are very accepting of transgender. |
Are they? That's awesome. Why do you think that is? |
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Carla
Joined: 21 Nov 2008
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Posted: Mon Sep 21, 2009 9:58 am Post subject: |
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Reise-ohne-Ende wrote: |
Quote: |
However, if you're transgender, come on over 'cause Koreans are very accepting of transgender. |
Are they? That's awesome. Why do you think that is? |
I personally think "fascinated" is the better word for how they think about transgenders. What ever happened to that singer? Is she still around? |
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Bryan
Joined: 29 Oct 2007
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Posted: Mon Sep 21, 2009 10:53 am Post subject: |
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As far as university aged people go, they seem to be fine with gay people and accepting. At least girls were. One of my girlfriend's good friends is a gay guy. Also, basically every university student who has spent a year or more abroad in a Western country seems to be fine with it/it's no biggy. My idea of university students may be slightly skewed because I hung out with a lot of people who spent time abroad.
I have a Korean friend who is gay and his family was really hard on him and stopped contact with him for a couple years when he came out at the start of college, but he's accepted again.
I'm not sure about the working environment because I didn't work in Korea. I also had a gay Korean professor though and he was regarded as a great teacher. He actually was actually one of my most motivating professors last year. By the way, it was SO obvious that he was gay, yet he told us his family keeps on asking him why he isn't married yet. Oblivious... lol |
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Mr. Susan

Joined: 17 Dec 2007 Location: death row
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Posted: Mon Sep 21, 2009 2:33 pm Post subject: |
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What I still don't understand is how Koreans can be such homophobes, when in reality they are the most feminine bunch of men ever.
Don't take offense to this, I'm not a homophobe, I have a lot of gay friends, and have worked in a gay bar before. These are just some general observations. Just poking fun at Korean men..................
-Pink shirts and pink ties for all men.
-Pair those with a shiny suit.
-They carry hand bags.
-They hold hands walking down the street, and I often see men sitting on other men's laps.
-They listen to love ballads.
-They watch TV dramas (like Bold and the Beautiful type of stuff) while driving!
-They constantly tell men they are handsome (I like this though, and wish more men in western culture could be so open)
-Whining like my 6 year old boys at school.
But, I know they're not gay because:
-I've been to jimjilbangs and seen how grossly hairy these guys are down south. Manscape guys, MANSCAPE!
-Overly aggressive drunks. |
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