Korean Job Discussion Forums

crazylemongirl · Joined: 23 Mar 2003 Location: almost there...

Guys with korean girlfriends

I'm glad you bought this up actually... I don't think that women over here are immune from rude behaviour just by virtue of missing a y chromosome, far from it.

Quoting one of my friends who in a moment of rare drunken lucity said this

I don't care if you pink, brown, blue or white. If your an as***** your and as*****.

So following that analogy through to this situation I don't judge people on what colour their girlfriend is, for me the personality of person of person goes a long way. I think anyone who says stuff like that about people without even knowing you is not nice person. Someone who's not worth knowing.

Likewise if someone doesn't want to give me the time of day because I'm a western women therefore just a desperate and lonely reject. like the intial poster did then I'm not going to be crying into my coffee that him and I never become friends.
I suppose it's a good old rule again don't judge a book by it's cover
CLG

CLG

Tiger Beer · Joined: 07 Feb 2003

Regarding foreigners.. ahmm.. I'm different at different times.. depends on what I'm doing..

Just recently though I saw a few foreigners coming out of the subway exit.. and I quickly changed directions so I wouldn't have that awkward moment..

Generally though I acknowldge them.. but thats about it.. on occassion I've went up to talk to them if its nighttime and they are in an area where there aren't many foreigners around..

For the most part.. I have no problem with talking to other foreigners.. sometimes its good.. sometimes its not.. just depends..

The only annoying times are when its a very new person and they are doing all kinds of adjustment problems and telling you all about it in detail.. but thats not that common..

chi-chi · Joined: 15 Jan 2003

mods you may delete

Cedar · Posted: Sun May 11, 2003 7:06 am Post subject:

Okay, I am normally quite friendly to other foreigners (except when they are in groups, which intimidates me a bit) but let me tell you... today i met this German guy, and he REALLY rubbed me the wrong way.

Why?

Because he was assuming his reality was my reality. That is the problem when meeting other foreigners. (I am also sometimes guilty of this). We assume somehow a level or degree of understanding exists. And sometimes it doesn't. The fact of the matter is that this guy really pissed me off with his assumption that I was somehow 'just like him'.

Often foreigners start griping. And they assume I can understand, or that I'll even agree. But the reality is I don't even like listening to my own gripes, most of the time! So why would I want to listen to someone else's? I don't know, cause I can be guilty of this same thing. I am guilty of assuming you all like Korean food, or that you'd be interested in learning more about Korea. I guess not everyone feels like me.

It's just, I don't know... we are all strangers, the first time we meet. Even if we have the same eye color and are wearing the same pair of sandals or something, we are different from each other and distinct. We have a different take on what is right in front of our eyes. My best friend goes nuts on the spitting thing, and I spit on the street! She and I think very similiarly but are still so different.

I guess we all just need to remember to think of each other as different... not to assume we share a reality along with a language.

The Man known as The Man · Posted: Sun May 11, 2003 11:42 am Post subject:

Squaffy · Joined: 25 Feb 2003 Location: All over the place

I do the eyebrow thing too.

How many of you can raise a single eyebrow as an inquisative look? No response, just keep on walking.

Interesting - maybe I should make a poll about the ability to raise just one eyebrow - I know for sure that not many people can do it.

Manner of Speaking · Joined: 09 Jan 2003

I'll have to watch for the eyebrow thing, I've never seen that. Smile

Bear in mind when I started this thread, I wasn't suggesting you HAVE to greet a foreigner/stranger on the street -- just that some of the reactions I've seen over the years have been...interesting to the point of amusement. Rolling Eyes

Nods to what Cedar said. That's true, you summed it up well: assuming sometimes that you and the other person have some kind of 'shared experience or understanding', when that's not always true. There are times when I find The Ambush annoying. I know for newbies, adjusting to life in Korea can be difficult, but if you're going to be here for any length of time you should have your s**t halfway decently together -- and dealing with some of the "problems" of living in Korea is half the adventure or reason for being here.

The assumption that a western guy is with a korean woman only because he "can't get a girl back home" is obviously sexist. Possibly racist as well, as it suggests that korean women are "not equal" to western women. If you're walking down the street back home and see a white woman with a black guy, do we assume it's because she's somehow unable to get a white guy?

That being said, running away in panic is a bit of an overreaction as well!

Sliver · Joined: 04 May 2003 Location: The third dimension

Most of the people you hang out with are Korean, by the numbers. This makes sense. So what do the Koreans you hang out with say to you when you suggest that POT should be legalised.

Do you have a good, indepth discussion about it?

If so what is the opinion of the Koreans you hang out with?

This seems to be a subject you feel strongy enough about to display it us (ESL cafe users) so I am genuinely interested in your reply.

Perhaps foreigners in Korea can't provide you with what you most desire???

Please don't mention anything that could be construed as too controversal (such as where, how or how much) for the moderators, I am simply curious and await some enlightenment.

denz · Posted: Mon May 12, 2003 2:20 am Post subject: yesh well

the only thing that irks me when i see other foreigners is that we can't use our code language to talk about people anymore. we have to make do with hand signals and exagerrated facial tics.

my advice for those that fear the wrath of the judgmental foreign woman -forget about them. cause we don't love them hoes.

denz

William Beckerson · Guest

Manner of Speaking · Joined: 09 Jan 2003

The Man known as The Man · Posted: Mon May 12, 2003 4:56 am Post subject:

helly · Joined: 01 Apr 2003 Location: WORLDWIDE

When I first got here 7 years ago and saw someone on a street, I'd usually smile and nod the head in greeting. If my counterpart wanted to strike up a conversation, I'd be more than happy to participate but I didn't initiate anything other than pleasant courtesies.

Now, I see so many other foreigners here on a daily basis (I work in a business district) that I honestly don't pay much attention. Seeing another white face is the same as seeing another Korean. If, however, I keep bumping into the same person, I might strike up a conversation while waiting for the crosswalk. Same as I would back in the states.