Korean Job Discussion Forums

[Weigookin74]

Just thought I'd provoke a discussion. Already started one on weigook; might as well do the same over ehre.

You'd think with time here, you'd get more use to it. But as the years go by, more and more, things grind on me and p !$$ me off. While many here are nice, many others are selfish idiots with no ettiquite and when you try to tell folks to quit being idiots almost gets you into fist fights with the locals. (No, I don't actually use the phrase idiot. But, feel like I have to become rude and aggressive sometimes due to the lack of common sense and common courtesy.)

Just examples, you go to the gym and a guy hogs one set of weights doing every exercise imaginable and when he rests in between sets, you try to take it for a set and explain what "share" means and the K guy becomes an arrogant d bag because he never learned ettiquite.

You drive and the guy in front you just slams on his brakes quickly and turns with no signal light forcing you to break hard to avoid hitting him. Then when you toot your horn at him, he gets out and wants to fight you with his friend 2 on 1 because he doesn't like having his lack of consideration for other people called out.

Guess it's been a few years since an ajossi has walked up to a K chick I'm with and start questioning her for being with me and calling her a hooker, a *beep*, a race traitor, etc. So, I can be greatful for that at least.

Anyhew, you get the examples. Sometimes, I feel like I can stand it. But, then, even after many years of being here, things really grind on me. I've mostly backed off while still speaking my piece and not changing my opinion due to knowing the cops always favor a Korean over the foriegner in a fight.

But honestly, I think if I could just live here, work, and mostly be alone away from the general population most of the time, I could stand staying. Add in gross humid heat for much of the year, white skies, smog, and other such things. Weather here sucks too.

On the other hand, my students are great and I like the kids most of the time. They are always so happy to see me. Most of my Korean co workers are pleasant folks. The weather is nice in May and October and the odd short spell in between. I do like the scenery of themountains when it's actually a clear day and enjoy biking through the countryside. The after service of products here are good. The girls are pretty (though they can be in Canada too especially in larger cities which I don't come from). Just got to make sure they understand western culture, if not, it could be a marriage from hell if you get hitched.

So, there are many positives here and some nice people. But, the lack of respect, selfishness, and lack of manners or consideration of other people really grinds on me. Some K dudes can be really arrogant, self centered, lacking in social manners, gesturing like macho gorillas that do need to be knocked around if it weren't for the Korean legal system protecting them. As much as I know I'm not going to fight 50 million people, I still get really ticked off at idiocy and the lack of common sense. Is it time to get out?

Problem is I can't afford to leave yet. I was in debt to my eyeballs when I got over here. Good news is in a couple of more years, I'll be able to leave if I want. Maybe punch a couple of arrogant d bag K dudes out on the way out the door. Criminal record won't mean much to me then. A lot of dudes are nice enough, just some are d ! (k $.

Sorry for my rant. I almost got into a fistfight with two of them this morning on the way driving to work. Of course if I had of gotten into it with them, we all know the cops would have sided with the Koreans. Sometimes, it really takes all of my strength not to lose it. Once I can get to a certain savings point and can afford to have to leave and having a criminal record won't matter, I'm worried about really losing my cool with some idiots. (But no worries, I'm not dumb or crazy enough to do something severe unless I were really cornered with no way out.)

So, long term vets, what are your stories and how do you deal with it when things here really grind on you? Any advice to give? (Asides from improving my fighting skills. Ha ha.)

[cabeza]

I find that when I don't drive, my stress levels decrease by about 90%.

Last summer I cussed out a woman after she cut us off. She came back at me in English! But I felt so idiotic and ashamed afterwards. Since then I really try not to drive as much especially at certain times of the day.
Though my wife is pregnant so I'm having to drive a whole lot more now.

It's just not worth the hassle. I honestly have the real urge to crack skulls with some of the ridiculous shit that happens on the roads.

[Died By Bear]

SO this rant/thread is really about your ROAD RAGE driving tactics?

[Fox]

[Weigookin74]

Ok, I can agree the driving is prob a good chunck of the problems nowadays. It drives me insane and has brought me almost to fisticuffs. There are occasionally other issues like I mentioned. I guess in the other situations, I try to avoid them. IE The gym issue, by going to an expesive gym that uses both air con and has two sets of weights to avoid irritation.

So, the advice about driving a longer route if the drive is less hectic. I do try that to a point. But will keep trying. Yes, the road design here is idiotic too. I'm at a red light and the next one up ahead turns green. Then, the one I'm at turns green and the one up ahead turns red unless you speed like crazy to get through it. Add in a dip stick driving 20 km/h in front of you when the speed limit is 60 km/h. Add in folks who park illegally to the bad driving.

Got no choice about driving as my school is across town and the bus route sucks so bad it would be 4 to 5 times the time to get to work.

But, other things do start to get on my nerves and have always needed time alone to get away from Korea in my mind. Prob not a good sign?

[Weigookin74]

[Lucas]

[wanderkind]

[Who's Your Daddy?]

I'd say forget the money and go home, it sounds like you are hurting your mental health. Everyone has debt back home, and you'll probably enjoy your life more. (I'm going home in a few months, so maybe I'm projecting though.)

The isolation here kills me; the lack of proper conversations. It makes one strange. And I think those that have totally adjusted to living here have probably just become very strange.

[Steelrails]

As far as road rage, I agree it can get bad here. Ever since I moved out of the small town and into the big city, I've flipped someone off and screamed at someone, something I never did back home or in small town Korea.

Normally I'm a real chill driver. The kind people honk at for going to slow. Ol granny Steelrails. But I'd rather cruise and take things slow and smooth. Let people go ahead, let that person merge. Just put on some chill tunes and take things slow. I find either classical, dixieland jazz, Motown, or some Teddy Pendergrass-Al Green type R&B make things chill. Maybe neo-Soul like Jill Scott or Erykah Badu. If I get stressed, just put on some Hank Williams and imagine I'm climbing the bell tower. Mellow music to fantasies of violence is a good way to stay calm.

Me personally, the stress level I had with Koreans (and this happened back home) went down drastically after I spent a couple years away from them, and had some failings where they still stood by me. Also, listening to their problems of living in the States and then coming here made me more sympathetic towards their condition and why they do what they do. Last, just plain aging makes you realize that utopia is impossible and getting upset at the world and people because they aren't perfect is the fault of you having unreasonable expectations.

That and booze. Good booze. And affordable smokes.

And I'm going to get some hate on this- but if you really want to chill. Find a not so busy/country road, go for a drive, and crack a beer (not getting drunk, just having A beer or 2). You don't have to worry about cops everywhere like back home. You can enjoy the fact that you can drive slightly erratically on a back road, smoke and sip, and if you do the slightest thing wrong, some cop isn't going to come flying out of nowhere to write you up for everything. Next, maybe put up a Christmas tree or something and enjoy the fact that you won't get sued and issued a cease and desist order. Enjoy the fact that people aren't screaming over the stupid social issues we do back home. Enjoy the freedoms you do have here that you don't have back home.

[Weigookin74]

[nicwr2002]

Like the above poster said, I just start driving like they do and it does feel good. I think the reason no one here uses blinkers though is if you do, everyone and their momma will cut you off. I stopped using them myself for this very reason.

[World Traveler]

[Weigookin74]

[Fox]

I don't agree with Steelrails about the whole drinking and driving thing (especially when it's so easy to just take a taxi or bus to one of the country's countless mountain hiking paths, walk a ways up, and then sit down and have a drink in a natural setting), but I do agree the generally hands off approach the police take here is refreshing.