Korean Job Discussion Forums

[jajdude]

This is a very good thread.

For me, culture shock is now permament. It has been so for years. I don't expect it ever to diminish much. Some days, no problem. Other days, holy crap! And it seems like it doesn't matter wher I am, could be any country. I imagine that if I were back in my hometown I'd still it feel it for at least a few years.

I came to Korea in 1997. I have lived in Taiwan, Thailand and Vietnam also. I guess I am not as adaptive as I might have previously believed, because often things get to me beyond my slippery grasp of sanity.

Anyway it does have an upside. It is nice to truly know from experience how various the world is.


Hey, we are westerners in Asia! Of course it is strange to us. I imagine the other continents would be equally mind-blowing a lot of the time. Wouldn't it be amazing to actually know such experiences?

[Ya-ta Boy]

kangnamdragon and whatthefunk:

I wish one or both of you would write more.

I can only remember talking to one person who said he'd never experienced it, and he was right smack in the middle of an episode during our conversation. In the 20 minutes or so I was caught in a conversation with him, he complained about everything Korean. He was intensely hostile and totally unaware of it as far as I could see.

I'd like to hear your thoughts on why you don't experience it the same way I do.

I'm asking because I've been asked to do some tutoring with a Ukrainian kid who is a behavior problem at school. I'm theorizing that some of his problem is culture shock.

So I'm curious about any coping strategies that have worked for other people. The only one I know is learning more about the culture. I found the more I knew, the less problem it was for me to adapt. If there are any other good strategies out there, I'd love to hear them to pass along.

[peppermint]

I won't say I've never had any culture shock, but I definitely didn't follow the normal pattern of a honeymoon, then a crash, then learning about the culture and finding a sort of acceptance.

Shortly after arriving I had a series of fairly major crises that hit in the span of a week, and I guess I was too busy dealing with the fall out from them to think about where I was, until I got into the learning phase.

I'd suspect the blowout you mention are partly because of culture shock, partly because of the lack of any real support system here, and because people feel like they aren't accountable for their actions as much here. ( I personally feel more accountable here, because I can't depend on any annonymity to cover bad behaviour)

[kangnamdragon]

I think getting over culture shock takes time. For me, it has been years living in Korea and spending most of my time with Koreans. Of course, I complain sometimes about inefficency in some situations in Korea, but I don't think of that as culture shock. I am used to the culture.

First, an attempt to learn the language helps.

Second, having a close friend who is in the culture. If you work with other foreigners, try to spend some weekends with only Koreans.

Third, time.

Fourth, accept what cannot be changed and learn to deal with the rest. It is ok to get upset sometimes about some things. That is natural.

Fifth, ask. If I don't understand something, I try to find out why something is a certain way.

Sixth, realize that different people adapt in different ways to living here.

Seventh, find out what you like about the culture and adopt it into your life. I personally like Korean pop songs, dramas, hyeong/oppa stuff, etc.

Eighth, remember you will never be 100% a part of a culture you were not born in, yet accept you are who you are in this situation.

[whatthefunk]

I think its a personality thing...Im just naturally adaptable. Ive never really had a hard time getting used to anything. Just accept things the way they are and move on.
Kids have it the worst I think. In any new situation, kids are likely to be nervous and feel isolated. Think about your first day at school when you were a kid. Shocking. My first day of kindergarten, we were sitting in a circle on the floor and each person had to tell their name and when it came to me I barfed in the middle of the circle. Nice one whatthefunk. But I got used to it cause I made new friends after all the kids forgot about the barf incident. But now imagine if you were a kid you went to the first day of kindergarten and all the kids were speaking Portugese. You wouldnt be able to make friends at all and I imagine that you would become isolated very quickly. Isolation brings on behavioral problems. I knew a guy here in Japan who was from Bangledesh and he had a kid, about 7 years old. Worst behaved kid Ive ever encountered. He spoke pretty good Japanese but very little of his native language. His mother spoke some Japanese but his father didnt speak any at all. So he had almost no discipline at home and I think he got teased a lot at school for being a foreigner. An almost impossible situation. I hope you have better luck with the kid your going to teach..

[Cedar]

When I first came here everything made me tired. There weren't any stores like Carrefour or EMart, it was just your corner soopuh, or the bigger soopuh down the street. Only the department stores had imported goods, and it was never what you really needed. I had to have my mom send me all kinds of stuff I'd taken for granted. Like basil.

At the same time I LOVED everything about being in Korea and shunned other foreigners for the most part and tried so hard to learn the language and understand the culture. Heck, there weren't many options, I wasn't in Seoul and there weren't many foreigners around.

Now, almost ten years later, having lived only in Korea and China in that time, well, I don't know if I still have any sort of culture shock or not.

I am not someone who moans about people pushing me or hawking and spitting (I both push and hawk and spit). I love Korean food, and I speak good Korean. I have many interests and hobbies and things I do and friends and etc. etc.

I'm happy, here. Well, aside from the fact that my husband isn't here with me now... but that's temporary.

But I do get flashes of needing to escape Korea, I have had bad experiences (a two year long stalker being the worst, much worse than my first job screwing me over, or the financial crash in 1997 making my salary practically dissapear), there are days when I grumble to myself. But I don't know if that is culture shock. I don't think so, because I think if I was in America I'd have days when I wanted to leave it, when the close-minded saccharine-patriotic consumeristic BS of it would wash over me and have me swearing under my breath about "stupid f-cking Americans!".

Anyway, leave if you want, but let me tell you, I don't drink, smoke, go to clubs... I eat Korean food, speak Korean, have Koreans friends and feel that I am about as happy as I could be anywhere. Maybe that's just me.

Last gasp on the subject-- comparing Korea to America or wherever you are from might not be the right thing to do. You had 20+ years to adapt to how home does things. However, if you tried living in China (like I have) or some other non-Western country, then maybe you'd be able to be more realistic about Korea. Korea may not have everything down, but it's got advantages over many other countries and that's no joke.

[bosintang]

I'm been around for about a year and a half, and I reckonize that I've been going through a bit of culture-shock for about the past 2-3weeks. Here's a few examples why:

- I had a schedule change at work, and I've been extremely annoyed about how some things are being done. Normally, I would shrug and say well, it's Korea, but right now it bothers me.

- I bumped into an ajumma the other day by accident and even though I apologized, she scowled at me. Normally that would mean nothing to me, but it bothered me that day.

- I've been negative and cyncial about everyone and everything around me. One example, on the subway a seat was free next to me, and two princesses came in front of me and where whining away about who was going to sit in it. Normally I wouldn't care, but this time I was thinking I wish these whiny twats would shut up and just go away. (But it didn't help that they were blocking my view of a perfect ass on another chick.)

[dogbert]

[jajdude]

[bosintang]

[meagicano]

I left home about a month ago - flew out of Canada on February 13th, but I haven't really experienced culture shock yet.

I had a rough first day (shitty directions, it was raining, I had no idea where the hell I was and then got to my dorm to find out it had no elevator and I was on the fourth floor), but everything from there has gone easy.

Of course, I'm an exchange student. I have a support system built in - there are other Westerners here, and a lot of people who speak English. I don't, of course, rely on them - I head out on my own into Sinchon and to check things out a bit. I've always been very adaptable - moved around a lot as a kid (military family), to different areas of the country, and moving to BC from the east is like going to a different country! I have had some things sort of faze me a bit - the cleaning ladies (two of them, on the same day) who came up and stroked my hair; the intense staring while in a restaurant; the jerkish high school boys on the subway who tried to practice their English and then would conveniently lose their balance, things like that.

[Leslie Cheswyck]

[yomuthabyotch]

[Rock]

[Grotto]

In my experience I have found the vast majority of 'church' people to be close minded, intolerant, ignorant, two faced phonies that need a good hard slap upside the head.

So yeah I guess at a church is where you will find like minded people.