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BIG mouth K-coworker.
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Harvard Material



Joined: 25 Feb 2003
Location: Seoul

PostPosted: Mon Mar 22, 2004 7:23 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Ask this woman to put it in writing for you. Ask her, politely, if she wouldn't mind providing a written statement of what she thinks you do wrong - or right. Then get your yellow high-lighter out and go to work on it. That's a start. If she is a teacher with a fistful of written mistakes maybe you can start advertising her weaknesses.
If she does not possess the skills to communicate with you in written form, she should refrain from assessing your teaching abilities altogether. Do you correct her Hangeul very often?

Following that advice, wait for her outside of the workplace with a Korean pal to explain that she should focus on her own responsibilities and keep out of your way in the future. Not to threaten her in any way! Just to provide a fellow Korean citizen who can relate to her; tell her what you can't, and hopefully get her to shut up.
And, everytime you hear about her talking about you, talk to your friend about her.
She wants to take that as a threat?, let her. Spouting of to your boss is definitely a direct threat towards you...in my opinion.

Maybe this 'c'-worker isn't teaching English at all - maybe she is. I am not really clear on that, but I don't believe that is the point here.

Don't expect the director to get her off of your case for you. Sounds to me like they are collaborating.
The path of least resistance is the best path, and usually the most peaceful, but rapier has a valid point. You want to continue the dialogue or get it behind you?

Incidentally, I had the same problem once. The path of least resistance failed, so I took the 'rapier' method. Fire with fire. I prefer the Good Samaritan role, but in reality it works against you unless you are facing a Good Samaritan. You are not.

And prep' yourself for a worst case scenario. Keep your eyes open for a better situation elsewhere. Sounds like a hole of a place to be stuck at cache...
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Juggertha



Joined: 27 May 2003
Location: Anyang, Korea

PostPosted: Mon Mar 22, 2004 4:28 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I had a similar situation.

I had "rejected" the girl before (I guess) and she had a hate on for me. Whenever possible she would be snide to me, call attention to any possible mistakes I made and talk to EVERYONE (even students) about me. It was funny to watch actually cuz she would be rude to me right up until the director walked in then it would be "Hi Ed, how are you today!!??". lmao

Anyways, I did alot of the previous options.

I played the nice guy and took it on the cheek for abit.

I checked my teaching to make sure there was little to pick at.

I got witnessess (coworkers) to make note of her "bias".

Finally I put her in check when she stepped over the line. This was a very smart girl and it wasn't easy... but the wicked always mess up.

It took 6 months but in the endshe was FIRED and disgraced. All the while she could have stopped her shyte but some ppl never learn.

Give the options a try, but above all.. stay true to who you are, she'll foul up eventually.
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rapier



Joined: 16 Feb 2003

PostPosted: Mon Mar 22, 2004 9:08 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Generally the only one you have to worry about ultimately is your director. Keep on a good, polite footing with him, and you'll be fine.. when he starts giving those sour greasy looks, then you have to do something..

Actually the "free flow of information" at the workplace can have its advantages. If you want the whole hagwon to know how you're feeling or whats annoying you, you have only to spill the beans to your "confidante" nice Korean teacher, and within an hour or so, everyone will know your thoughts and the behavior will change, without so much as a confrontation needed...
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Mr. Pink



Joined: 21 Oct 2003
Location: China

PostPosted: Mon Mar 22, 2004 10:07 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I would talk to her.

If that doesn't work...not sure how to advise you. Emotions are a part of who we are, and if she doesn't listen to common sense, I can see you getting pissed.

The PC bang incident shouldn't be a worry IMO. Just politely tell the director and the female teacher, what you do on your OWN TIME is non of their business.
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rapier



Joined: 16 Feb 2003

PostPosted: Tue Mar 23, 2004 3:52 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Mr. Pink wrote:
I would talk to her.

If that doesn't work...not sure how to advise you. Emotions are a part of who we are, and if she doesn't listen to common sense, I can see you getting pissed.

The PC bang incident shouldn't be a worry IMO. Just politely tell the director and the female teacher, what you do on your OWN TIME is non of their business.

The problem is that this type of co-teacher biatch doesn't listen to common sense. When you have a sour co teacher, there's no stopping them, and they are out to make the waeguks life a misery, make you look bad, and herself good. Some of them appear to have the emotional maturity of 13 year olds. Drinking soju with them can be very revealing as to just how f**ked up some of them are. They live in very dark, bitter worlds.... Not all of them of course but the ones that are bad, are a lost cause.
I have one at the moment...hated by even the Korean teachers,- the closest female to a witch I think I've ever come across.
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Skywalker26



Joined: 13 Jun 2003
Location: Up the Kyber Pass

PostPosted: Tue Mar 23, 2004 4:05 am    Post subject: yeah Reply with quote

I have worked with plenty of these types...and not just K-workers either....
I am honest and upfront about what I do with the kids, my personal time etc..but I omit certain details...for example I went to a noraebang with a couple of my high school students at my old school on a Friday night, and I told the director first thing on the following Monday saying that I "ran into" the students on Friday night...didnt say what I did, or where I went...I just said that I met them briefly.

I can understand the whole idea of 'when it's my time I can do what I want'...but I can also appreciate the 'reputation' of the school deal as well. You just have to use your common sense.

I find that if I want something done or I want a change in the school's procedures then I would tell these certain persons, but anything else I just keep to myself.

If it is a case of the K-worker just being downright vindictive then go to the boss, invite them to dinner and/or drinks and then at the appropiate time (which I gurantee that THEY will bring up before you do) voice your opinions/ideals about the the K-worker or anything else you want to get off your chest. This has worked for me anyway.

I mean it's all a game when you look at it. First in.....best looking teacher!
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Ilsanman



Joined: 15 Aug 2003
Location: Bucheon, Korea

PostPosted: Tue Mar 23, 2004 4:14 am    Post subject: yes Reply with quote

She is clearly spineless. Confront her face to face and she will be so embarrassed.
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cacheSurfer



Joined: 07 Dec 2003

PostPosted: Tue Mar 23, 2004 7:26 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

**here is my follow-up...

well, after classes tonight i approached the subject and asked if she had a problem with me. she said that she didn't....so i asked her why she kept talking about me.

her response was that...she didnt mean for it to cause any problems. the girl said she was sorry and we ended the conversation.

i didn't loose my cool. i kept it short and simple.


the next time it happens i will have to start yelling. i gave my warning and hopefully everything is goes smooth. (only 1 warning) Evil or Very Mad



or should i have just went off? Shocked haha. i really do hope she understands.




later.
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spliff



Joined: 19 Jan 2004
Location: Khon Kaen, Thailand

PostPosted: Tue Mar 23, 2004 10:01 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

cacheSurfer wrote:
wylde wrote:
givus an example bro




I have these 3 middle school student boys. Well, there really cool guys and we get along good. Their always talking about the computer game Starcraft and they wanted to teach me how the play the game. They all go the local PC bong after class every night. (when i say every night...i mean every night Very Happy )

Anyway, after class one night we were talking and they wanted me to go to the PC room with them. We walked across the street and played some Starcraft. No big deal right?

my K-coworker over heard our converstion and told my director that I was taking the students to bad places. Here's the deal. the students go there everynight...with or without me.

i just don't appreciate people talking about me.


I don't think you know this but going to PC bongs is considered a real "rent a future" activity in Korea! Wink
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Derrek



Joined: 15 Jan 2003

PostPosted: Wed Mar 24, 2004 1:23 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

the eye wrote:
Hey.

If the k-teacher was attacking my teaching style...I would go to her with a question like this.....
"hi, XXX. How are you? Are you busy? Well, i hear you have a problem with my teaching style. It would be much more professional, and helpful to me and the students if you would discuss the issue with ME first. Maybe you have some suggestions on how i can fix the problem?
She was shocked and her ego was fed at the same time...it was great to watch her spew the *beep*.


I am willing to venture that another thing could happen to you. It could backfire, and this Korean teacher will go to your boss and say, "He has no idea how to teach, so he's asking around for advice. Why do you let him work here?"
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shawner88



Joined: 01 Feb 2003

PostPosted: Wed Mar 24, 2004 1:27 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

osangrl wrote:
One of my k-coworkers is a tattletale too, but in a good way.

On friday i said: "god i hate my fridge its too small"
she told on me, and today they delivered a new fridge.

Same once with wanting a watercooler, and again when i was upset about a snotty student, he removed her from my class permanently.

I love tattletales!


I want your job. It sounds even better than mine.
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rapier



Joined: 16 Feb 2003

PostPosted: Wed Mar 24, 2004 4:55 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

cacheSurfer wrote:
**here is my follow-up...

well, after classes tonight i approached the subject and asked if she had a problem with me. she said that she didn't....so i asked her why she kept talking about me.

her response was that...she didnt mean for it to cause any problems. the girl said she was sorry and we ended the conversation.

i didn't loose my cool. i kept it short and simple.


the next time it happens i will have to start yelling. i gave my warning and hopefully everything is goes smooth. (only 1 warning) Evil or Very Mad



or should i have just went off? Shocked haha. i really do hope she understands.




later.


well done... clearly she was spineless creep....
I had a similar showdown a couple of months back, a bit more savage. A co-teacher had made herself my self-appointed boss...after the blowout, she never spoke to me for a month. I explained everything to the other teachers as well, the focus suddenly fell fair and square on her... worked a treat. She's left now, obviously dissapointed that there was nobody left to push around....
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Harvard Material



Joined: 25 Feb 2003
Location: Seoul

PostPosted: Wed Mar 24, 2004 10:49 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Cache; the next time - if you are unfortunate enough to be caught up in a next time - you don't do any yelling at her. You get someone else to yell for you. It will be taken much more seriously...believe me. Get a representative to yell for you on your behalf. Preferably a representative not related to the workplace.
I hope your prob's are now over with 'c'-worker, but it could be a sham on her part. Don't waste anymore breath on her. You talked to her and took the civil route. If she doesn't appreciate it?

When a person looks for a fight they deserve to be in one.
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