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fermentation
Joined: 22 Jun 2009
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 Posted: Thu Sep 17, 2009 4:54 am Post subject: |
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| I think it has something to do with being a foreigner in a foreign country as a temporary resident. I can't imagine having a true long term relationship in a place I wasn't planning to stay at, while having to go through learning the language and culture. Is Korea or asian culture not as "genuine?" I would agree theres a good amount of fronting here, but then again, most things/people in this world are full of [Mod Edit]. |
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Darkray16
Joined: 09 Nov 2008
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| Posted: Thu Sep 17, 2009 4:55 am Post subject: |
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| Changwon Charlie wrote: |
What a load of hogwash....
Relationships are as real as anywhere I have ever lived in the world.
I married a Korean girl many years ago, still feels pretty real to me...
I know many people who have married or been in long-term relationships with korean women. Don't think it is fake.
maybe you should change the kidn of girl you are dating instead of the standard itaewon skank or english-practice seeking princess. |
Better yet, if relationships constantly go bad, maybe you should take a look at yourself. |
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redaxe
Joined: 01 Dec 2008
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| Posted: Thu Sep 17, 2009 5:40 am Post subject: |
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| Darkray16 wrote: |
| Changwon Charlie wrote: |
What a load of hogwash....
Relationships are as real as anywhere I have ever lived in the world.
I married a Korean girl many years ago, still feels pretty real to me...
I know many people who have married or been in long-term relationships with korean women. Don't think it is fake.
maybe you should change the kidn of girl you are dating instead of the standard itaewon skank or english-practice seeking princess. |
Better yet, if relationships constantly go bad, maybe you should take a look at yourself. |
Yeah I believe there's a saying:
"The common denominator in all your failed relationships is you."
Although, I have to agree with the meeting at a bar part. I don't really know how it is back home because I never meet girls at bars in America, but I've met several girls at bars here in Korea and the resulting "relationship" never lasted more than a month. I've had much more successful relationships with girls I met on the internet  |
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Savant
Joined: 25 May 2007
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| Posted: Thu Sep 17, 2009 6:24 am Post subject: |
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Been with my Korean girlfriend for over 2 years now and it seems real to me.
We met in my own country and have been together in Korea for over 1 year.
I have met her parents and we socialise with her brother on occasion.
If you can prove your immediate future lies in Korea and you are not just a 1 year romance then I believe the relationship would be easier. If you are just hanging around here for a year then I can see why Korean women are wary of having meaningful relationships with foreign teachers. |
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Tundra_Creature
Joined: 11 Jun 2009
Location: Canada
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| Posted: Thu Sep 17, 2009 6:30 am Post subject: |
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| Seeing as the divorce rate in North America is pretty high (not sure about the other countries) and there's tons of people having non-serious relationships there, I don't really see how it would make relationships in Korea any more fake (or less) 'fake'. |
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PARAMDUNGI
Joined: 11 Sep 2009
Location: Busan
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| Posted: Thu Sep 17, 2009 11:44 am Post subject: |
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| Darkray16 wrote: |
| Changwon Charlie wrote: |
What a load of hogwash....
Relationships are as real as anywhere I have ever lived in the world.
I married a Korean girl many years ago, still feels pretty real to me...
I know many people who have married or been in long-term relationships with korean women. Don't think it is fake.
maybe you should change the kidn of girl you are dating instead of the standard itaewon skank or english-practice seeking princess. |
Better yet, if relationships constantly go bad, maybe you should take a look at yourself. |
Yea that's a good point. |
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jamesteacho
Joined: 11 Jun 2009
Location: Non of your business/somewhere in shibuya Japan
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| Posted: Thu Sep 17, 2009 12:11 pm Post subject: |
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| koreancupid.com ublove.com and english itaewon skanks that are scattered throughout seoul, without them what would the chances be compared to now? less than 50%? |
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mc_jc
Joined: 13 Aug 2009
Location: C4B- Cp Red Cloud, Area-I
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| Posted: Thu Sep 17, 2009 1:30 pm Post subject: |
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| OP, please define "real"? |
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Mr. Pink
Joined: 21 Oct 2003
Location: China
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| Posted: Thu Sep 17, 2009 3:19 pm Post subject: |
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| misher wrote: |
| Quote: |
What a load of hogwash....
Relationships are as real as anywhere I have ever lived in the world.
I married a Korean girl many years ago, still feels pretty real to me...
I know many people who have married or been in long-term relationships with korean women. Don't think it is fake.
maybe you should change the kidn of girl you are dating instead of the standard itaewon skank or english-practice seeking princess. |
Do yourself a favor stop frothing at the mouth. What part of "generally speaking" don't you understand?
Of course there are exceptions. Many guys happily got married here and remain happy to this day. I would however disagree if you said this was the case for the majority of relationships and I'm sure that many men and women here made plenty of sacrifices. Getting married in a completely foreign culture can't be that easy. The cultural barrier and lack of proper communication tends to generate issues for many people looking to shack up with someone from here. For every happy couple that defied the odds and made it here (Kudos to you and I hope to be among your kind some day) there have to be many others that failed. |
Um you could say this about any country. Dating is about success and failures. After you are done with university and matured a bit, dating should be for the goal of marriage. If it isn't, guess why there might be a bigger problem for those "players" in Korea? Korean girls are more set on marriage than their western counterparts.
I had some failures before I met my wife, but I chalked that up to the fact that it is normal in the dating world. If you dated 1 girl and married her, how would you really know it was your perfect match? |
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ekul
Joined: 04 Mar 2009
Location: [Mod Edit]
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| Posted: Thu Sep 17, 2009 3:47 pm Post subject: |
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| What's wrong with meeting people in a pub? I met my gf in a nightclub and we've been together for three years and I can't see it faltering any time soon. People like to socialise in bars, it's not a crime and doesn't make you some kind of slag or scum bag. |
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saw6436
Joined: 16 Jan 2003
Location: Daejeon, ROK
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| Posted: Thu Sep 17, 2009 3:59 pm Post subject: |
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| Working on my 9th year with my wife here in the ROK. Ups and Downs? A few. Are we going strong? Absolutely! |
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redaxe
Joined: 01 Dec 2008
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| Posted: Thu Sep 17, 2009 5:46 pm Post subject: |
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| ekul wrote: |
| What's wrong with meeting people in a pub? I met my gf in a nightclub and we've been together for three years and I can't see it faltering any time soon. People like to socialise in bars, it's not a crime and doesn't make you some kind of slag or scum bag. |
No, it doesn't automatically mean there's anything wrong with you or that the relationship cannot succeed. But judging from a lot of anecdotal experience, there's just a higher % chance that someone you meet in a bar is not looking for a serious relationship, or is simply wearing "beer goggles" and will not find you so attractive in broad daylight (or you them). |
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juicyhumdinger
Joined: 03 Jan 2005
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| Posted: Thu Sep 17, 2009 6:14 pm Post subject: |
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From my experience, Korea does seem to have that effect: I've known several couples that came here together, only to have the relationship explode while in country or shortly after they leave. Seen it happen quite a few times actually. We're not talking about just boyfriend / girlfriend type of scenarios, but marriages of several years going off the rails as well. It's odd.
An interesting aside is that several of the guys ended up coming back and marrying Koreans. Make of that what you will. |
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fermentation
Joined: 22 Jun 2009
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| Posted: Thu Sep 17, 2009 7:10 pm Post subject: |
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| Tundra_Creature wrote: |
| Seeing as the divorce rate in North America is pretty high (not sure about the other countries) and there's tons of people having non-serious relationships there, I don't really see how it would make relationships in Korea any more fake (or less) 'fake'. |
I don't think divorce rates mean anything in terms of being real. People realizing that it's not gonna work out seems more real than maintaining a long, empty relationship (which I've seen plenty of in both the US and Korea). But then again, I'm a young guy who doesn't believe in marriage in the first place. |
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Goku
Joined: 10 Dec 2008
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| Posted: Thu Sep 17, 2009 7:35 pm Post subject: |
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| juicyhumdinger wrote: |
From my experience, Korea does seem to have that effect: I've known several couples that came here together, only to have the relationship explode while in country or shortly after they leave. Seen it happen quite a few times actually. We're not talking about just boyfriend / girlfriend type of scenarios, but marriages of several years going off the rails as well. It's odd.
An interesting aside is that several of the guys ended up coming back and marrying Koreans. Make of that what you will. |
I've noticed this too
It seems to do with either time, or the societal differences. But I'm much more inclined to think it's the lifestyle changes that make people egotistical or whatever, that leads to the breakup. |
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