Korean Job Discussion Forums

[wunderkind]

Have you ever outgrown your friends? I think I do this fairly often, maybe because I'm stuck between introverted and extroverted.

I don't really talk to anyone from high school, and it's because I don't want to. I have a few friends from college that I imagine I will always have but even some of those I haven't kept up with as well as I should. The friends I've made here in Korea are pretty cool but I met pretty much all these friends while going out and partying. I feel like I've started to outgrow them after only about 9 months of knowing them.

I can have fun in the clubs and such but the best nights I have are when I go out by myself, play pool, drink a few beers and read a book.

So what about you?

[Goku]

I think it depends on the person and friends.

But I have noticed in some ways I am maturing faster in Korea than I would have in America. I think it's the plethora of problems one has to deal with makes you mature faster. And the obvious cultural and language barriers make it even faster.

But because maturity is kind elusive... with nobody really having a firm grasp on what it REALLY is. (sometimes it's a mood, a feeling, sometimes it's responsibility, wisdom) I find that the foreigners I meet in Korea are not mature.

I'm not really sure though. A lot of people come here for money and women and to escape their problems. Which is an obvious sign of immaturity to escape like that. But on the other hand, it's actually a great solution to their problems, so there is some wisdom in their decision to come to Korea.

It's hard really to say who is mature and who isn't. Anyways, I feel like everyone around me is immature, foreigner and Korean alike. Maybe I'm projecting some of my own insecurities to them, I certainly hope not.

But I will say that Korea SPECIFICALLY doesn't make foreigners mature faster, in fact, in some ways i think it hinders progress because Korea has a lot temptation with little social ostracism. All this room salon crap and bali bali culture drinking culture definitely is making the people around me wane in a cesspool of temptation and selfishness. I feel like I'm in a child-man playground 24/7.

[Panda]

Yes, I guess the first one or two years foreigners spend in Korea are usually very productive, as long as you are socially functional. Meeting friends, travelling, experiencing, etc. Thus very likely you will overgrow your friends.

Imaginably, you won't spend equal time with all of them, thats how you will stay close to some and alianate some others, which depends on how much time and energy you could invest.

I was even defriended by several friends who got mad at me simply because I couldn't spend time with them...But I tried not to feel guilty, after all, I didnt reach out for friends in the first place.

[UknowsI]

[youtuber]

I like it when my friends are single and don't have girlfriends. They hang out more, are easier to talk to, and are not chained down by some jealous bittch.

Once my buddies get a steady gf or wife, I find it really hard to relate to them. Their schedules aren't free anymore, and basically, they do anything to prevent themselves from being dumped. Like little puppies.

[Fishead soup]

Most people mature fast in the first two years. Then they discover the soju lifestyle and revert back to University party lifestyle.

[shifter2009]

[Fox]

[Junior]

Its been a little dissapointing re-contacting friends from 15 years ago via facebook.
I mean they just don't seem to have acuired a whole lot of things that I have over the past decade or so, personality-wise.
I'm talking perspective, curiosity about the world, openness, living in the moment, enjoyment, compassion, adventure, values etc..just a bit of a gulf there.

The day I decided to spend my life seeing the world at large rather than paying off a mortgage in the same job and hometown...was something I have never ever regretted.

[Tycho Brahe]

outgrowing people is a wierd way to put it....

you have gone off in a different direction but you're always going to be the person you were way back when to those people as are they to you.

[Aelric]

I don't think anybody is outgrowing anybody, they are just veering in different direction. Some of my friends from high school got married and had kids, I went to college. Neither of us outgrow the other, like there is a level to maturity to compare, just different paths.

I suppose if any of then just hung around and smoked weed and played Nintendo, I might think I outgrew them. People are going to go down the paths they want to and that is different for everyone. Some friends you keep despite the difference, others you don't. I still keep in touch with a few of my oldest friends, one I've known since I was 10, others I met a few years ago, got really close to and now will probably never see again. It's just life.

[Panda]

[Khenan]

[AmericanExile]

[djsmnc]