Korean Job Discussion Forums

[LPKSA]

Please no sarcasm, this is kind of serious.

I was an English teacher in KTown LA for a while, starting a job at a hagwon when I had just come back home from a year in China to start my MA.

I really liked my job working for a Korean hagwon in Los Angeles while working on my MA in TESOL. Some times things just happen like that for a reason, as in I found this job out of the blue within five days after returning from China. What better job could one ask for, when working on an MA in TESOL? I know it's not the best job, but without this job, I would have had a much harder time completing the MA in TESOL.

I became friends with a lot of my students while working. I made a lot of valuable friendships, both with Koreans and other nationalities.

One student in particular, I have to admit, I felt somewhat sorry for. He was living in LA, with his teenage son, and hoping to eventually pass a California state education test in hopes of becoming a teacher. Eventually his son finished high school and returned to Korea. The lease of the apartment which they were renting had finished and he was talking about trying to find an apartment which was inexpensive. In LA that can be hard to find.

I was living with my parents at the time, while completing the MA and working at the school. There were a few extra rooms in the house, and we have always had exchange students. I eventually asked my parents if it would be okay to rent a room out to this particular student, as he had just finished going to the hagwon and enrolled in a University in Los Angeles.

My parents, being all Catholic and all, agreed to let him live in the house, and without rent. They actually let him come live in their house, rent free.

So I asked him if he would be interested in living with us and he gladly came in. This is an ajossi, track record of being an educator in Korea for quite some time, and he really really wants to earn a green card, but cannot do so unless he has a job. He cannot get a job because he is on a student visa. We really wanted to help him any way that we could. It all seemed to work out.

I asked him how long he could see himself living in my parents house, and he said anywhere from 6 months to a year. My parents have been cool with that.

Eventually I finished my MA program and continued to work at the school in KTown while looking for a job, which I have eventually found in the Middle East, and I could not be happier.

My thing is this. It's not really a problem, but more of a minor concern. I think my parents are being manipulated. I mean, you would automatically assume that if someone invited you to live with their family, and you don't know their family very well, and this person eventually left, then it would be time for you to leave as well. I was under the assumption that he would leave my parents house when I left, but instead he said "I'm going to stay here with your family."

Something doesn't seem right. He's not poor. I have found out that he actually has a lot of money, but he is playing this "I'm so humble" card with them all along. He will not pay rent, and I am stuck now sending a large portion of my salary from here, over to my parents to help them in tough financial times. I have been trying to contact him, to tell him that he really should start contributing around their house, or that he should find a new place to live. I don't think it's fair for him to live for free, while others have to work to support them. It doesn't make sense. My parents are getting slightly older now, and they don't want to be harsh and tell him up front to contribute, because they already told him many times they don't want him to pay to live there, which I find ridiculous.

After all, it is their house, but come on. If any of you were in this situation (not everyone would bring a student into their home, but some of you might, out of the kindness of your heart), wouldn't you eventually feel uncomfortable with this student that you brought in, after you leave your parents house, with him making himself comfortable in your parents house, essentially being a freeloader?

Additionally, I am certain that he is cheating on his wife, who is in Korea, whom he claims to love dearly. I know he has been meeting up with ladies on the side in hotels around LA. I really worry that he might be bringing a lady around the house when my parents aren't home. Though I cannot prove this, I have a feeling this is the case. My parents think I am crazy because "he's Catholic and he goes to church every Sunday!" Come on. Seriously. Come on.

How does one approach this kind of situation pragmatically from the other side of the world?

Laugh if you want. This is a situation that I created, that I want to end. He will not answer my phone calls. He will not reply to any of my emails. He is living rent free in my parents house, and they don't seem to really care, yet they are like "send us money, now, because you are our son." I'm really starting to lose sleep over this at this point in time.

[Stain]

Kick him out. You know all these things. If he won't leave then call the authorities. And whatever you do, don't feel the slightest bit guilty about it. He also doesn't feel the slightest bit guilty and I say that assuming you're not full of shit.

[Old Painless]

I hope your parents aren't naïve, they should know how to deal with this situation. If they are naïve, then call them on the telephone and tell them to call the sheriffs office. Then inform him via registered mail that he has xx number of days to pack his bags and be out or the sheriff will come and escort him to immigration jail.


Or they could just pack up his things when he leaves the house, put them outside in the driveway, then change the locks. It's not rocket science.



***It is 4/1 so don't expect too much out of this crowd.

[DosEquisXX]

It's not your house. You can tell them all you want, but ultimately it's their call.

I'd kick him out though. Your parents are way too nice imo

[optik404]

Are you in the Middle East now? Did you tell him to move out before you left? Your parents probably want him out but they want to avoid confrontation. I'd surprise him on your next vacation by showing up in LA and kicking him out. No notice, just show up.

[LPKSA]

He knows when I am returning. I told him that I would be back on the 11th of July.

Seems that the 11th of July is when his semester starts back up again, therefore he won't be around, except to come home and sleep. Perhaps I should just be sleeping in "my" bed (which essentially has become his), of I could let my pitbull take it. Might have to.