Korean Job Discussion Forums

[fromtheuk]

In my experience, I dreaded coming home. I was unsure who I couldn't stand the most: my co-teacher or my wife.

There was no affection, long periods where my wife just wouldn't talk to me at all. No communication.

I basically wanted the earth to swallow me up or for me to not be in this situation any longer. I also started to think, 'How can I get rid of this person?'

That's when it dawned me, this has to end. I feared if I didn't get a divorce, I may lose it at some stage and do something very, very bad.

I felt quite devastated. I'd gone into the marriage with good intentions and high hopes. It all turned pear-shaped very quickly. I still feel the process of divorce killed me a little.

On that 'uplifting' note, what made you realize it was time for a divorce?

[cragesmure]

Wow, I'm 31 and never been married, simply because I've never felt that I wanted to spend my entire life with 1 person. Guess I was right...
Just curious, how long were you with her before you got married? How long were you with here before it went *beep* up? I don't mean to get personal, but you started it, to be fair.

[cragesmure]

Haha. I just got my first *beep* on Daves. I guess I can't say the "T" word. Sorry for that. It's also the name of an English bird, by the way. Let's see if "magpie" gets beeped...

[Illysook]

I felt like I should have broken it off before the wedding but I gave it my best effort for about 2 years. We were both pretty childish. I've stayed single ever since the divorce and it's been 16 years. I'm not unhappy, but I have realized that many things about that divorce were self destructive for me. Growing up is part of marriage and part of adulthood and being able to stick it out and work through the whole falling in and out of love that is known to happen throughout a 40, 50, or 60 year marriage is something that is admirable. Had I picked a healthier partner and been more of a grown-up myself, maybe I would have done that. I hope that I get another chance. Statistically, people will re-marry within 5 years and then 90 percent of second and third marriages end in divorce. That scares me, but I've beat the first stat, maybe I can beat the second. Still, if you can make your first marriage work, you should. It's the better bet.

[Louis VI]

shagging others is a big sign

[Panda]

If the person or the marriage was really that exhausting like what you said, how can you still not get out of it?

I don't know your story well, but several times in my life, I lost things or people I thought I wanted to get rid of and later found I was even bitter...

I tried to figure out why and then realized how much I ignored how good and important they were to me and only saw the negative sides. Once I got rid of the troubles, I also gave away all the warmth and happiness.

There are some relationships you need to give up, and some others you need to work on and fix it.


But OP, I hope you cheer up.

[Konglishman]

The first sign was when out of the blue, she started accusing of cheating when I had never done any such thing. Further, I could not help but feel alienated by her when she started spending much of her own time chatting with other guys online.

[eb]

When I kicked him.

[redaxe]

[BaldTeacher]

Marriage is something to be avoided in this day and age.

[Junior]

[nfld_chingu]

[samd]

[le-paul]

[Subtitle]

This will sound pretty crass, but it's the truth.
My ex was always a ball buster, and I was her complimentary milquetoast. But when she stopped putting out, it was really a no-brainer. If I wasn't going to get sex out of the deal, why put up with the bs?
When I told her I was going to divorce her, she picked up a cast iron skillet, and she raised it over her head in preparation to brain me with it. I landed my first ever punch right in her nose and drew blood.
My marriage was over.