Korean Job Discussion Forums

[grnmle]

I've written almost two pages over the last week after learning how hard it would be to get back into Korea after being there. I was there in 2007-8

I spent two years between then and now in Japan teaching also. I worked for GEOS when it imploded and went bankrupt. I've tried to make the best of it in the shitty economy. Right now it feels I am not really wanted anywhere and I don't want to work for a living at something I have no control over so I decided to write my story.....Please have a read. Tell me what you think. I look forward to hearing some criticism.


....My last excursion in North America was a trip across the line to a baseball game in Seattle with my cousin. The Mariners were playing the Blue Jays. We left early on the Friday intending only to watch a game and head back after. We pre-gamed hard. We drank at a beer an inning pace. I don't remember who won the game. Big planes passed low overhead. The smell of garlic fries never ceased. I remember there were no home runs. I learned that Safeco Field was not a place for power hitters.

We walked out after the game and collected our vehicle. He was a rep for a sunflower seed company. It was easy to spot his vehicle with it's logoed exterior. We would never make it through the border in our condition. I didn't want to feel condomed fingers near my ass. It was any easy decision to continue drinking while we settled on finding a hotel.

We made our way through Seattle. I still know very little about the city. It looks like a really decent place but, I know it only from stories and from the news that crosses over the border into BC. I've never spent more than a few days there in my life though it really is so close. I'd only gone to a couple of ball games there, separated by decades. The last time I went the King Dome was the home of the Mariners and Ichiro Suzuki wasn't on every TV in Japan (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0-IMdmT4Y4o)

We turned south to look for a hotel near Seatac Airport. We couldn't seem to find anything. Every hotel was booked one conference or another. We decided to try our luck a little further south. We took a wrong exit and ended up back at the strip of hotels that lead to the airport. It was dumb, drunken luck.

We hadn't tried the Hilton. It looked too expensive. It might be a little too swank for what we were after. We didn't have a choice.

We pulled up outside and he went in and quickly came out. I thought to myself, "Damn ---- That was too quick. We are going to have to sleep it off in this truck."

As he came closer I noticed he had a smile. He held the keys up. We were in luck. "It's a shit show in there." he said. "There's another conference...But, we got a room."
"Oh yeah?" I stopped listening after I knew we had a bed. "Can you reach the beer?"

"Yeah." He said, he passed me one from the back seat and we drove to a parking spot.

"The lounge is open?" I asked. "I have an incredible thirst for more drinks."

"Yeah -- we'll be needing a couple drinks."

We drove to our room in another building across the parking lot. We cleaned up and headed back to the main building. I could tell something strange was working on my cousin. He pounded back a can of Bud. He choked a little.

"You all right?"

"I don't know..." He began to chuckle.

Before opening the glass door I looked down the hall. I scratched my head "...The fxxx?" I couldn't believe my eyes. "Where are we?" I asked myself.

Little people were walking everywhere. There were a few normal sized people, at least, enough for comparison's sake. I shook my head. I opened the door and walked in the back of the main hotel. It was normal hotel down to the carpet. Nothing special to see at all, except for the flood.

My cousin was doubled over, crying. He held his gut. I thought he was going to throw up. But, he was laughing.

"Let's get that drink." I said. "We're going to need it."

He barely made it through the door. He slipped behind an alcove to hide himself. He needed more time than I did to adjust.

"Deep breaths." I offered. I was having a hard time keeping composed. It was surreal.

Each of us would have to steel himself if we were going to make it to the lounge not 100 feet away.

"Pull yourself together."

A family came out past us. There were two large parents and two little kids. The little kids were teenagers. They came up to my hip. More and more of them streamed passed us. They were leaving the opening of the conference. They were jubilant. They tottered. Random tall folk stood out like cruise ships on calm water.

We held up the wall. The flood of little people abated slightly. I pretended to tie my shoe.

After a minute or so we walked down the hall to the lounge. We were both on the edge of unstoppable laughter. Somehow we maintained enough to order drinks. The lounge was filled with little people. We'd have to adjust.

We settled in to our beverages. We made friends with a little dude. I remember he had something funny written on his shirt. He introduced us to his people. We drank on.

You had no idea you'd be drinking at Willy Wonka's tonight did you boys? He asked us with a smile.

My cousin spit his drink on the little guys face. He couldn't contain himself. I looked up at the pretty young waitress, who stood there to take our order. She was also locked in to the madness. Her legs began to shake like she was going to pee herself. I started laughing. The laughter was contagious.

The little guy knew it too. He started laughing. "I work in Las Vegas," he said. "I've seen some crazy shit --- I totally understand. But, this I dream about this. I've never been near so many people like me in all of my life.I am going to get silly this weekend. See that girl?" His eyes glazed over.

I pulled out a cigar. I said to no one in particular. "Okay to smoke?"

[Louis VI]

I didn't finish your post but the last line is interesting.

[grnmle]

You missed a lot of meat then...

[DorkothyParker]

It looked too expensive.
This is just an example, but show, don't tell.
I remember he had something funny written on his shirt.
Again. What was so funny?

Unless you are doing NaNoWriMo and need the word count, see where you can cut out some Is.

Improper use of ellipses (unless you are trying to show the characters said something else and are simply cutting it out?). Use - instead.

Is there a reason your cousin doesn't have a name?

Before opening the glass door I looked down the hall. I scratched my head "...The fxxx?" I couldn't believe my eyes. "Where are we?" I asked myself.
You can cut out "I asked myself" because we already know it's you talking. I know it's first person, but the Is are killing me, Smalls.

Just from the excerpt, it seems fine. I think you should try to write as much as you can, though, and save editing for when you are done. It's just easier to keep the flow. Looks good, Bro.

PS. I see this is Non-fiction, but you should consider doing NaNoWriMo as a rebel just for the camaraderie and encouragement.

[Pa Jan Jo A Hamnida]

I always wondered if some clever Canadian ever received a grant for writing such a story.

[DorkothyParker]

Actually, it occurs to me that most people don't read this genre (memoir) unless it's a celebrity, well-known writer, or historical persons.
I recommend you either A. Fictionalize it to make it feel more accessible. Also you can include interesting cultural notes about Korea without having to put all the how, when and whoms of reality (which can be dull).
or B. Set it up as a series of short humorous stories as opposed to a chronological order. These will pack more of a punch and be more entertaining if written well. (Think David Sedaris).

The reason I say this is because most people can read blogs about general experiences. Unless you have something that makes YOU amazing in this capacity (IE. being a celebrity, being a true expert, possessing unusual attributes that make your situation unique, like being trans), it just isn't that interesting.

Hope this helps as well.

[Fox]

Dorothy is completely correct, and I think fictionalization is the stronger of her two suggestions. No matter how you present your experiences, it's very unlikely that they'll be sufficiently entertaining to sell a book, especially when bloggers are giving away the same or better quality anecdotes for free.

A fictional story meant to convey something of the essence of what a foreigner experiences in Korea has some possibility of being of interest.

[jammo]

I found it quite dreary

[asc422]

Korea???????

[erasmus]

Did any of you read what he wrote?

Al the comments seem to be about the idea of writing about one's experience in Korea (reviewing the title) but no one seems to have noticed that the OP's piece is not about Korea, not even about any sane person's experience of waking reality. It seems to me more like a dream he had the night after watching Mulholland Drive.

I think the story is somewhat interesting in that the writing is really bad, especially at the beginning, and this leaves the reader unprepared for the wierdness that follows. The innocence and misleading information with which the story is introduced also helps in this regard. The story leaves me wondering how much of it is a ruse and how much is purposeful effect. This is good. I would be moderately interested in reading more (but not too much more, I wouldn't think).

[Hotwire]

Dp hit it smack on the nogin.

No one wants to read a memoir unless it is

a. by someone famous

b. About some well known and unusual / frightening / once in a lifetime kiond of event.

c. Is subversive - ie 'The Diary of a Nobody.'

I'm not saying you can't write a novel based on Korea. look what david Mitchel did with his travels in asia in ghost written!

But basically if you take Korea out of the story and nothing of much note happens.. well you just have a jumped up diary....

A good novel basically should work no matter where it is set (although yes a setting itself can be used as a character of sorts.)

Erasmus - you have too much trust in humanity my firend. A virtue, but one that will not thank you!