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Korean Job Discussion Forums "The Internet's Meeting Place for ESL/EFL Teachers from Around the World!"
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bmaw01
Joined: 13 May 2013
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Posted: Sun Sep 29, 2013 2:40 am Post subject: Did I do the right thing? |
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This event occurred a few days ago.
I just got done work. I walked about a block and when I rounded the corner I saw a few 40+ year old Korean men standing outside a restaurant. I'm about 2 minutes away from my apartment and it's about 7:00 at night. It's quite dark now. I hear screaming and I heard hitting and possibly punching. Right across the street and under a car garage a man was beating up a lady. He had her pinned in a corner and was just pounding the crap out of her. I looked around and nobody was doing anything. I'm like what the hell. Someone should do something. I was going to jump this idiot but decided against it. I rushed home and called a coworker. They took care of the situation because when I went back I saw a cop car. The cops were moving so slowly!
Should I have gotten involved? Maybe I could have tackled him and waited for the police? Has anyone been in a similar situation? I don't like to see women getting abused and beaten. |
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transmogrifier
Joined: 02 Jan 2012 Location: Seoul, South Korea
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Posted: Sun Sep 29, 2013 2:47 am Post subject: |
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I probably would have gone up and started filming him, shame him into realizing what a subhuman piece of crap he is. Anything to get him to stop without instigating any physical confrontation, because legally nothing good can come of that. Though once he hits me, then all bets are off.
But it's all just me sitting here, guessing. In the heat of the moment, I don't know what I would do, because I've never encountered that situation before. Here or anywhere. |
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Jake_Kim
Joined: 27 Aug 2005 Location: Seoul
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Posted: Sun Sep 29, 2013 3:53 am Post subject: |
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Physical intervention in this country almost always ends badly for the intervening 3rd party, no matter how benevolent your intent is. Not necessarily in the sense you'll sustain bodily harm in the process, but that you'd be in a legal trouble even if you came off without a scratch for being a grand master in martial arts or ex-special forces, etc.
Only law enforcement officers have legal rights to impose physical restraint on someone. Otherwise, the other party (even if he is indeed a hardcore bad-ass who gets convicted of the assault on the original victim) can easily press charges against the intervening 3rd party for battery and assault, as the original perpetration of violence and your intervention will be treated as two separate cases.
The only exception where 3rd party intervention is allowed would be something like a murder or suicide in progress beyond reasonable doubt. Other than those, the best course of action, if you can't just conscientiously walk away, is to report to the police and record the situation on video for evidence for prosecution. |
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Nolos
Joined: 23 Oct 2011
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Posted: Sun Sep 29, 2013 5:08 am Post subject: |
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OP is Captain save-a-ho. It doesn't work, and she will side with her abuser 9 times out of 10 before a stanky looking esl teacher. |
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Steelrails

Joined: 12 Mar 2009 Location: Earth, Solar System
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Posted: Sun Sep 29, 2013 6:38 am Post subject: |
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Gotta be careful, both parties might be living a life of crime. |
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itiswhatitis
Joined: 08 Aug 2011
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Posted: Sun Sep 29, 2013 7:26 am Post subject: |
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Don't feel bad.
After all-the police did arrive and stopped it, right?
A few months ago I saw 2 young Korean dudes get caught shoplifting.
There was 1 female store guard, 1 male and 1 female cop. One of the Korean dudes repeatedly slapped the female officer in the face. I wanted to intervene but after seeing so many of my friends here get burned I kept walking. |
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Threequalseven
Joined: 08 May 2012
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Posted: Sun Sep 29, 2013 8:48 am Post subject: |
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Video, video, video. If footage like that goes viral, then this country would practically need to address its acceptance of domestic abuse. |
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coralreefer_1
Joined: 19 Jan 2009
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Posted: Sun Sep 29, 2013 9:11 am Post subject: |
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Alot of bad advice here.
1. Intervene, and your rear end is on the line.
2. Video, and put that online, and you are very likely to get a lawsuit
Guys can talk all this macho bravado all they want, but this is a different culture that where we come from, and playing the "hero" has landed said hero in trouble FAR more often than it has helped said victim.
As someone else mentioned, that kind of abuse would more than likely go on long after said hero has been arrested, deported, blacklisted...etc. Unlike many other places, I dont think there are alot of women trying to "escape" abusive relationships here. Its not like you will act in their defense, and they will take the chance to flee. While you are sitting in the police station, they are more likely to be having make-up sex than they are to be having an official break-up.
It sucks I know, but you and any other foreigner here are best to just mind their own business. |
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geldedgoat
Joined: 05 Mar 2009
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Posted: Sun Sep 29, 2013 10:08 am Post subject: |
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I've intervened in one of these incidents once before. Right outside my apartment, I saw a 200+ pound well-built and very drunk ajosshi elbowing an elderly woman's head into the rear windshield of a car while simultaneously kicking her equally elderly husband's head into a low brick wall. I pushed through the ring of gawking spectators, jumped on his back, wrapped him in a half nelson, and leaned back with all my weight until he finally let off the old couple. When he caught his breath, turned to see who had interrupted his assault, and discovered it was a foreigner, the anger immediately melted from his face, and he - I sh*t you not - begin trying to practice his English with me. I just pointed at the bleeding couple on the ground and repeated, over and over, "Old people. No hit."
And that was that for about a month, until he followed me home one night and started drunkenly rambling about... something. He even had the gall to call the cops when I refused to let him in my apartment. When they, along with the cops that we called, eventually showed up, argued over which individual was actually in the wrong, and forced the drunk guy into our apartment, it turned out that all he had wanted was to explain that I had ripped his shirt during the fight and that that made him upset. He left shortly after that, and the cops followed after apologizing to us and giving me the most embarrassed and pained "please-understand-we're-not-all-like-that" look I think I'll ever see.
Not having been in the OP's situation I can't pass judgment on his decision not to intervene more directly, though I will say that I generally find it repugnant that so many are so willing to find any excuse to avoid helping those in immediate, possibly life-saving need. Then again, I'm kinduva stick in the mud when it comes to basic morality. |
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optik404

Joined: 24 Jun 2008
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Posted: Sun Sep 29, 2013 3:59 pm Post subject: |
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geldedgoat wrote: |
I've intervened in one of these incidents once before. Right outside my apartment, I saw a 200+ pound well-built and very drunk ajosshi elbowing an elderly woman's head into the rear windshield of a car while simultaneously kicking her equally elderly husband's head into a low brick wall. I pushed through the ring of gawking spectators, jumped on his back, wrapped him in a half nelson, and leaned back with all my weight until he finally let off the old couple. When he caught his breath, turned to see who had interrupted his assault, and discovered it was a foreigner, the anger immediately melted from his face, and he - I sh*t you not - begin trying to practice his English with me. I just pointed at the bleeding couple on the ground and repeated, over and over, "Old people. No hit."
And that was that for about a month, until he followed me home one night and started drunkenly rambling about... something. He even had the gall to call the cops when I refused to let him in my apartment. When they, along with the cops that we called, eventually showed up, argued over which individual was actually in the wrong, and forced the drunk guy into our apartment, it turned out that all he had wanted was to explain that I had ripped his shirt during the fight and that that made him upset. He left shortly after that, and the cops followed after apologizing to us and giving me the most embarrassed and pained "please-understand-we're-not-all-like-that" look I think I'll ever see.
Not having been in the OP's situation I can't pass judgment on his decision not to intervene more directly, though I will say that I generally find it repugnant that so many are so willing to find any excuse to avoid helping those in immediate, possibly life-saving need. Then again, I'm kinduva stick in the mud when it comes to basic morality. |
This whole story sounds made up. |
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Nolos
Joined: 23 Oct 2011
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Posted: Sun Sep 29, 2013 4:12 pm Post subject: |
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optik404 wrote: |
geldedgoat wrote: |
I've intervened in one of these incidents once before. Right outside my apartment, I saw a 200+ pound well-built and very drunk ajosshi elbowing an elderly woman's head into the rear windshield of a car while simultaneously kicking her equally elderly husband's head into a low brick wall. I pushed through the ring of gawking spectators, jumped on his back, wrapped him in a half nelson, and leaned back with all my weight until he finally let off the old couple. When he caught his breath, turned to see who had interrupted his assault, and discovered it was a foreigner, the anger immediately melted from his face, and he - I sh*t you not - begin trying to practice his English with me. I just pointed at the bleeding couple on the ground and repeated, over and over, "Old people. No hit."
And that was that for about a month, until he followed me home one night and started drunkenly rambling about... something. He even had the gall to call the cops when I refused to let him in my apartment. When they, along with the cops that we called, eventually showed up, argued over which individual was actually in the wrong, and forced the drunk guy into our apartment, it turned out that all he had wanted was to explain that I had ripped his shirt during the fight and that that made him upset. He left shortly after that, and the cops followed after apologizing to us and giving me the most embarrassed and pained "please-understand-we're-not-all-like-that" look I think I'll ever see.
Not having been in the OP's situation I can't pass judgment on his decision not to intervene more directly, though I will say that I generally find it repugnant that so many are so willing to find any excuse to avoid helping those in immediate, possibly life-saving need. Then again, I'm kinduva stick in the mud when it comes to basic morality. |
This whole story sounds made up. |
Either made up or sounds like a complete fool. "Old people. No hit." Sounds like a caveman. |
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geldedgoat
Joined: 05 Mar 2009
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Posted: Sun Sep 29, 2013 4:48 pm Post subject: |
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optik404 wrote: |
This whole story sounds made up. |
I won't argue with that. If I hadn't been there to experience it, I would likely be equally incredulous.
Nolos wrote: |
"Old people. No hit." Sounds like a caveman. |
More like talking to a dog who just messed on the carpet. |
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Steelrails

Joined: 12 Mar 2009 Location: Earth, Solar System
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Posted: Sun Sep 29, 2013 5:55 pm Post subject: |
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If it's between two civilians, then intervening is probably the moral thing to do in that case.
If it's between two people in the world of crime, hey that's a totally different rule book. For all we know, she was getting beat because she stole some meth from one of the other hookers and they fought about it and she scrached up the other girl's face. That's not something that warrants my concern. |
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maximmm
Joined: 01 Feb 2008
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Posted: Sun Sep 29, 2013 6:22 pm Post subject: |
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Steelrails wrote: |
If it's between two civilians, then intervening is probably the moral thing to do in that case.
If it's between two people in the world of crime, hey that's a totally different rule book. For all we know, she was getting beat because she stole some meth from one of the other hookers and they fought about it and she scrached up the other girl's face. That's not something that warrants my concern. |
Well said, dear comrade!
Prior to taking any sort of action in this situation, it is very important to first approach the gentleman dismantling the lady's face and politely inquire whether she did in fact steal his meth and/or scratched up another girl's face, because if she did, then she most certainly deserved this and much more, hence begging for a proper stoning. |
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augustine
Joined: 08 Sep 2012 Location: México
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Posted: Sun Sep 29, 2013 6:41 pm Post subject: |
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This is why I advocate carrying a mask on you at all times. I got mine. You can regulate the streets then flee the scene unknown. |
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