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PatrickGHBusan
Joined: 24 Jun 2008
Location: Busan (1997-2008) Canada 2008 -
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 Posted: Thu Apr 28, 2011 4:24 am Post subject: |
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| madowlspeaks wrote: |
| PatrickGHBusan wrote: |
Sorry to hear about your impending divorce.
Bascially you need a lawyer. There is a child involved and custody laws in Korea are pretty precise. You need to get informed fast and make sure you know what your rights are and also what your responsibilities will be!
I know of a few people who divorced in Korea. Some were mixed couples and some were Korean. If memory serves, and I could be wrong, child custody went to the fathers by default.
Since you are a foreigner in Korea (no idea of your visa status) things may be different.
So, talk to a lawyer (the US embassy site has some links) asap.
As for this forum, this is just my two cents but I would refrain from sharing so much information on here. Some people have been burnt by this place in the past because they posted too much personal information.
Good luck to you, to your wife and most of all to your daughter. She is the one who will suffer the most in all this, as parents, even if you hate each other, you have to put that aside when it comes to her and think of her welfare first and before anything else.
Then again, I am sure you know this.
Good luck. |
Let's say a foreign woman (Canadian) and a Korean man get divorced in Korea. Do Korean laws dictate that the father will get the child/children??
What about the child's citizenship? If they have two kinds what then? |
No idea sorry. Hence I advised the OP to get a lawyer. |
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matthews_world
Joined: 15 Feb 2003
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| Posted: Thu Apr 28, 2011 2:03 pm Post subject: |
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OP, realize that the above posters are not advocating divorce, just giving you the facts.
Hell, we're not even licensed psychologists. The purpose of this board should be used just for entertainment.
See a licensed psychologist before you make the worst decision in your life. |
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winterfall
Joined: 21 May 2009
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| Posted: Thu Apr 28, 2011 5:14 pm Post subject: |
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Be careful about the citizenship thing. Your child is a girl right? Then it's better to keep the dual citizenship. Marital status shouldn't matter, the citizenship was passed by blood. I'm assuming your wife didn't formally renounce hers when you had your kid right? Then your kid is half Korean and whatever you are. As long as you did the paper work with the embassy.
They're planning to change the law in the coming 5 years or so to legally allow dual citizenship. So by the time your daughter grows up she'll be covered under Korean health care. Right now Korea doesn't formally recognize it. If your a Korean citizen with dual citizenship or a green card for another country, you don't qualify for health care.
However, if it's a boy. You've gotta take steps now to strike his name off the hojuk and get rid of his Korean citizenship. Otherwise he'll get drafted when he gets older or you'll have to remind him on his 18th birthday, he's got a 90 day window to pick his citizenship, otherwise by default he'll have to do service before he can renounce Korean citizenship |
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vDroop
Joined: 25 Aug 2010
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| Posted: Thu Apr 28, 2011 9:23 pm Post subject: Re: Where do we go to get a divorce in Korea? |
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deleted
Last edited by vDroop on Mon Aug 01, 2011 8:45 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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Yaya
Joined: 25 Feb 2003
Location: Seoul
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| Posted: Thu Apr 28, 2011 10:26 pm Post subject: |
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| Geez, feels great to be single after hearing some of these horror stories. |
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PatrickGHBusan
Joined: 24 Jun 2008
Location: Busan (1997-2008) Canada 2008 -
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| Posted: Fri Apr 29, 2011 5:37 am Post subject: |
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| Yaya wrote: |
| Geez, feels great to be single after hearing some of these horror stories. |
I imagine so. Then again, there are also great stories out there about married people.
I assume it balances it out. |
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The Cosmic Hum
Joined: 09 May 2003
Location: Sonic Space
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| Posted: Fri Apr 29, 2011 8:23 am Post subject: |
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| PatrickGHBusan wrote: |
| Yaya wrote: |
| Geez, feels great to be single after hearing some of these horror stories. |
I imagine so. Then again, there are also great stories out there about married people.
I assume it balances it out. |
...you know what they say about people who assume. |
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PatrickGHBusan
Joined: 24 Jun 2008
Location: Busan (1997-2008) Canada 2008 -
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| Posted: Fri Apr 29, 2011 9:51 am Post subject: |
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| The Cosmic Hum wrote: |
| PatrickGHBusan wrote: |
| Yaya wrote: |
| Geez, feels great to be single after hearing some of these horror stories. |
I imagine so. Then again, there are also great stories out there about married people.
I assume it balances it out. |
...you know what they say about people who assume. |
Sure I do.
You know what they say about people who reach conclusions based on one post?  |
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Yaya
Joined: 25 Feb 2003
Location: Seoul
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| Posted: Sun May 01, 2011 3:33 pm Post subject: |
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Only I'm not basing my hypothesis on just one post. I've had other non-Korean expat friends (and Korean) who've had horrible marriages and such (though some of the expats were at fault, too).
I think part of the problem could be that Korean women just expect too much from their men, and when that expectation is not met, they can lose it majorly. Of course, the man should make enough money to support the wife and family but in Korea, it seems a guy's future prospects simply trumps everything else, including genuine love and feelings for one's partner. |
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PatrickGHBusan
Joined: 24 Jun 2008
Location: Busan (1997-2008) Canada 2008 -
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| Posted: Sun May 01, 2011 4:28 pm Post subject: |
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| Yaya wrote: |
Only I'm not basing my hypothesis on just one post. I've had other non-Korean expat friends (and Korean) who've had horrible marriages and such (though some of the expats were at fault, too).
I think part of the problem could be that Korean women just expect too much from their men, and when that expectation is not met, they can lose it majorly. Of course, the man should make enough money to support the wife and family but in Korea, it seems a guy's future prospects simply trumps everything else, including genuine love and feelings for one's partner. |
That does happen but I would not say its the majority or the norm.
Also, its not just about the woman's expectations...its a two way street my friend. In any marriage it is equally up to the woman and the man to make it work and to be on the lookout for their spouses needs and expectations.
Still, a lot of marriages fail, mixed or other, for many reasons because frankly speaking a long and happy relationship takes work. Many people confuse effort at maintaining and growing a relationship with a sign its not meant to be....thats called the hollywood love syndrome which can be summed up with: real love requires no effort.
This is an interesting discussion anyway. I have been married 13 years now and my Korean wife is not "too demanding" nor does she have "unreasonable expectations". We have our ups and downs but are happy together.
In the vast majority of cases, couples that fail do so with an equal share of responsibility from each spouse. It is exceedingly rare to see responsibility lie with one partner only.... |
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Yaya
Joined: 25 Feb 2003
Location: Seoul
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| Posted: Sun May 01, 2011 9:23 pm Post subject: |
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| PatrickGHBusan wrote: |
| Yaya wrote: |
Only I'm not basing my hypothesis on just one post. I've had other non-Korean expat friends (and Korean) who've had horrible marriages and such (though some of the expats were at fault, too).
I think part of the problem could be that Korean women just expect too much from their men, and when that expectation is not met, they can lose it majorly. Of course, the man should make enough money to support the wife and family but in Korea, it seems a guy's future prospects simply trumps everything else, including genuine love and feelings for one's partner. |
That does happen but I would not say its the majority or the norm.
Also, its not just about the woman's expectations...its a two way street my friend. In any marriage it is equally up to the woman and the man to make it work and to be on the lookout for their spouses needs and expectations.
Still, a lot of marriages fail, mixed or other, for many reasons because frankly speaking a long and happy relationship takes work. Many people confuse effort at maintaining and growing a relationship with a sign its not meant to be....thats called the hollywood love syndrome which can be summed up with: real love requires no effort.
This is an interesting discussion anyway. I have been married 13 years now and my Korean wife is not "too demanding" nor does she have "unreasonable expectations". We have our ups and downs but are happy together.
In the vast majority of cases, couples that fail do so with an equal share of responsibility from each spouse. It is exceedingly rare to see responsibility lie with one partner only.... |
Lots of opinion, little stats to back it up.
Anyway, let's not hijack the OP. He just wants to divorce his wife and end his nightmare. |
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PatrickGHBusan
Joined: 24 Jun 2008
Location: Busan (1997-2008) Canada 2008 -
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| Posted: Mon May 02, 2011 3:55 am Post subject: |
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[quote="Yaya"]
| PatrickGHBusan wrote: |
| Yaya wrote: |
Only I'm not basing my hypothesis on just one post. I've had other non-Korean expat friends (and Korean) who've had horrible marriages and such (though some of the expats were at fault, too).
I think part of the problem could be that Korean women just expect too much from their men, and when that expectation is not met, they can lose it majorly. Of course, the man should make enough money to support the wife and family but in Korea, it seems a guy's future prospects simply trumps everything else, including genuine love and feelings for one's partner. |
That does happen but I would not say its the majority or the norm.
Also, its not just about the woman's expectations...its a two way street my friend. In any marriage it is equally up to the woman and the man to make it work and to be on the lookout for their spouses needs and expectations.
Still, a lot of marriages fail, mixed or other, for many reasons because frankly speaking a long and happy relationship takes work. Many people confuse effort at maintaining and growing a relationship with a sign its not meant to be....thats called the hollywood love syndrome which can be summed up with: real love requires no effort.
This is an interesting discussion anyway. I have been married 13 years now and my Korean wife is not "too demanding" nor does she have "unreasonable expectations". We have our ups and downs but are happy together.
In the vast majority of cases, couples that fail do so with an equal share of responsibility from each spouse. It is exceedingly rare to see responsibility lie with one partner only.... |
double post.
Last edited by PatrickGHBusan on Mon May 02, 2011 3:57 am; edited 2 times in total |
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PatrickGHBusan
Joined: 24 Jun 2008
Location: Busan (1997-2008) Canada 2008 -
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| Posted: Mon May 02, 2011 3:56 am Post subject: |
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| Yaya wrote: |
| PatrickGHBusan wrote: |
| Yaya wrote: |
Only I'm not basing my hypothesis on just one post. I've had other non-Korean expat friends (and Korean) who've had horrible marriages and such (though some of the expats were at fault, too).
I think part of the problem could be that Korean women just expect too much from their men, and when that expectation is not met, they can lose it majorly. Of course, the man should make enough money to support the wife and family but in Korea, it seems a guy's future prospects simply trumps everything else, including genuine love and feelings for one's partner. |
That does happen but I would not say its the majority or the norm.
Also, its not just about the woman's expectations...its a two way street my friend. In any marriage it is equally up to the woman and the man to make it work and to be on the lookout for their spouses needs and expectations.
Still, a lot of marriages fail, mixed or other, for many reasons because frankly speaking a long and happy relationship takes work. Many people confuse effort at maintaining and growing a relationship with a sign its not meant to be....thats called the hollywood love syndrome which can be summed up with: real love requires no effort.
This is an interesting discussion anyway. I have been married 13 years now and my Korean wife is not "too demanding" nor does she have "unreasonable expectations". We have our ups and downs but are happy together.
In the vast majority of cases, couples that fail do so with an equal share of responsibility from each spouse. It is exceedingly rare to see responsibility lie with one partner only.... |
Lots of opinion, little stats to back it up.
Anyway, let's not hijack the OP. He just wants to divorce his wife and end his nightmare. |
There is one stat out there that seems to hold up in many countries: roughly 50% of marriages or relationships fail, usually withing the first 5-10 years.
That would then mean that roughly 50% of marriages and relationships to last...
Cheers |
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hondaicivic
Joined: 01 Jul 2010
Location: Daegu, South Korea
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| Posted: Mon May 02, 2011 3:56 am Post subject: |
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| PatrickGHBusan wrote: |
| Yaya wrote: |
| PatrickGHBusan wrote: |
| Yaya wrote: |
Only I'm not basing my hypothesis on just one post. I've had other non-Korean expat friends (and Korean) who've had horrible marriages and such (though some of the expats were at fault, too).
I think part of the problem could be that Korean women just expect too much from their men, and when that expectation is not met, they can lose it majorly. Of course, the man should make enough money to support the wife and family but in Korea, it seems a guy's future prospects simply trumps everything else, including genuine love and feelings for one's partner. |
That does happen but I would not say its the majority or the norm.
Also, its not just about the woman's expectations...its a two way street my friend. In any marriage it is equally up to the woman and the man to make it work and to be on the lookout for their spouses needs and expectations.
Still, a lot of marriages fail, mixed or other, for many reasons because frankly speaking a long and happy relationship takes work. Many people confuse effort at maintaining and growing a relationship with a sign its not meant to be....thats called the hollywood love syndrome which can be summed up with: real love requires no effort.
This is an interesting discussion anyway. I have been married 13 years now and my Korean wife is not "too demanding" nor does she have "unreasonable expectations". We have our ups and downs but are happy together.
In the vast majority of cases, couples that fail do so with an equal share of responsibility from each spouse. It is exceedingly rare to see responsibility lie with one partner only.... |
Lots of opinion, little stats to back it up.
Anyway, let's not hijack the OP. He just wants to divorce his wife and end his nightmare. |
True but there is one stat out there: roughoy 50% of marriage or long term relationships fail, usually within the first 5 years.
That means 50% work out
Cheers |
So who's feeling lucky?.... |
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Boodleheimer
Joined: 10 Mar 2006
Location: working undercover for the Man
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| Posted: Mon May 02, 2011 4:57 am Post subject: |
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| ZIFA wrote: |
| PatrickGHBusan wrote: |
| as parents, even if you hate each other, you have to put that aside when it comes to her and think of her welfare first and before anything else. |
Absolutely.
Anyone whose parents divorced when they were kids.. can often trace a significant negative, disadvantagous impact over their lives. |
interesting idea. personally, things would have been much worse if my parents had stayed together. |
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