Korean Job Discussion Forums

mount real · Joined: 07 Apr 2005

I teach mostly uni students. Here are some of my recent conversations with the young men I teach.

"How are you today, young strapping lad?

-Oh, today was terrible. I didn't eat lunch or dinner.

-Why not?

-My mom wasn't home and there was no food, not even ramyeon, so I couldn't eat.

-?? Why didn't you go to a restaurant?

-I can't eat alone."

Number 2

"How's it going young male student in the prime of your life?

-Terrible.

-Why?

-I wanted to go to Seoul but my mommy said no and didn't want to give me any money"

I teach lots and lots of students at my school, and most young men are of this completely lost, juvenile persuasion. Is it really surprising that K-girls find financially independant (don't scoff), somewhat more open-minded guys attractive than these 20 something babies? Exception to every rule of course, but most uni boys here don't know what to do without their mommies. Yes, this is a direct response to the bashing we have gotten about Hongdae....Let's look at the flip side argument...if the mods dare.

Links · Posted: Thu Aug 11, 2005 5:53 am Post subject:

Immature fucks.

Ya-ta Boy · Joined: 16 Jan 2003 Location: Established in 1994

You haven't been in Korea very long, have you?

Korea does not value independence in university age people. They are not brought up that way. They likely think your mom does not love you because she urged you to move out soon after you were 18 (or so). They have a point.

I've known a lot of 28 year olds for some reason. One woman lived almost 2 miles from her job. She asked her mom if she could buy a bike to ride to work. Her mom refused because it would worry her. The daughter continued to walk. I have known more than one 28 year old who didn't have a key to his family apartment. Why? So they would have to ring the door bell so Mom would know what time they came home. If you spend much time with Koreans you will meet some who have to call home at specific times so Mom won't worry.

You are interpreting maturity through your cultural lens. Learning the differences was part of the reason you came here, wasn't it?

Links · Posted: Thu Aug 11, 2005 6:22 am Post subject:

mount real · Joined: 07 Apr 2005

I've been here 2 years. If you read into what I wrote, I was saying that these momma's boys attributes don't really strike me as something very attractive, sexy, not as much as a man who can do things on his own. Disagree?

JongnoGuru · Joined: 25 May 2004 Location: peeing on your doorstep

Hollywoodaction · Joined: 02 Jul 2004

desultude · Posted: Thu Aug 11, 2005 6:53 am Post subject:

My experience with male Korean students is that they are indeed young and immature before the military service, and quite adult after.

I like my make students both before and after military service, but after they are much more focused and serious.

By the way, a lot of my women friends in the States think that American men often never grow up- they're just big boys flexing their muscles and looking for toys, booze and instant gratification, and quite quick to flee anything that looks like emotional commitment. Not all, but way way too many.

PolyChronic Time Girl · Joined: 15 Dec 2004 Location: Korea Exited

I've asked about this phenomenon to my adult students. I told them I couldn't understand how some 20 even 30 somethings still live at home, get their clothes washed, dinner served to them, and money given to them. My students says there is an agenda behind all this so called "pampering": when the parents get old, the kids will be expected to take care of them full-time and sacrifice MUCH to take care of them.....payback, in other words.
We get kicked out of the home at 18, but guess what? We get to throw our parents in the retirement homes (just kidding, well, maybe not for some Laughing

periwinkle · Joined: 08 Feb 2003

I saw a drama where an old man's wife died and he was COMPLETELY helpless- didn't know where the rice was, couldn't cook rice, couldn't figure out how to manage the household finances. He was completely forlorn. His daughter had to come over every day to take care of him. I was shocked, and I asked my Korean friends about it. They said it's pretty typical for the older generation of men not to have any knowledge of how to function independently. I'll never understand why women are devalued in this society (for example, domestic abuse is not a crime here). They are the gel that holds families together.

denverdeath · Joined: 21 May 2005 Location: Boo-sahn

mount real · Joined: 07 Apr 2005

denverdeath · Joined: 21 May 2005 Location: Boo-sahn

Freezer Burn · Joined: 11 Apr 2005 Location: Busan

Living at home until you are married is detrimental to growing in to an independant mature man/woman.
The role of mother is simply transfered over to the wife once they're married, the new wife has to go through a 'training period' where she is taught what he likes and doesn't like how he likes his food etc...
How can you grow in any capacity if your mother takes care of everything, you won't learn to budget, take care of your health and diet, you can't even have a healthy courtship with your partner because you have to run off to DVD rooms or love motels.

cheem · Joined: 18 Apr 2003