Korean Job Discussion Forums

lastat06513 · Posted: Tue May 03, 2005 12:53 am Post subject:

jazblanc

Absolutely true!
And....I couldn't agree with you more

Sex is tied hand-in-hand with the way people view relationships these days.
But I feel the major problem lies with the fact that it is done as an "exchange of favors" concept in Korea. Alot of girls here feel that they should share their bodies for the unique opportunity to learn English. Sex is seen here as a "means to an end" in which one person gets something out of it so the other must give in return.
And what bothers me more, once the other person (usually the foreigner) has served their purpose. they are discarded and then that is when the woman starts looking for a real love, most of the time it turns out to be a Korean.
I am not making a racist remark, though it might sound so, I am just peeved that a person would stay in a relationship for one or 2 years for the simple fact they are learning something for free.

kermo · Posted: Tue May 03, 2005 1:00 am Post subject:

peppermint · Posted: Tue May 03, 2005 1:14 am Post subject:

I understand what you're saying. I know quite a few men who've slept around and still have the emotional maturity of a five year old.

In my experience, the men that I've met who have waited/ are waiting have very idealized notions about romance and more importantly about the women in their lives.. Maybe that's not as connected to the lack of sex as it seems though.

agraham · Joined: 19 Aug 2004 Location: Daegu, Korea

agraham · Joined: 19 Aug 2004 Location: Daegu, Korea

guangho · Posted: Tue May 03, 2005 1:35 am Post subject:

Most women in China- and from what I see, here- want a) a white face for the prestige factor and b) english lessons. Keep expectations low and you'll be fine.

pollyplummer · Joined: 07 Mar 2005 Location: McMinnvillve, Oregon

Very interesting thread! I think we need more perspective. Many of those who wait to have sex for religious reasons do so not because they have a different view of sex itself. Rather, they have a different understanding of eternity and authority. Those who believe that all we have is this life and that we cease to exist when we die, will often choose to do as they please and can see no value in waiting. In their understanding of the world, there is no authority higher than themselves. Therefore, whatever he pleases to do, he will. Those who believe in eternity and an authority higher than themselves who says it's better to wait will attribute more value to the waiting. It's not that they don't want to have sex or that they fear "losing it." They see the world through different eyes. Their understanding of eternity causes them to make decisions that don't seem to make sense to the natural mind, like waiting to have sex. Wisdom is not always gained through experience. Some things are precious and worth waiting for if you live in sight of something or Someone more worthy than your own desires. Then again, if there is nothing of more worth than what you want, you will do what you please and have what you please and live so. Certainly there are people who wish to remain virgins for non-religious reasons, and I don't mean to eclipse them in this post. I just wanted to highlight the difference between those who choose virginity for religious reasons and those who choose to have sex.

lastat06513 · Posted: Tue May 03, 2005 2:33 am Post subject:

jazblanc77 · Joined: 22 Feb 2004

huck · Joined: 19 Jan 2003

If someone is choosing to stay a virgin due to religious reasons, then is that usually because they view sex outside of marriage as evil?

Honestly, I'm just curious. I know what I believe, but I've never had it beaten into my head that sex is a sin either.

pollyplummer · Joined: 07 Mar 2005 Location: McMinnvillve, Oregon

In answer to your question, Christians generally believe that sex outside of marriage = fornication, which is explicitly prohibited by God in the Bible. But not because sex is bad in and of itself. Christians believe that God is our Father and that He knows what is best for us. They believe that He is wise beyond understanding and that He loves them. Personally, I believe there is wisdom in waiting. I don't always understand it, and it's not always easy, but it comes out of the same faith that a Christian has to have in order to believe that Jesus died for man's sins. The God who says that He gave Jesus to die for our sins is the same God who says that fornication is not good for you. And then follows trust... if He loves me enough to do that, then I must believe that He loves me even when He tells me not to do things that I cannot at all times understand with my body. That's how Christians believe in general. It's all about trusting Someone you cannot see with your eyes. And I understand how that can sound absolutely zany and bonkers to many people, even ludicrous and unfair.

shakuhachi · Joined: 08 Feb 2003 Location: Sydney

A lot of you are taking this too seriously. A great many Korean girls that are not virgins claim they are. This is because they want you to view them in the best possible light. I think you can safely bet that the majority of Korean girls telling you they are virgins are infact not virgins at all.

Happy hunting.