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A "culture" question
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Olivencia



Joined: 08 Mar 2009

PostPosted: Tue Dec 29, 2009 2:26 pm    Post subject: A "culture" question Reply with quote

Is there anything that you do in Korea that Korean society culturally (not legally) disapproves of?
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conbon78



Joined: 05 Jun 2008

PostPosted: Tue Dec 29, 2009 3:34 pm    Post subject: yes Reply with quote

Yes...I find most people are offended culturally, although I'm never sure when. Like if I blow my nose - they think it is disgusting because they think you should suck it up through your nose and then spit it out. Or if I start eating before the oldest person at the table, which I'm never sure who is the oldest since no one shares their birthday with me. Lots of things...the list could go on. I just play the foreigner card.
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BoholDiver



Joined: 03 Oct 2009
Location: Canada

PostPosted: Tue Dec 29, 2009 4:01 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Just my general attitude. People think they have the right to touch my daughter, tell me how to parent, etc. I let them know not to do that. The look of shock on their face says it all.

I was scolded by one of my wife's friends once. She came over and was talking 100% to my wife and none to me. I started using the computer. She told me that was rude because we had guests. It's 'Korean culture'. I countered and said 'The master of this house is not Korean,' and continued.
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sarahsiobhan



Joined: 24 May 2009
Location: Wherever I am , I am probably drinking tea.

PostPosted: Tue Dec 29, 2009 4:02 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ko-workers- "Sarah Teacher, you have boyfriend?"

Me- "No."

Ko-workers- "Sarah Teacher, why no boyfriend? "

Me- "Just because. It's complicated."

Ko-workers- "But what about married?"

Me- "I never want to get married."

Ko-workers all fall over from the shock, then try to tell me I *have* to get married, for various reasons...too many to list. They think I am insane.
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andrewchon



Joined: 16 Nov 2008
Location: Back in Oz. Living in ISIS Aust.

PostPosted: Tue Dec 29, 2009 4:02 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

+1 on blowing the nose.
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redaxe



Joined: 01 Dec 2008

PostPosted: Tue Dec 29, 2009 4:31 pm    Post subject: Re: A "culture" question Reply with quote

Olivencia wrote:
Is there anything that you do in Korea that Korean society culturally (not legally) disapproves of?


Yes--I trim my pubic hair.
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CentralCali



Joined: 17 May 2007

PostPosted: Tue Dec 29, 2009 4:45 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I have the audacity to be a single foreign male in this country and--horror of horrors!--actually speak in Korean with single female Koreans in public!
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ashland



Joined: 05 Dec 2008

PostPosted: Tue Dec 29, 2009 4:53 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

this thread is going nowhere...
TRASH.
these fools have no future.
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ytuque



Joined: 29 Jan 2008
Location: I drink therefore I am!

PostPosted: Tue Dec 29, 2009 4:56 pm    Post subject: Re: A "culture" question Reply with quote

Olivencia wrote:
Is there anything that you do in Korea that Korean society culturally (not legally) disapproves of?


Here's a few:

1. Pouring your own drink at a bar
2. Having friends who are older/younger than you are
3. Wearing certain clothes like jeans after a certain age
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conbon78



Joined: 05 Jun 2008

PostPosted: Tue Dec 29, 2009 5:04 pm    Post subject: culture Reply with quote

The cultural crap about things I "have to" do drives me batty. For example...I'm marrying a Korean and we work at a Korean corporation.

1) When is your wedding? Where will it be? You have to have a Korean wedding.
Answer: We haven't decided yet (even though we are getting married in Greece) b/c if we tell them its going to be hours of questioning and looks of disappointment about how we are disappointing their culture.

Question - Why do we have to have a Korean wedding? Is that the law? Will I be shot, taken to jail, or what will happen to me if I don't? NOTHING. Funny thing is that my fiance just constantly challenges people on it by saying WHY? And they don't know how to respond.

Also...we are going to Chicago over Lunar New Year.
Korean's response: No, you should go see your fiance's family in Busan.
My response: No, I think we are going to go see my family.
Korean's response: Well you are marrying a Korean so you need to spend the holidays with his family.

Really? Where is that rule written? I would like to see documentation. They can get in the wind for all I care.

Funny side note: my fiance called the embassy of Korea in Greece to coordinate the paperwork, but the lady didn't know what to tell him. She said "we've never had any Koreans get married in Greece. We'll I will talk to the Japan embassy because they have." hahaha Not ONE single Korean has ever gotten married in Greece. Hilarious! I don't think they know where Greece is.
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jmuns



Joined: 09 Sep 2009
Location: earth

PostPosted: Tue Dec 29, 2009 5:10 pm    Post subject: Re: culture Reply with quote

conbon78 wrote:
The cultural crap about things I "have to" do drives me batty. For example...I'm marrying a Korean and we work at a Korean corporation.


good luck with your marriage! you do know you are marrying a korean, so therefore you are marrying into korean culture in a way. dont you think your friends would wonder why you would spend thanksgiving day in busan with your korean fiances family? maybe just a little?
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Steelrails



Joined: 12 Mar 2009
Location: Earth, Solar System

PostPosted: Tue Dec 29, 2009 6:26 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Pour my own booze.
Not take off my shirt and pants while in the Noraebang.
Having a concept of personal space.
Have a problem-solving approach rather than an honorific approach.
Eating Alone.
Drinking Alone.
Treat my female co-workers equally regardless of physical appearance. (Though age is still shown its proper dignity)
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storysinger81



Joined: 25 Mar 2007
Location: Daegu

PostPosted: Tue Dec 29, 2009 6:27 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

conbon--Congrats on your wedding! And I hear you on most of your post (and your fiance's response of "Why?" is great... my fiance just laughs a little and smiles and then we do whatever we wanted to in the first place), but as a fellow about-to-be-wife of a Korean man, one of the exciting things is that the major holidays DON'T overlap at all... so there is no fighting about where to spend Christmas, Thanksgiving, Seollal, or Chuseok. We'll go where we want and whatever we can afford, but at least there's no fighting about it!

For example, our honeymoon will start the day after Seollal. We could have started from the day before (since it's a Saturday), but out of respect for his mom, we're staying two more days in Korea before heading out to Cambodia.

But yeah... the wedding/marriage have-tos are crazy. You have to buy all new furniture for your house (Um... we're moving to the US next year). You have to have the wedding in a wedding hall (Um... ew. They're tacky and expensive). You have to buy all his family members presents (What am I purchasing him from them?).

His family is great, but my co-workers.... those ladies are nuts.
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Forward Observer



Joined: 13 Jan 2009
Location: FOB Gloria

PostPosted: Tue Dec 29, 2009 9:37 pm    Post subject: Re: culture Reply with quote

conbon78 wrote:
The cultural crap about things I "have to" do drives me batty. For example...I'm marrying a Korean and we work at a Korean corporation.

1) When is your wedding? Where will it be? You have to have a Korean wedding.
Answer: We haven't decided yet (even though we are getting married in Greece) b/c if we tell them its going to be hours of questioning and looks of disappointment about how we are disappointing their culture.

Question - Why do we have to have a Korean wedding? Is that the law? Will I be shot, taken to jail, or what will happen to me if I don't? NOTHING. Funny thing is that my fiance just constantly challenges people on it by saying WHY? And they don't know how to respond.

Also...we are going to Chicago over Lunar New Year.
Korean's response: No, you should go see your fiance's family in Busan.
My response: No, I think we are going to go see my family.
Korean's response: Well you are marrying a Korean so you need to spend the holidays with his family.

Really? Where is that rule written? I would like to see documentation. They can get in the wind for all I care.

Funny side note: my fiance called the embassy of Korea in Greece to coordinate the paperwork, but the lady didn't know what to tell him. She said "we've never had any Koreans get married in Greece. We'll I will talk to the Japan embassy because they have." hahaha Not ONE single Korean has ever gotten married in Greece. Hilarious! I don't think they know where Greece is.



That's interesting. I've met a few Koreans that speak modern Greek, one young lady I met that speaks fluently worked at the Korean embassy there, she was quite intelligent. BTW, the word "yes" is the same in Greek and Korean. (Neh) And the Korean word for hurry (Pali), means "again" in Greek.
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0ju



Joined: 30 Sep 2009

PostPosted: Tue Dec 29, 2009 10:02 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Steelrails wrote:
Not take off my shirt and pants while in the Noraebang.
Eating Alone.
Drinking Alone.


Never realized that any of the above were problems in Korea... Confused especially the bolded sentence.
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