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Question about school bullying
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Lost500



Joined: 24 Jul 2010

PostPosted: Mon Apr 09, 2012 6:12 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

fosterman wrote:
atwood wrote:
Theft is one common form of bullying. Taking all their money and sometimes clothing, for instance, NorthFace jackets.

They also make them do things like clean the floor or sidewalk with their tongues. There's more violence than you realize.

And, as posted above, those picked on too often commit suicide.


sad thing is, these kids must think their parents are weak and can't help.

my kids know I will never sit idle or try and resolve issues diplomatically

An eye for an eye!

and my kids know they don't have to fear bullys. cause if they get robbed or beaten up.

I will bring it!


'I will bring it'?? That teaches nothing! Fact is the 'victim' needs to learn to stand up fr themselves, you thinking you are solving anything is pure delusion.

I would say that there is too much of 'oh the victim, oh the poor kid' when often the victim deserves it. I have some students that get bullied & it is often down to them smelling horribly or just being weird kids.

More often than not the 'bullied' deserves it.
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cdninkorea



Joined: 27 Jan 2006
Location: Seoul

PostPosted: Mon Apr 09, 2012 8:49 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

In my experience, what a few posters have said here about the victims should learn how to stand up for themselves would work. I had plenty of friends in high school, but there were a few schoolmates who picked on me regularly. Once, in grade 10, I fought back and won; I was hit but unharmed, while my opponent had a bloody lip and had to get his braces fixed. After that he and his friends would look away when they saw me in the hall, which is all I wanted: to be left alone. Even the principal told my parents I did the right thing, though he still had to suspend me from school. Would this work in all cases? I don't know. I'm only suggesting that my actions might work for others.

If there's a group I'm not sure what the solution would be though, since unless you're Batman, you can't take a gang by yourself.
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cdninkorea



Joined: 27 Jan 2006
Location: Seoul

PostPosted: Mon Apr 09, 2012 9:01 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Lost500 wrote:
I have some students that get bullied & it is often down to them smelling horribly or just being weird kids.

More often than not the 'bullied' deserves it.


It makes sense for children not wanting to befriend those they perceive as weird or smelly, but to say they deserve bullying is absurd. The only appropriate use of physical force is against those who initiate it.
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Captain Corea



Joined: 28 Feb 2005
Location: Seoul

PostPosted: Mon Apr 09, 2012 9:46 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

cdninkorea wrote:
In my experience, what a few posters have said here about the victims should learn how to stand up for themselves would work. I had plenty of friends in high school, but there were a few schoolmates who picked on me regularly. Once, in grade 10, I fought back and won; I was hit but unharmed, while my opponent had a bloody lip and had to get his braces fixed. After that he and his friends would look away when they saw me in the hall, which is all I wanted: to be left alone. Even the principal told my parents I did the right thing, though he still had to suspend me from school. Would this work in all cases? I don't know. I'm only suggesting that my actions might work for others.

If there's a group I'm not sure what the solution would be though, since unless you're Batman, you can't take a gang by yourself.


That's the advice I've given my daughter on how to handle things too.

It's funny though, because when I talked to a number of Korean parents about this issue, NONE of them thought/mentioned self defense.
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motiontodismiss



Joined: 18 Dec 2011

PostPosted: Mon Apr 09, 2012 10:19 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Mix1 wrote:
motiontodismiss wrote:
fosterman wrote:


and my kids know they don't have to fear bullys. cause if they get robbed or beaten up.

I will bring it!


Seriously. I strongly oppose corporal punishment but I'd love nothing more than to have any school bully beaten half to death. Teachers and parents of the victim should be allowed to beat the living sh*t out of the kid doing the bullying.

So basically you are for it, just as long as you can choose the reason why it should be doled out.

I'm in agreement with you though.


Laughing Laughing That said, if my kid ever comes home with a black eye, I'll be buying him one of those police baton thingies (or a baseball bat or a piccolo or something that could be used as a weapon) and teaching him/her how to use it for self-defense.
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fermentation



Joined: 22 Jun 2009

PostPosted: Mon Apr 09, 2012 11:42 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Captain Corea wrote:

It's funny though, because when I talked to a number of Korean parents about this issue, NONE of them thought/mentioned self defense.


Must be a different generation. When I got bullied when I was 10, my dad kicked my ass for getting my ass kicked. Could also be the blood money issue.

Quote:
That said, if my kid ever comes home with a black eye, I'll be buying him one of those police baton thingies (or a baseball bat or a piccolo or something that could be used as a weapon) and teaching him/her how to use it for self-defense.


Teaching them to stand up for themselves is one thing, but give them a weapon might not go so well legally-speaking.
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motiontodismiss



Joined: 18 Dec 2011

PostPosted: Wed Apr 11, 2012 3:53 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

fermentation wrote:


Quote:
That said, if my kid ever comes home with a black eye, I'll be buying him one of those police baton thingies (or a baseball bat or a piccolo or something that could be used as a weapon) and teaching him/her how to use it for self-defense.


Teaching them to stand up for themselves is one thing, but give them a weapon might not go so well legally-speaking.


If I have kids, it will necessarily be in the States, where one has a near-absolute right of self-defense.
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TheUrbanMyth



Joined: 28 Jan 2003
Location: Retired

PostPosted: Wed Apr 11, 2012 4:04 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

motiontodismiss wrote:
fermentation wrote:


Quote:
That said, if my kid ever comes home with a black eye, I'll be buying him one of those police baton thingies (or a baseball bat or a piccolo or something that could be used as a weapon) and teaching him/her how to use it for self-defense.


Teaching them to stand up for themselves is one thing, but give them a weapon might not go so well legally-speaking.


If I have kids, it will necessarily be in the States, where one has a near-absolute right of self-defense.



It depends on the particular state. Some states have very strict laws governing self defense and the degree of force that can be used while other are laxer. Most states though frown on weapons being used unless it's to protect your life or something. I highly doubt most would regard a schoolyard brawl as life-threatening.
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motiontodismiss



Joined: 18 Dec 2011

PostPosted: Wed Apr 11, 2012 4:06 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

TheUrbanMyth wrote:
motiontodismiss wrote:
fermentation wrote:


Quote:
That said, if my kid ever comes home with a black eye, I'll be buying him one of those police baton thingies (or a baseball bat or a piccolo or something that could be used as a weapon) and teaching him/her how to use it for self-defense.


Teaching them to stand up for themselves is one thing, but give them a weapon might not go so well legally-speaking.


If I have kids, it will necessarily be in the States, where one has a near-absolute right of self-defense.



It depends on the particular state. Some states have very strict laws governing self defense and the degree of force that can be used while other are laxer. Most states though frown on weapons being used unless it's to protect your life or something. I highly doubt most would regard a schoolyard brawl as life-threatening.


The law frowns upon it, but that doesn't always lead to a guilty verdict. Besides, if I were to have kids, I'd send them off to a $30k a year private school and if I couldn't afford that, I'd never have them in the first place.
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Seoulman69



Joined: 14 Dec 2009

PostPosted: Wed Apr 11, 2012 8:37 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Do any of the parents here have experience of their child/children being bullied? I often wonder whether mixed race children would be more of a target.
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Yaya



Joined: 25 Feb 2003
Location: Seoul

PostPosted: Wed Apr 11, 2012 9:57 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Even worse is the parents of the bullies who balk at making amends with the victims. I heard one report about a boy who was bullied and had to go to the hospital for injuries, yet the parents of the bullies refused to help out with the medical costs.

The Korean government from next year will require that the perpetrators' parents cough up dough, but like any law in Korea, implementation will be the key.
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