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Dating trend: "Back-up" dating
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bassexpander



Joined: 13 Sep 2007
Location: Someplace you'd rather be.

PostPosted: Thu Oct 15, 2009 7:24 am    Post subject: Dating trend: "Back-up" dating Reply with quote

http://www.koreatimes.co.kr/www/news/biz/2009/10/123_53595.html
Quote:

He calls at least once a week and text messages more often than that, but almost never asks to meet. So what does 28-year-old Choi do with the man she once categorized as her potential boyfriend?

"Downright ignore," says the single woman, who, after three years of active dating, labels herself a pro in sniffing out men "who play tricks to keep women around" as candidates for future relationships.

"It is so obvious when a man treats a woman like a backup," said Choi. "There's a lot of talk, but no real action to get a relationship going."

It never feels good to be under the "maybe good for later" category, she said, but admits that she classifies certain men the same way...
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Olivencia



Joined: 08 Mar 2009

PostPosted: Thu Oct 15, 2009 10:48 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Don't know how things play out in Korea but back home it seemed the worse women were treated (to a certain extent) the more they liked ya..chicks love the unusual, mysterious and that I don't care approach Smile
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youtuber



Joined: 13 Sep 2009

PostPosted: Thu Oct 15, 2009 1:19 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hardly a trend.

Men and women would get along much better if both realize this:


men want sex

women want someone to take care of them


That's it.
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Olivencia



Joined: 08 Mar 2009

PostPosted: Thu Oct 15, 2009 2:57 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Can that be looked at economically as in supply and demand?
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UrbanStyle



Joined: 23 Jul 2009

PostPosted: Thu Oct 15, 2009 3:41 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Some women are just looking to bang too Razz
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Xuanzang



Joined: 10 Apr 2007
Location: Sadang

PostPosted: Thu Oct 15, 2009 3:51 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Sports fish vs. keepers.
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Papa Smurf



Joined: 18 Jul 2006
Location: Seoul

PostPosted: Thu Oct 15, 2009 4:05 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

pretty much sums up my dating life in Korea....
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Joe666



Joined: 19 Nov 2008
Location: Jesus it's hot down here!

PostPosted: Thu Oct 15, 2009 4:07 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

It's a war I tell ya, a long drawn out WAR!!
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Bloopity Bloop



Joined: 26 Apr 2009
Location: Seoul yo

PostPosted: Thu Oct 15, 2009 4:58 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Korean girls are freaked out by me because I'm Asian--but I'm not Korean, and when they discover this, it isn't, "OHHH FOREIGNER. WHERE ARE YOU PROM?" They just freak out. White people have it easy.

On second though... maybe I'm just damn ugly.

EDIT: So yeah, not even making the back-up lists.
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Clockout



Joined: 23 Feb 2009

PostPosted: Thu Oct 15, 2009 5:00 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Yeah, I do this.
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Clockout



Joined: 23 Feb 2009

PostPosted: Thu Oct 15, 2009 5:02 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

The key is to realize that A LOT of people do this (men and women) and to avoid being the "backup person."

That's the only way to take the power away from them.
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benji



Joined: 21 Jul 2009

PostPosted: Thu Oct 15, 2009 5:04 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

To me "back up" dating conjures up images of something completely different.
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mc_jc



Joined: 13 Aug 2009
Location: C4B- Cp Red Cloud, Area-I

PostPosted: Thu Oct 15, 2009 5:58 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Women do the same thing- the try to string along a guy until she is done with her relationship and then moves on with her second-string.

I, for one, won't have any of that bs in my life.

Here's one for the record books-

I was once dating this one girl for about 6 months before she tried to pressure me to marry her (I guess she thought~ nice job+nice car+nice place= marriage material). I said thats not going to happen because I haven't known her long enough. Then she said it was over and said there were many other guys that would kill to go out with her. I said fine, go on your merry way and have a nice life. As she sat sulking in the chair like a freakin' baby, I just called up another girl and made plans to go out with her instead (hey- I had movie tickets~ what else am I going to do?). She ran out of the restaurant crying hysterically, I guess she was upset that I called her on her bluff- oh well...

Point is- no use wasting your time with someone who is going to try to manipulate you to do something while there are many other people out there worth meeting. If someone is string another person along, don't take it and move on- screw them (unless that is what you are trying to do, then its going to be a very lonely night in front of the ol' monitor).
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gakduki



Joined: 16 Jul 2009
Location: Passed out on line 2 going in circles

PostPosted: Thu Oct 15, 2009 6:47 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

What about the other way around. When you are dating someone, seeing them often hopefully just for short run play. But you really want someone else who is often busy and not that easy to get.
Is it called forward dating?
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Leslie Cheswyck



Joined: 31 May 2003
Location: University of Western Chile

PostPosted: Thu Oct 15, 2009 6:49 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

It's not a trend. It's just made more immediate and "in-your-face" by the cell-phone. Good work, mc_jc.
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