Korean Job Discussion Forums

[isisaredead]

wow, i get called a thick c____ for giving someone the benefit of the doubt and trying to offer advice?

and people wonder why this forum has such a bad reputation.

[PastorYoon]

[ThingsComeAround]

[marsavalanche]

to those that offered advice, thanks. i was in between this forum and talking with my girlfriend (korean), just trying to get the best possible advice from both sides.

as for why I cared to help her, I guess it's a combination of the attitudes of domestic abuse from where I'm from and opening that door and defending her seemed like the *right* thing to do instinctively.

all trolls in this thread will be ignored. it's amazing how many people are riding my coattails on these forums.

lol

[akcrono]

[akcrono]

Can someone explain exactly HOW one would get in trouble defending a girl getting their ass beaten?

[Sticks]

Check the multitudes of threads and news articles detailing how foreigners get thrown into jail, fined or deported for trying to 'help' or 'break up' people or couples in being publicly abused. Tcheh, Korea.

[akcrono]

[brento1138]

I understand the situation the OP was in. Back in Canada, there's no way I wouldn't help someone, anyone, that was getting beat up. Especially a woman.

But in Korea, you do have to be careful. The laws here are completely different, and since you're a foreigner, you might not be able to communicate to the police about what happened. When there are two Koreans and one foreigner with bloody faces, the Korean cops are automatically going to believe the Korean's word over the foreigner's.

In a domestic abuse situation, where the woman continually "tests the man's love" where she pisses off the man, the man beats her, they make up, him proclaiming his love while she does the same (therefore strengthening the relationship in their warped minds), they'll totally blame you to try to save each other.

So, staying out of it wasn't such a bad idea. Calling the cops is obviously the best thing to do in that situation.

Unfortunately the law, the distrust I would have for the woman I was helping (she would most likely lie to the cops and say YOU were the bad guy), and the prejudiced cops... all those factors combined, no way I'm getting involved.

It's good to help people, but unfortunately the law, the people, and the situation here in Korea works completely against us to do what's right.

Not to mention the hospital bills if the two Korean men decided to make an example of you... plus adding on that, the blood money their families (and possibly the woman you were defending) would demand from you. Yikes.

[akcrono]

[thegadfly]

I've jumped in at 5 different times in my tenure in Korea. I never got a thank-you, of course, and 4 of those 5 times, the woman immediately jumped to defending the guy -- only once did the girl and guy walk away in different directions.

I never had a speck of trouble as a result of it, and I had the added bonus of being able to look at myself in the mirror. I can't control what the other man or the woman do, but I CAN control what *I* do, so I try to do what is right, not necessarily what is easy or "safe."

In the OP's defense, the very first time I witnessed such a scene, I remembered all the advice to "not get involved -- if someone gets hurt, you can get deported -- the cops will side with the Korean -- blah blah blah blah BS." I followed the advice, and just walked on...and I still feel bad about that. It is quite possibly the only thing I ever have regretted doing (or not doing) in Korea...and so when the situation arose again, I chose to act differently....

[Ruby Thursday]

[thegadfly]

[calicoe]

[Ruby Thursday]