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tideout
Joined: 12 Dec 2010
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 Posted: Wed Dec 22, 2010 5:37 am Post subject: |
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| Vagabundo wrote: |
| tideout wrote: |
I've honestly come to hate most all of the social stuff around eating in the school cafeteria.
The "need" to sit with a certain group of co-workers.
The "need" to rush eating because a senior person has a meeting and even though you've explained that it's ok for them to leave, they insist on staying while anxiously staring at your food waiting for it to be eaten etc...
Comments about not having something from every pan on the food line etc.. (Have they never heard of not liking something?).
God forbid you wanted a quiet lunch break on your own to read - a true sign of the apocalypse.
Lunch with co-workers is in the packet of things I'll be very glad to leave behind when I leave Korea. |
I've skillfully managed to avoid all of the above, yet still eat in the cafeteria each and every day  . The Koreans at my school seem a bit more open minded about my culture/feelings being different than many others here.
It's simply a very blatant example of important cultural differences, I always try to quell any "annoyed" feelings that may sometimes occur when Koreans are simply being well intentioned based on their own culture. (am not always successful, but I try)
The biggest one was to recently avoid having to eat with all the admin people all the time, every day. They're very nice and friendly and I do like them, but when they suggested we meet up at a certain place at a certain time for lunch each and every day.. I had to use SNIP. I'm now worried they feel jilted and insulted, so I'm going to get them all a little collective Christmas present.
re the senior person leaving, or even me having to leave early, that has never been an issue. If someone (even a junior) has to leave early, they bow, make and excuse and go though younger Koreans will only do this in extreme circumstances. I've never seen a senior expect everyone else to finish early if he does. If he does, and he has to go, he simply leaves. |
I'm sure some schools are different and no doubt there are individual Koreans who aren't uptight about it.
The idea though, that you need to buy a round of gifts to smooth over potentially hurt feelings because, god forbid, you had lunch w/ one of your co-teacher friends is exactly the kind of social subterfuge I'll be happy to leave in the rear view mirror.
Just to clarifly, I get your strategy on it - in the context of Korea it's perfectly "logical". |
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Vagabundo
Joined: 26 Aug 2010
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| Posted: Wed Dec 22, 2010 5:42 am Post subject: |
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| tideout wrote: |
| Vagabundo wrote: |
| tideout wrote: |
I've honestly come to hate most all of the social stuff around eating in the school cafeteria.
The "need" to sit with a certain group of co-workers.
The "need" to rush eating because a senior person has a meeting and even though you've explained that it's ok for them to leave, they insist on staying while anxiously staring at your food waiting for it to be eaten etc...
Comments about not having something from every pan on the food line etc.. (Have they never heard of not liking something?).
God forbid you wanted a quiet lunch break on your own to read - a true sign of the apocalypse.
Lunch with co-workers is in the packet of things I'll be very glad to leave behind when I leave Korea. |
I've skillfully managed to avoid all of the above, yet still eat in the cafeteria each and every day . The Koreans at my school seem a bit more open minded about my culture/feelings being different than many others here.
It's simply a very blatant example of important cultural differences, I always try to quell any "annoyed" feelings that may sometimes occur when Koreans are simply being well intentioned based on their own culture. (am not always successful, but I try)
The biggest one was to recently avoid having to eat with all the admin people all the time, every day. They're very nice and friendly and I do like them, but when they suggested we meet up at a certain place at a certain time for lunch each and every day.. I had to use SNIP. I'm now worried they feel jilted and insulted, so I'm going to get them all a little collective Christmas present.
re the senior person leaving, or even me having to leave early, that has never been an issue. If someone (even a junior) has to leave early, they bow, make and excuse and go though younger Koreans will only do this in extreme circumstances. I've never seen a senior expect everyone else to finish early if he does. If he does, and he has to go, he simply leaves. |
I'm sure some schools are different and no doubt there are individual Koreans who aren't uptight about it.
The idea though, that you need to buy a round of gifts to smooth over potentially hurt feelings because, god forbid, you had lunch w/ one of your co-teacher friends is exactly the kind of social subterfuge I'll be happy to leave in the rear view mirror.
Just to clarifly, I get your strategy on it - in the context of Korea it's perfectly "logical". |
don't get me wrong, I completely understand and am sympathetic to being "tired of it all".
I (often) am too.
but you've gotta take the bad with the good. I'd be a fool to complain about how I'm treated in my overall school/work situation so while remaining true to marching to my own drummer, I need to navigate the cultural differences to ensure no one is needlessly insulted/humiliated, etc |
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jonpurdy
Joined: 08 Jan 2009
Location: Ulsan
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| Posted: Wed Dec 22, 2010 5:56 am Post subject: |
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| tideout wrote: |
Comments about not having something from every pan on the food line etc.. (Have they never heard of not liking something?).
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Slightly OT, but I was wondering about this myself.
During breaks throughout the year, all sorts of different fruits, vegetables, and snacks are consumed depending on the season. Yet I've never seen a single teacher refuse to eat any of it! I've seen probably ten differents types of exotic fruit and everybody eats and enjoys it all! Don't people not like particular foods? I eat apples and oranges but I don't like pears or persimmons so I don't eat them (I just say allergy, which is true for the persimmons). How is it possible to like every type of fruit that is placed in front of you? |
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Vagabundo
Joined: 26 Aug 2010
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| Posted: Wed Dec 22, 2010 6:09 am Post subject: |
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| jonpurdy wrote: |
| tideout wrote: |
Comments about not having something from every pan on the food line etc.. (Have they never heard of not liking something?).
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Slightly OT, but I was wondering about this myself.
During breaks throughout the year, all sorts of different fruits, vegetables, and snacks are consumed depending on the season. Yet I've never seen a single teacher refuse to eat any of it! I've seen probably ten differents types of exotic fruit and everybody eats and enjoys it all! Don't people not like particular foods? I eat apples and oranges but I don't like pears or persimmons so I don't eat them (I just say allergy, which is true for the persimmons). How is it possible to like every type of fruit that is placed in front of you? |
I've wondered about this myself. I can't believe everyone in Korea likes rice and kimchi either.
( I did a student poll in some of my classes once, and found out they're generally far more fond of their rice than their kimchi btw)
Someone suggested on a similar thread a while back that Korean taste buds are conditioned to be different since childbirth, ergo they're predispositioned to like certain foods, or spices, or more spicy food in general.
I'm suspicious of the logic because in my own personal case, there are many many meals/dishes from my home "ethnic" cuisine that I ate/was forced to eat as a child that I've never liked and don't like to this day and now simply won't eat them.
granted, I am a finicky eater, even for a Westerner. Must partially explain my love for cats
My suspicions as to the reason(s) would lie more along the lines of Confucianist allegiance to group over the individual (for Koreans, obviously).
If the "group" is enjoying a certain meal, food or fruit, etc you'd be disturbing the group's "harmony" by blatantly displaying distaste or displeasure over what's being eaten/offered. You'd also be risking embarrassing/shaming the person who offered the food/fruit to the group, causing him/her to lose face. |
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NYC_Gal 2.0
Joined: 10 Dec 2010
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| Posted: Wed Dec 22, 2010 6:18 am Post subject: |
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Bring them all licorice and pretend that you didn't know that 4 out of 5 Korean people despise the stuff.
Heck, many westerners hate the stuff. |
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Vagabundo
Joined: 26 Aug 2010
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| Posted: Wed Dec 22, 2010 6:51 am Post subject: |
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| NYC_Gal 2.0 wrote: |
Bring them all licorice and pretend that you didn't know that 4 out of 5 Korean people despise the stuff.
Heck, many westerners hate the stuff. |
ooh! good "evil" trick! 
I loathe that crap myself.
(could make for an interesting cultural experiment. See how many refuse, how many accept, then hide/throw away the stuff, etc who nibbles, etc etc) |
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tideout
Joined: 12 Dec 2010
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| Posted: Wed Dec 22, 2010 7:07 am Post subject: |
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| Vagabundo wrote: |
| jonpurdy wrote: |
| tideout wrote: |
Comments about not having something from every pan on the food line etc.. (Have they never heard of not liking something?).
|
Slightly OT, but I was wondering about this myself.
During breaks throughout the year, all sorts of different fruits, vegetables, and snacks are consumed depending on the season. Yet I've never seen a single teacher refuse to eat any of it! I've seen probably ten differents types of exotic fruit and everybody eats and enjoys it all! Don't people not like particular foods? I eat apples and oranges but I don't like pears or persimmons so I don't eat them (I just say allergy, which is true for the persimmons). How is it possible to like every type of fruit that is placed in front of you? |
I've wondered about this myself. I can't believe everyone in Korea likes rice and kimchi either.
( I did a student poll in some of my classes once, and found out they're generally far more fond of their rice than their kimchi btw)
Someone suggested on a similar thread a while back that Korean taste buds are conditioned to be different since childbirth, ergo they're predispositioned to like certain foods, or spices, or more spicy food in general.
I'm suspicious of the logic because in my own personal case, there are many many meals/dishes from my home "ethnic" cuisine that I ate/was forced to eat as a child that I've never liked and don't like to this day and now simply won't eat them.
granted, I am a finicky eater, even for a Westerner. Must partially explain my love for cats
My suspicions as to the reason(s) would lie more along the lines of Confucianist allegiance to group over the individual (for Koreans, obviously).
If the "group" is enjoying a certain meal, food or fruit, etc you'd be disturbing the group's "harmony" by blatantly displaying distaste or displeasure over what's being eaten/offered. You'd also be risking embarrassing/shaming the person who offered the food/fruit to the group, causing him/her to lose face. |
I get what you're saying I just find the whole deal bizarre. Can you imagine going to a salad bar with your friends in your country and noticing someone didn't have any of the little tomatoes w/ the tossed salad - Hey what's wrong you didn't take any tomatoes!!!
I've had this happen here.
Fascinating as it may be for some, I really don't give a cr*p what other people take while going through the salad line......
I get a lot of Koreans like kimchi but so what?
Can you imagine gossiping about the new foreign exchange student on your campus or in your community. He's having a rough time fitting in here because he doesn't like .........the hamburgers.
I may be way off but I see some of this as a weird form of provincialism. A few Koreans have told me that they really dislike foriegn food. One even told me he brought boxes of ramen with him when he and his wife went to Vegas. God forbid they had to put up with linguine (oh my!) |
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SparkleKorea
Joined: 05 Dec 2010
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| Posted: Wed Dec 22, 2010 4:38 pm Post subject: |
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| Working with uni students is best because they just give candy bars and canned coffee. You can just take home what you don't eat at the moment! |
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NYC_Gal 2.0
Joined: 10 Dec 2010
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| Posted: Wed Dec 22, 2010 5:04 pm Post subject: |
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| Vagabundo wrote: |
| NYC_Gal 2.0 wrote: |
Bring them all licorice and pretend that you didn't know that 4 out of 5 Korean people despise the stuff.
Heck, many westerners hate the stuff. |
ooh! good "evil" trick!
I loathe that crap myself.
(could make for an interesting cultural experiment. See how many refuse, how many accept, then hide/throw away the stuff, etc who nibbles, etc etc) |
Act hurt if they say no. Wait until they put it in their mouth, like they always do to you. Another poster suggested Good n Plenty (which I'll have to have sent) because it has the candy coating so it's a surprise. I always offer licorice allsorts, but this seems much funnier. My head coteacher had some friends visiting, who are somewhat-higher-ups in the government. I made them some tea, then offered them licorice. It was VERY funny. |
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redaxe
Joined: 01 Dec 2008
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| Posted: Wed Dec 22, 2010 5:27 pm Post subject: |
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| tideout wrote: |
I may be way off but I see some of this as a weird form of provincialism. A few Koreans have told me that they really dislike foriegn food. One even told me he brought boxes of ramen with him when he and his wife went to Vegas. God forbid they had to put up with linguine (oh my!) |
The most ridiculous thing I saw was a couple who had a photo album full of pictures of them travelling all over the world and making their own kimchi jjigae in each place. They had photos of themselves eating kimchi jjigae in France, Holland, Germany, Canada, Thailand, Vietnam, etc. etc. |
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carleverson
Joined: 04 Dec 2009
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| Posted: Wed Dec 22, 2010 7:02 pm Post subject: |
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Write "NO FOOD" on your forehead.
Problem solved. |
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offtheoche
Joined: 21 Mar 2007
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| Posted: Wed Dec 22, 2010 7:21 pm Post subject: |
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| My uni students once gave me some kimbap, which I hate. I sneakily threw it out the window when nobody was looking. |
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bobbybigfoot
Joined: 05 May 2007
Location: Seoul
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| Posted: Wed Dec 22, 2010 7:29 pm Post subject: |
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I just say "no, thank you. I'm watching my weight." Then pat my belly. "But thank you for asking." And give a genuine smile. I try and say their name as well.
I never get any problems. |
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NYC_Gal 2.0
Joined: 10 Dec 2010
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| Posted: Wed Dec 22, 2010 8:44 pm Post subject: |
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다이어트 해요 (diet-uh hay-yo)
It means I'm dieting. Even if you're fit, to Koreans you're probably "fat" so they'll let you pass on food. If it's fruit and you're not allergic, though, just take it and pass it off to the kids in the playground later. |
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fortysixyou
Joined: 08 Jun 2006
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| Posted: Wed Dec 22, 2010 9:14 pm Post subject: |
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When offered a snack, take it, then give it to the nearest student. Students are always hungry.
I had a problematic teenage girl student back in '08. One time I gave her a pastry I wasn't hungry for, and it melted her heart. She was a sweetheart for the rest of the year. |
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