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Bosintang's Eleven-Point Guide to Hagwon Survival

 
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bosintang



Joined: 01 Dec 2003
Location: In the pot with the rest of the mutts

PostPosted: Tue Mar 02, 2004 2:34 am    Post subject: Bosintang's Eleven-Point Guide to Hagwon Survival Reply with quote

Many expats come to Korea to teach English end up bitter and frustrated with their jobs. However, it is helpful to remember that you are in a different country, and therefore some respect and understanding of local business culture may be helpful in making your teaching experience much more enjoyable.

To understand local business culture, it is worthy to observe and learn from your fellow Korean co-workers. From doing this, we may observe the following:

1. Your director probably does not speak English. It is almost certain that he has never taught before. However your Director is *the* Director, afterall. Therefore that means he is always right. You are not the director; that means you are always wrong.

2. Don't mind waiting around for hours on end for your Director to have a meeting with your or deliver your pay to you. Your director's time is worth everything. Your time is worth nothing.

3. Don't mind if you get paid late, or even correctly, money isn't that important anyways.

4. Don't ever -- I repeat, don't ever -- attempt to use logic or reasoning in the workplace. As well, don't ever attempt constructive dialogue and debate. See rule #1.

5. Always take on more work, even if you don't have enough time to properly do the work you are already doing.

6. Don't fret too much over your teaching skills. Instead, smile and bow a lot, never refuse a shot of soju, and wear a tie when you pick up your paycheque. That is much more important.

7. If you are not teaching, stay at your desk for hours upon hours, even if you are not doing anything. Remember Rule #2: your time is worth nothing.

8. Before coming to Korea, it will be helpful to learn the valuable skill of mindreading. Things will often be expected of you with little or no time for you to prepare -- that's if you are even told at all.

9. Go along with any half-baked ill-conceived idea your Director thinks up, even if you are reluctant to do so. See rules #1 and #4.

10. Don't ever expect to be told the truth, or to be told straight up about absolutely anything. See Rule #7.

11. When you finally have had enough, and are on the verge of a nervous breakdown, outright quit your job. To save face, have a good excuse for doing so. A time like this is a good time for an extended vacation or to get married.

By following these eleven tips, I hope that you will find your hagwon teaching experience much more fulfilling and enjoyable.

.....

Can anyone guess who is having a really pissy day today? You get one guess.....

.....
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mourningclam



Joined: 27 Jan 2004

PostPosted: Tue Mar 02, 2004 11:17 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

12. If you want the meeting to end earlier, dont offer any constructive critcism. Just shut up, smile and say what a good idea it is to do it the director's way.
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Corporal



Joined: 25 Jan 2003

PostPosted: Tue Mar 02, 2004 11:22 pm    Post subject: Re: Bosintang's Eleven-Point Guide to Hagwon Survival Reply with quote

bosintang wrote:
wear a tie when you pick up your paycheque.


Sorry, but I think Avril Lavigne looks silly.
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Ilsanman



Joined: 15 Aug 2003
Location: Bucheon, Korea

PostPosted: Thu Mar 04, 2004 6:28 pm    Post subject: yes Reply with quote

13. The contract only applies when the director wishes to squeeze more hours out of you. If you want to enforce a clause, it won't happen.

14. If business is very bad, expect your pay to be either cut, or late, or both. This is fair. If business is really good, your pay will remain the same.
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bosintang



Joined: 01 Dec 2003
Location: In the pot with the rest of the mutts

PostPosted: Fri Mar 05, 2004 3:27 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

15. You may have the cynical view that your hagwon owner's only motivation is profit, but this couldn't be further from the truth. Hagwons are run far too innefficiently for that. The truth is that your director is motivated by higher ideas that your feeble mind is just incapable of comprehending.
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