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mcloo7
Joined: 20 Aug 2012
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 Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2012 7:21 am Post subject: Not drinking in Korea |
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| Hi, if you're someone who has quit drinking and doesn't intend to start again, meaning not even having one drink, what's life like in Korea? Are you ever pressured by a boss to drink, without any understanding of why you would choose to not drink, or can nondrinkers get by ok? Thanks. |
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Skippy
Joined: 18 Jan 2003
Location: Daejeon
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| Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2012 7:51 am Post subject: |
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Been discussed... many many many time
google and the words site:forums.eslcafe.com/korea non-drinking
http://forums.eslcafe.com/korea/viewtopic.php?p=2584716
http://forums.eslcafe.com/korea/viewtopic.php?p=823230
http://forums.eslcafe.com/korea/viewtopic.php?p=646260
In general there is some peer pressure. You just have to be very aware at times with it. Some situations might surprise you like you go out to dinner and out comes the soju. Drinking and eating go together at times.
Consider learning some survival Korean to say why you do not drink. Plus do think of some good excuses including lies to why you might not drink. Some people just will not get it. I do not eat carbs and seem to get offers of food all the time. My coworkers are getting the idea.
Careful with saying you are an alcoholic (if), they very likely might take it the wrong way (aka bad way).
Good Luck
edit: What the heck is wrong with me? pure/peer
Last edited by Skippy on Mon Aug 27, 2012 8:18 am; edited 1 time in total |
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mcloo7
Joined: 20 Aug 2012
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| Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2012 7:54 am Post subject: |
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| thanks, I did searches for it, but it never works when I type more than one word in the search bar, so I couldn't be specific enough |
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Skippy
Joined: 18 Jan 2003
Location: Daejeon
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| Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2012 8:08 am Post subject: |
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| mcloo7 wrote: |
| thanks, I did searches for it, but it never works when I type more than one word in the search bar, so I couldn't be specific enough |
The key is to avoid the search here on eslcafe. Use google and the words
site:forums.eslcafe.com WORDS YOU WANT TO SEARCH |
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mcloo7
Joined: 20 Aug 2012
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| Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2012 8:16 am Post subject: |
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| thanks |
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lemak
Joined: 02 Jan 2011
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| Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2012 9:23 am Post subject: |
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I ended up drinking like a fish in Korea. Booze was cheaper than water, but did used to go out with co-teachers or friends who didn't drink. They were always offered drinks from Koreans, but generally the locals didn't force the issue when they told them they don't drink - granted I tended to get invited out by the adjoshis a lot more than the non-drinking friends, however. Not just to bars, but on general social activities, hiking or whatever.
Not sure if you're a guy, McLoo or not, but the guys there really pride themselves on their drinking prowess. One of the first questions in adult classes was often "How many bottles of soju can you drink?", and like how we were back home in university and crap they do tend to judge each other based on drinking "skills".
Korean men generally like alcohol, and it's a big part of their culture, but I never noticed anyone forcing it down people's (especially foreigners) throats. |
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mcloo7
Joined: 20 Aug 2012
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| Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2012 9:42 am Post subject: |
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| lemak wrote: |
I ended up drinking like a fish in Korea. Booze was cheaper than water, but did used to go out with co-teachers or friends who didn't drink. They were always offered drinks from Koreans, but generally the locals didn't force the issue when they told them they don't drink - granted I tended to get invited out by the adjoshis a lot more than the non-drinking friends, however. Not just to bars, but on general social activities, hiking or whatever.
Not sure if you're a guy, McLoo or not, but the guys there really pride themselves on their drinking prowess. One of the first questions in adult classes was often "How many bottles of soju can you drink?", and like how we were back home in university and crap they do tend to judge each other based on drinking "skills".
Korean men generally like alcohol, and it's a big part of their culture, but I never noticed anyone forcing it down people's (especially foreigners) throats. |
I am a guy. Thanks for the insight. |
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toby99
Joined: 28 Aug 2009
Location: Dong-Incheon-by-the-sea, South Korea
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| Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2012 10:48 am Post subject: |
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| lemak wrote: |
I ended up drinking like a fish in Korea. Booze was cheaper than water, but did used to go out with co-teachers or friends who didn't drink. They were always offered drinks from Koreans, but generally the locals didn't force the issue when they told them they don't drink - granted I tended to get invited out by the adjoshis a lot more than the non-drinking friends, however. Not just to bars, but on general social activities, hiking or whatever.
Not sure if you're a guy, McLoo or not, but the guys there really pride themselves on their drinking prowess. One of the first questions in adult classes was often "How many bottles of soju can you drink?", and like how we were back home in university and crap they do tend to judge each other based on drinking "skills".
Korean men generally like alcohol, and it's a big part of their culture, but I never noticed anyone forcing it down people's (especially foreigners) throats. |
This is about right I think. I drink like a madman over here. 4-5 nights a week with about 3 bottles of soju and 2000-3000cc's of Cass per outing (sometimes less, but usually much more). I was a pretty good drinker fresh off the boat, but my drinking has at least doubled since landing on the peninsula. It's sort of a vicious cycle because I now get contacted on a near-daily basis by all the adjosshis at my school, asking me to come out boozing. I get all kinds of perks for going (lots of free anju and booze, comped booking clubs, even golf and other trips throughout the country, like skiing and hiking). Some other perks are that I have a great relationship with my school and they will cut me a lot of slack if I just feel like letting the co-teacher "take control" of the lesson due to a hangover or whatever. I also get out of a lot of the little camps and various "extra" lessons that pop up during the year. If you don't booze, you'll have to find another way to get similar perks.
My advice would be to tell people right off the bat you don't drink for health reasons. Say something like "my liver is shot and I can't process alcohol anymore- no booze, doctor's orders" etc, and never ever let a drop of booze hit your lips in front of others. Once people see it hit your lips, it's very easy to get swept down booze river, if you will, and good luck swimming out of the current. I definitely don't think Korea is any place for a recovering alcoholic, or anyone with that alcoholic 'gene' in their family. |
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mcloo7
Joined: 20 Aug 2012
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| Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2012 11:02 am Post subject: |
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| toby99 wrote: |
This is about right I think. I drink like a madman over here. 4-5 nights a week with about 3 bottles of soju and 2000-3000cc's of Cass per outing (sometimes less, but usually much more). I was a pretty good drinker fresh off the boat, but my drinking has at least doubled since landing on the peninsula. It's sort of a vicious cycle because I now get contacted on a near-daily basis by all the adjosshis at my school, asking me to come out boozing. I get all kinds of perks for going (lots of free anju and booze, comped booking clubs, even golf and other trips throughout the country, like skiing and hiking). Some other perks are that I have a great relationship with my school and they will cut me a lot of slack if I just feel like letting the co-teacher "take control" of the lesson due to a hangover or whatever. I also get out of a lot of the little camps and various "extra" lessons that pop up during the year. If you don't booze, you'll have to find another way to get similar perks.
My advice would be to tell people right off the bat you don't drink for health reasons. Say something like "my liver is shot and I can't process alcohol anymore- no booze, doctor's orders" etc, and never ever let a drop of booze hit your lips in front of others. Once people see it hit your lips, it's very easy to get swept down booze river, if you will, and good luck swimming out of the current. I definitely don't think Korea is any place for a recovering alcoholic, or anyone with that alcoholic 'gene' in their family. |
I was thinking that myself, the only problem is that would restrict me to some of the most low wage places in Asia, like Thailand, where apparently they don't drink as much. I'm more interested in the money in Korea and the culture of China. I've seen some people say that when Soju is poured for you, like as a toast or during dinner or something, you should just accept it and touch it to your lips but don't have to drink it. Would you agree to that, or to you hold to your never let it touch your lips theory? |
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toby99
Joined: 28 Aug 2009
Location: Dong-Incheon-by-the-sea, South Korea
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| Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2012 11:17 am Post subject: |
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| mcloo7 wrote: |
| I've seen some people say that when Soju is poured for you, like as a toast or during dinner or something, you should just accept it and touch it to your lips but don't have to drink it. Would you agree to that, or to you hold to your never let it touch your lips theory? |
I would just put Sprite ("kin-cida" is the Korean equivalent) or water in the glass. This is actually fairly common with women and some of the older adjosshis that don't drink or quit drinking due to alcohol abuse.
It's also worth noting that there are a fair number of Koreans (especially public school teachers) that don't drink for religious reasons. Some of them are serious but I think a good number just say that because they are recovering alcoholics and need some excuse to get out of drinking. I've had former principals rip into these teachers- cracking jokes to their face, calling them 'women' etc.- but as a foreigner I think you'd be ok using an excuse like that.
You might be asking "well, if it's such a hassle, why bother eating out with your school?" That's a reasonable question, but you'll find once you land that these group meetings are very important to Koreans, and you'll quickly get thrown in the doghouse if you skip any gatherings (I still get crap to this day about a school dinner I skipped over four years ago). That said, this is much more true for Koreans than foreigners. As a foreigner, you can probably get a pass. Even so, though, I still think avoiding the drink altogether is a tall order in this country. |
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Zulethe
Joined: 04 Jul 2008
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| Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2012 12:31 pm Post subject: |
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I'm sure this has been said before but it should be reiterated: If you are a serious alcoholic, even in recovery, I strongly advise against going to Korea.
The temptations are just too strong and ubiquitous for most alcoholics to resist.
You wouldn't suggest to an alcoholic to spend his/her free time in a bar would you?
By going to Korea you're essentially doing the same thing: you're going to a bar for a year...bad bad idea OP.
Especially when you couple the fact that Korea can be a quite depressing place is not good.
I would strongly advise going to another country such as Thailand where I believe sobriety would be much easier to maintain.
Z |
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mcloo7
Joined: 20 Aug 2012
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| Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2012 12:58 pm Post subject: |
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| Zulethe wrote: |
I'm sure this has been said before but it should be reiterated: If you are a serious alcoholic, even in recovery, I strongly advise against going to Korea.
The temptations are just too strong and ubiquitous for most alcoholics to resist.
You wouldn't suggest to an alcoholic to spend his/her free time in a bar would you?
By going to Korea you're essentially doing the same thing: you're going to a bar for a year...bad bad idea OP.
Especially when you couple the fact that Korea can be a quite depressing place is not good.
I would strongly advise going to another country such as Thailand where I believe sobriety would be much easier to maintain.
Z |
I understand why you're saying this. But I do sometimes go to bars, and just not drink. I first quit drinking when I was 19 and then a couple years later when I went back to school I even pledged a fraternity, which I'm sure many people would have advised against, but I just told them the deal, and that I wouldn't drink, and they understood. (The fraternity ended up getting temporarily disbanded before I was done pledging so I never actually became a frat boy) I came to the conclusion that you can't avoid being around alcohol if you still want to have a life, and i would hate this being the reason that I would choose not to go to a country. There is some truth to not putting yourself in a bad situation though. The thing is, the pressure to drink would not, most likely, come from myself, it would only be if a boss was forcing it on me or something, and couldn't take a "no thanks." |
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motiontodismiss
Joined: 18 Dec 2011
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| Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2012 2:29 pm Post subject: |
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| lemak wrote: |
Not sure if you're a guy, McLoo or not, but the guys there really pride themselves on their drinking prowess. One of the first questions in adult classes was often "How many bottles of soju can you drink?", and like how we were back home in university and crap they do tend to judge each other based on drinking "skills".
Korean men generally like alcohol, and it's a big part of their culture, but I never noticed anyone forcing it down people's (especially foreigners) throats. |
I'm Korean. My answer to the bolded question is always "zero". I never drink anything above 15% ABV. I've never had it forced down my throat, but I lived in the US for 10 years so I can get away with it even if I'm Korean.
When I go to dinner outings I always cut myself off when I'm still sober enough to drive and make sure that everyone knows. They'll just pour you some soda or water or something. My limit's something like 1-2 glasses of beer, 1-2 glasses of wine, or 1/2-1 glass of somaek (beer mixed with a bit of soju). |
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fermentation
Joined: 22 Jun 2009
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| Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2012 3:27 pm Post subject: |
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| lemak wrote: |
Not sure if you're a guy, McLoo or not, but the guys there really pride themselves on their drinking prowess. One of the first questions in adult classes was often "How many bottles of soju can you drink?", and like how we were back home in university and crap they do tend to judge each other based on drinking "skills".
Korean men generally like alcohol, and it's a big part of their culture, but I never noticed anyone forcing it down people's (especially foreigners) throats. |
I found it amusing that it was one of the first things they record in an official document when I first entered the Army along with my height, eyesight, weight, etc.
If you haven't seen anybody being forced to drink, you haven't been in Korean long enough or times are changing. I've gotten shit for not drinking quite a bit. Now I just tell them I abstain from alcohol completely from the get go then they don't bother me as much. |
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orosee
Joined: 07 Mar 2008
Location: Hannam-dong, Seoul
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| Posted: Mon Aug 27, 2012 3:39 pm Post subject: |
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You could say that you don't drink because of religious views. People accept the silliest things because of that reason (they also do the silliest things). If someone asks further questions, just find yourself some non-offensive religious group to name.
You could also claim to have a inherited genetic fault that affects your liver, and that alcohol causes a severe and potentially lethal adverse reaction. Should be accepted by most.
As mentioned before, if you'd been a normal social drinker (e.g. 1-2 liters of beer a month, a few martinis, no shots) chances are that your alcohol consumption goes up by up to tenfold (speaking for myself only though). There's plenty of people I know (including Koreans) who never drink, so there's no rule that someone must pick up drinking just because they're here.
Most of the people I know who don't drink alcohol just say "I don't drink alcohol" and that settles it. |
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