Korean Job Discussion Forums

[wonkavite62]

This might be a future trend in how recruiters interview people for jobs in South Korea:

RECRUITER: Hi, Michael, how are you?
TEACHER:    I'm fine, thank you, and you?
RECRUITER: We would like to ask you some questions about how you will adjust to Korea. This interview is for a job at FUN English Village, a government hagwon in Gyeonggi Do.
TEACHER: Yes, I know, I've done my research and that's why I am applying for this job.
RECRUITER: Interesting. The school would like to know if you've been to Korea before.
TEACHER: I've been here for seven years. So I know Korea quite well.
RECRUITER: And do you have references?
TEACHER(wondering if the recruiter has even read his resume ):    I've got written references that cover all of that time, all seven years.
RECRUITER: I see. Michael, can you eat spicy food? Meals are provided but Korean food only.  Are you allergic to kimchi?
TEACHER: I wouldn't say that I'm allergic to it. I can eat kimchi all right. I make my own kimchi at home.
RECRUITER: Are you, or have you ever been, a functioning alcoholic?
TEACHER(lying through his teeth): I only ever drink small quantities of weak beer. So no, I'm not an alcoholic.
RECRUITER: This is a Christian school. We are highly religious, and we like to recruit only Christian teachers. Michael, are you a Christian?
TEACHER: Yes, I am, actually. I have been baptised and confirmed, in fact I have my baptismal and confirmation certificates to prove it. You can check. I have already e-mailed them to you.
RECRUITER: Michael you're single, right? Why aren't you married at your age? It's important-the school director wants to know why.
TEACHER: I'm not single, I'm ANNULLED. I went to the Vatican and got my marriage annulled, because my wife was an Iraqi terrorist in disguise. Pope Francis did it for me. I had the marriage cancelled so to speak.
RECRUITER( trying not to sound too disappointed): Oh, I see. And this is very important-do you have your apostilled criminal record check? No apostille, no job in Korea.
TEACHER: Yes apostille, yes job! I have that document, and it's still good.
RECRUITER: And do you have an apostilled notarized (spelt with a zee), diploma?
TEACHER:   Of course.
RECRUITER(now somewhat desperate): And do you have an apostilled copy of your birth certificate? Most schools don't require it. But this school does.
TEACHER: Yes, I do. In fact I went further. I'm so organized (spelt with a zee), that I went and apostilled my baptismal certificate too! I did that when I was at the Vatican. And I got an apostille for my confirmation certificate, and for all my written reference letters. Heck, I even apostilled the 2-minute video presentation that Gyeonggi Do now insists that we do. How's that for professionalism?
RECRUITER(clutching at straws now): Michael, where were you born?
TEACHER: I was born in the British Isles. I have all the paperwork and a British passport...
RECRUITER: Yeah, yeah, yeah!  have heard that one before. You're from Scotland, right? Now that Scotland is independent, you have to use a Scottish passport. So you can't work in Korea! GOTCHA! GOTCHA! So there! Another one bites the dust! At last.
RECRUITER(turning to her long-suffering assistant after rudely hanging up): Another failure! We've been going on like this for months and we can string it out some more, because this school pays us to look for people even when we don't find them. It's just too bad there are so many bad teachers out there. We need to tighten up immigration rules some more (sounding melodramatic).

IF Scotland won its independence, could this be yet another reason for hagwons to turn teachers down? I would appreciate your reactions to this, even if the result is that Scotland has voted AGAINST independence this time.
I realise one reason I despite lots of experience, found it hard to break into Seoul is most hagwons' insistance on North American teachers only. But it's more than that. There is a certain arrogance with some schools and recruiters.