Korean Job Discussion Forums

[DanSensei]

Hello good folks at Dave's ESL. I'm currently in an interesting predicament and testing the waters in these forums for some advice, just in case the same has happened to any of you. At the apartment I'm staying in, its lease is up at the end of October. Two of my roommates, a married couple, will be moving out that month into a new house. I'll be teaching in Korea starting at the beginning of next month and my girlfriend, who has lived with me for the past year, wants to move into another apartment while I'm gone. The thing is, the leasing agents usually require the leaser to provide verifiable income at the time of the application process. I don't have the usual two most current paystubs since I graduated college recently and haven't been employed during my time in college and now. Plus, my girl's income isn't nearly enough to meet or exceed the 2.5 x monthly rent requirements but it would naturally be taken care of once I begin teaching. Even though I haven't signed a contract yet with my future company (my background check and its apostilling is still pending), do you think having the signed contract would be enough proof to allow her to get the apartment?

[Steelrails]

Me personally, if I was a landlord, I wouldn't put any value in some random piece of paper which has zero legal standing outside of Korea, but hey you never know.

Since you didn't work during college, I assume your parents supported you? (and that is nothing you should feel ashamed of- if people offer you free money, take it.) If they supported you in college, they might be willing to support you in getting your feet off the ground.

Last bit of advice- have your GF get a job here too or tell her to get her own place. You paying her rent while she gets a free apartment all alone in another country just screams cuck. Don't take this the wrong way, but you're going into adulthood which means its time to take a realistic view of things. People get bored and lonely when they're alone. If your relationship is healthy enough that you can trust her, then you can tell her to get her own place and it won't end you all. If your relationship isn't that healthy then you either need to stay (if she means that much) or bring her along, or end it. Your name is going to be on that lease and you don't want to be paying her rent and left holding the bag when you break up in 8 months because she's banging someone else. I'm guessing you think your love is invincible and all that stuff, but you're an independent adult now. That kind of fantasy stuff needs to be balanced against things like legally binding lease agreements, your credit score, and liability for damage if she decides to flip out and trash the place. And don't say "that will never happen" or "she'll never do that" or "our love is too strong". Every person who has had that stuff happen to them said the exact same thing. What makes you so special? How many people said "My girlfriend will probably psychotically break up with me in 8 months and destroy the apartment I signed for and make me liable for $10,000 in damages, but that's okay", but that's happened time and time again because everyone believed that they were exceptional and immune to such things. Don't make the same mistake. Think like an adult.

Sorry for the "tough love", but it wouldn't be real advice if it wasn't said. Anyways best of luck.

[northway]

Don't pay your significant other's rent unless you're engaged, at the very least. Doubly so if you're living in different places.

[cmxc]

In my nearly 12 years in South Korea, I have seen so many cases of international expats coming to Korea for work with a significant other back home.

After arriving and spending a few weeks (in some cases just a few hours) in country, especially when it comes to males, they almost inevitably end up deciding that they want to test the waters and expand their dating options.

You are a fresh college graduate, and when you arrive in Seoul, it is highly likely you will find yourself attracted to one or more Korean females. You are probably much more likely to stray before your significant other.

You may enjoy the idea that you have fun here and have someone waiting for you back home, but I recommend that you minimize your risks of being financially liable for a situation that you simply cannot fully predict.

Your post suggests that you will be sharing rent with your girlfriend, which seems not entirely unreasonable. In any case, I would be very careful about putting my name on a lease that I know I'm highly likely to end up regretting.

Imagine the situation where you arrive in Korea, fully intending to honor your relationship, but you accidentally find yourself in love with a Korean stunningly attractive to you. You then have to break it off with your s/o back home, and there is a reason for the saying "hell hath no wrath like a woman scorned..."

I have seen numerous otherwise very dedicated men change their tune once they started living in Korea.

[radcon]

I'm not sure if I understood your OP correctly. You are a young college grad, coming to Korea to teach, girlfriend staying in the US, and you will be sending her money to cover her rent and living expenses? You will be a hogwon teacher with a kept woman? (at least partially kept anyway) DO NOT DO THIS, SON.

[mr_thehorse]

[greatunknown]

Are you out of your mind? Moving to Korea to work in a Hagwon while contractually commiting to support a girlfriend back home is a really bad idea. Dont do it

[Old Painless]

[FriendlyDaegu]

Still waiting for the interesting bit. Seriously, having significant ties to home is what makes people freak out when things go south. If you can't bring her with you you're in for a rough time.

[DanSensei]

I feel like some clarification is in order. I'm not the young, bright-eyed, bushy-tailed, naive college graduate that you're making me out to be. I have been an independent adult for the past 12 years so please spare me the patronizing. With that being said, my folks didn't pay for me to go to college; my GI Bill did all that for me (military veteran here). Also, nobody but Steelrails managed to even answer the actual question.

The condition of my relationship shouldn't come into question, as I know it a lot better than anyone here thinks. For as long as we have been together, only a year of our time was spent within the same area code and neither party cheated while we were a few states apart. We are both as committed and loyal to this relationship as any newlywed couple, and this teaching opportunity will be the ultimate endeavor to strengthen it. Sure I know that there are risks involved by doing this, but I'm willing to take it if it avoids the other dire alternatives.

[FriendlyDaegu]

Why can't she get a job or live in an affordable place? I don't understand the dilemma. She gets roommates she can afford, and you come here and save all your money. Easy. You're 30 years old, sounds like, how long do you want to be scraping by?

[DanSensei]

She just has a part-time job for now, something she likes but doesn't pay all that well. There's no way that she could pay for an apartment nearby on her own with that job so in the meantime, she's taking measures to find something full-time job within the art field.

[jcd]

Interesting situation is a stranger breaks into my room in the middle of the night and watches me and my girlfriend sleep.
This is more like I need some advice.

[optik404]

Yeah I don't think any management company will take a contract. It shouldn't be hard to find a place that just runs an credit check.

[wooden nickels]