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Korean Job Discussion Forums
"The Internet's Meeting Place for ESL/EFL Teachers from Around the World!"
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xingyiman
Joined: 12 Jan 2006
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 Posted: Wed Jul 15, 2009 8:01 pm Post subject: |
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| The Dave's marathon troll poster. |
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Fermentator75
Joined: 27 Jul 2009
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| Posted: Mon Aug 03, 2009 10:20 pm Post subject: |
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This is me:
The soon to be in Korea newbie who is terrified of the Dave's community of seen it all, not seen enough, all too willing/not willing to befriend because they are one of the aforementioned types, not knowing which advice to take from whom, who will probably fail at being somewhat mysterious (aka) reserved because he is naturally talkative but now probably overly cautious about being labeled as a too cool-complainer -still living like a college student- hating on fellow whitey's because of living in a state heavily populated with Asians for a decade so thinks he is accustom to Asian tendencies and now wants to avoid FT contact as much as possible and be blissfully ignorant slowly picking up Korean as he goes and holing up in his apartment with his soju and OB writing and playing guitar like depressed poets do, doing his thing and reflecting on whether he should hang with any of the FT's from the school he was hired at and figure out how to make an early exit on nights out pretending like he is thrilled to be in the- all too willing FT's "show you the ropes" company and not getting close to any of them because he knows they are scrutinizing his every move (or not) deciding whether or not he will fit in or survive the year only to find that they can't stand him after a few months and knowing that his affection for them will fade just as quickly if he doesn't ease into relationships of any kind and remembers to always keep his guard up while stepping on the back of his jeans pants on his day off because he likes a baggier fit-not gangster baggy but definitely not male-skinny new school faggy but a little saggy rather, Teacher Type... who promises to himself never to use the word 'whilst' in writing or out loud ever in his life, ever, because it looks/sounds stupidly pretentious.      |
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alphakennyone
Joined: 01 Aug 2005
Location: city heights
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Carla
Joined: 21 Nov 2008
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| Posted: Mon Aug 03, 2009 11:37 pm Post subject: |
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| Darl wrote: |
handsome ass geniuses rock...thats why they didn't make the list.
however, I did forget the lifer. (gotta make fun of meself for a minute here.)
Lifers tend to have the Korean wife and baby, (babies)....Shall not acknowledge you on the street, because foreigners no longer are exciting. Nights in Itaewon or Hongdae are simply a distant memory, diapers have become reality while the Candy Bar and $20 drinks are just part of the past. They seem sad that they have to pay for their house while others don't. They are also angry that the second part of the Star Wars double-trilogy sucked. (Jar-Jar) They are very angry that their wives make them scrub the toilet rather than just pee it off. You can see the angst on their faces. In the end they acknowledge that Korean food doesn't taste very good. You guys have to know that in between every rocking samgyeopsal roast there are a good 5 days of squid and smelly soup. lots of rice too. Thank _od for Costco.
Newbies? they tend to fit into any of the 5 catagories previously mentioned, just depends on the person. |
Just wondering, what "stages" did you go through? |
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rchristo10
Joined: 14 Jul 2009
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| Posted: Mon Aug 03, 2009 11:39 pm Post subject: |
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| The ones who assume that everyone else walking around Korea is also. You know, the one's who really don't get that some foreigners aren't teachers and have been desensitized to noticing every foreigner that happens to walk by. |
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Oreovictim
Joined: 23 Aug 2006
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| Posted: Tue Aug 04, 2009 12:01 am Post subject: |
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Man, that Weekend update was annoying. She did do a really good job at it, though. But, yeah, annoying.
The first time I saw your avatar, it took me a minute or two to remember the artist - Captain Beefheart. A friend had me listen to a few tracks once. I couldn't get in to it at all. I felt like Mr. Beefheart was trying too hard to be different. Cool, creepy cover album, though. |
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Sergio Stefanuto
Joined: 14 May 2009
Location: UK
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| Posted: Tue Aug 18, 2009 7:03 pm Post subject: |
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| Sergio Stefanuto wrote: |
the 50 year old weirdo
50 year old weirdos come in two shapes and sizes - either religious or borderline alcy. But utterly, totally odd
The grad who, 20 years ago, would never, ever have gotten within a mile of college
About as sharp as a marble
The disillusioned white chick who married a Korean guy
lost, unpleasant, unhappy, a heavy smoker, borderline alcy, terrible mother. Gets drunk and flirts with foreign guys.
The angry and perpetually-plastered white guy who married a Korean girl
Waking up to an adjuma every morning with her kimchi breath isn't what he signed up for. He thought he was marrying gorgeous young Su Yeon. Resentful, violent, no interests. Hasn't read a book for a decade. Except Toss English Level 3, of course, which he uses for his "advanced" middle schoolers
The mystic, the Buddhist hippy
You won't see much of this guy. He's always at home chanting and meditating
The overconfident 'professional' who STILL loves Korea like it's his first month
Thinks a degree plus three years at Toss English makes him some kind of expert qualified to give advice to anyone blessed to cross his path.
The couple
One partner is always - always! - much better looking than the other. Good-looking, but unavailable.
The model
This man or woman is just straight-up gorgeous (but very arrogant and always American). They never do more than one year here, maybe even quit before half way. Too good-looking for all this crap.
the former army guy
These guys are usually fine, but tend to always mention the army and may also shout out - very unfunnily - army phrases ("sir, yes, sir!" etc).
the Valley girl gyopo
Always hot, but very loud and, like, annoying and stuff |
the white girl whose weight BALLOONS!
You remember, 6 months ago, when a girl - lovely, pretty little thing - arrives fresh off the boat from Arseville. 6 months later, she's as saggy as a sack of beans with an arse like a bag of laundry. Too many nights on the town and too many pizzas, luv..... |
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DCJames
Joined: 27 Jul 2006
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| Posted: Tue Aug 18, 2009 8:44 pm Post subject: |
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The Sexpat
Has been in Korea for a while now and is typically a bit older than the recent grads that come to Korea to pay off loans. He's a guy that lives and works in Korea simply to finance his prostitution activities in nearby countries like Thailand, Philippines, Cambodia, Vietnam.
He can be spotted in juicy bars in Itaewon when not visiting the before mentioned countries. |
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asylum seeker
Joined: 22 Jul 2007
Location: On your computer screen.
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| Posted: Thu Aug 20, 2009 10:03 am Post subject: |
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| DCJames wrote: |
The Sexpat
Has been in Korea for a while now and is typically a bit older than the recent grads that come to Korea to pay off loans. He's a guy that lives and works in Korea simply to finance his prostitution activities in nearby countries like Thailand, Philippines, Cambodia, Vietnam.
He can be spotted in juicy bars in Itaewon when not visiting the before mentioned countries. |
I think there are several of these guys on Dave's ESL. They are the ones who always boast about how they never spend any money in Korea (they're saving it for the next sex tour). More than a bit older than recent grads though. Usually in their late 40's or early 50's. |
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Toju
Joined: 06 Mar 2008
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| Posted: Fri Aug 21, 2009 2:34 pm Post subject: |
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| Sergio Stefanuto wrote: |
the white girl whose weight BALLOONS!
You remember, 6 months ago, when a girl - lovely, pretty little thing - arrives fresh off the boat from Arseville. 6 months later, she's as saggy as a sack of beans with an arse like a bag of laundry. Too many nights on the town and too many pizzas, luv..... |
In the UK, the Kiwi girls call that the Heathrow Injection.
Nobody has, as yet, mentioned Canadians with the badge on their backpack, that they have to carry everywhere, wearing hiking boots and chinos, often with a pony tail and usually from the East Coast somewhere. |
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AgentM
Joined: 07 Jun 2009
Location: British Columbia, Canada
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| Posted: Fri Aug 21, 2009 2:48 pm Post subject: |
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| Toju wrote: |
| Nobody has, as yet, mentioned Canadians with the badge on their backpack, that they have to carry everywhere, wearing hiking boots and chinos, often with a pony tail and usually from the East Coast somewhere. |
Maybe that's because we're not that annoying?  |
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Toju
Joined: 06 Mar 2008
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| Posted: Fri Aug 21, 2009 4:50 pm Post subject: |
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| AgentM wrote: |
| Toju wrote: |
| Nobody has, as yet, mentioned Canadians with the badge on their backpack, that they have to carry everywhere, wearing hiking boots and chinos, often with a pony tail and usually from the East Coast somewhere. |
Maybe that's because we're not that annoying? |
That is one of the funniest things I have read in a long, long time.  |
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aboxofchocolates
Joined: 21 Mar 2008
Location: on your mind
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| Posted: Fri Aug 21, 2009 6:33 pm Post subject: |
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| AgentM wrote: |
| Toju wrote: |
| Nobody has, as yet, mentioned Canadians with the badge on their backpack, that they have to carry everywhere, wearing hiking boots and chinos, often with a pony tail and usually from the East Coast somewhere. |
Maybe that's because we're not that annoying? |
West coast troll! Go smoke a dube, hippy man, that comment was meant for east coasters.
I speak for us all when I say we will spitefully and successfully annoy the rest of the world until the darned seal stop eating our cod and we can make our money at home again. Also, I need to carry a backpack, I have a lot of stuff! I'm working in those boots so I don't get blisters on longer hikes- I have a pair of fancy black boots for weddings and funerals. And I don't know what chinos are, but I bet they're extremely warm and practical- I approve of them entirely. |
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AgentM
Joined: 07 Jun 2009
Location: British Columbia, Canada
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| Posted: Fri Aug 21, 2009 10:36 pm Post subject: |
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| aboxofchocolates wrote: |
| West coast troll! Go smoke a dube, hippy man, that comment was meant for east coasters. |
So sue me, he said Canadians! Or maybe you can't read? 
BTW, I've never smoked pot or done any illicit drugs in my life, and I'm too conservative (though not politically) to be a hippy. |
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aboxofchocolates
Joined: 21 Mar 2008
Location: on your mind
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| Posted: Sat Aug 22, 2009 6:57 am Post subject: |
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| AgentM wrote: |
| aboxofchocolates wrote: |
| West coast troll! Go smoke a dube, hippy man, that comment was meant for east coasters. |
So sue me, he said Canadians! Or maybe you can't read?
BTW, I've never smoked pot or done any illicit drugs in my life, and I'm too conservative (though not politically) to be a hippy. |
Pfft, real Canadians have to shovel their asses out of ten feet of snow to get to work every winter, not just enjoy it on a ski hill like you people in shiny happy lala land. Go plant freakishly large flowers in your communal garden, commie! |
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