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periwinkle
Joined: 08 Feb 2003
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Posted: Tue Oct 04, 2005 4:08 pm Post subject: Foreigner-Korean couples on tv |
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Have you ever seen one of those shows where the program does kind of a "day in the life" show about a foreigner married to a Korean? What do you think of those shows? The reason I'm asking is because I'm having a traditional wedding, and MBC wants to tape the wedding. I feel very negatively about it. I don't know if MBC just wanted to tape any traditional wedding, and our wedding conveniently fits into their schedule, or if the wedding hall contacted MBC or vice versa and told them a foreign woman was marrying a Korean.
My fiance is pissed at me about my attitude toward the whole thing. Frankly, I don't want half of the Korean peninsula watching my wedding. I think its private. Second, I don't want my wedding viewed as a novelty. I think these tv shows that profile mixed couples are an invasion of their privacy, and I feel somewhat embarrassed watching the shows. I really wonder what people think while they're watching the shows. I can imagine people watching my wedding thinking, "Oh-she looks so weird in a hanbok. Korean women look so much better than she does." and "Oh, she looks so awkward bowing" and "Her father should really color his grays..", etc., etc., etc.
Am I just oversensitive? My fiance thinks I have a piss-poor attitude about the whole thing. Sigh... |
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Zyzyfer

Joined: 29 Jan 2003 Location: who, what, where, when, why, how?
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Posted: Tue Oct 04, 2005 4:10 pm Post subject: |
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I agree. I wouldn't would TV cameras and crap all over the place and more people seeing the wedding than were invited. |
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Ya-ta Boy
Joined: 16 Jan 2003 Location: Established in 1994
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Posted: Tue Oct 04, 2005 4:17 pm Post subject: |
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I would feel the same way you do. It strikes me as an invasion of privacy. I have no understanding of people who do private things in public, like three-headed nuns talking about their brawl at the tavern on those talk shows.
The Korean weddings I've been to have all been filmed and I've even been forced to sit through a screening of one of them, so it's possible the idea of a cameraman running around shoving cameras in people's faces is OK by Korean standards. It's not by mine. |
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VanIslander

Joined: 18 Aug 2003 Location: Geoje, Hadong, Tongyeong,... now in a small coastal island town outside Gyeongsangnamdo!
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Posted: Tue Oct 04, 2005 4:23 pm Post subject: Re: Foreigner-Korean couples on tv |
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periwinkle wrote: |
Frankly, I don't want half of the Korean peninsula watching my wedding. I think its private. Second, I don't want my wedding viewed as a novelty. |
That's all that matters.
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My fiance is pissed at me about my attitude toward the whole thing. |
Tell him you don't want it. Why would he want it so much? ask him why it matters so much to him, and tell him why it bothers you, not to convince him, but to get him to understand. If he doesn't understand, he should still respect your feelings on this.
Don't give in on this. Stand firm. You are NOT oversensitive. Your husband-to-be is being INSENSITIVE.
Just say no. |
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ilovebdt

Joined: 03 Jun 2005 Location: Nr Seoul
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Posted: Tue Oct 04, 2005 4:37 pm Post subject: Re: Foreigner-Korean couples on tv |
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periwinkle wrote: |
Have you ever seen one of those shows where the program does kind of a "day in the life" show about a foreigner married to a Korean? What do you think of those shows? The reason I'm asking is because I'm having a traditional wedding, and MBC wants to tape the wedding. I feel very negatively about it. I don't know if MBC just wanted to tape any traditional wedding, and our wedding conveniently fits into their schedule, or if the wedding hall contacted MBC or vice versa and told them a foreign woman was marrying a Korean.
My fiance is pissed at me about my attitude toward the whole thing. Frankly, I don't want half of the Korean peninsula watching my wedding. I think its private. Second, I don't want my wedding viewed as a novelty. I think these tv shows that profile mixed couples are an invasion of their privacy, and I feel somewhat embarrassed watching the shows. I really wonder what people think while they're watching the shows. I can imagine people watching my wedding thinking, "Oh-she looks so weird in a hanbok. Korean women look so much better than she does." and "Oh, she looks so awkward bowing" and "Her father should really color his grays..", etc., etc., etc.
Am I just oversensitive? My fiance thinks I have a piss-poor attitude about the whole thing. Sigh... |
I completely agree with you. I would'nt want a TV company to film my wedding. It is a private matter. You don't want a film crew and producer running around spoiling your day and pissing everyone off with their demands.
Why is your fiance so keen on the idea? |
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periwinkle
Joined: 08 Feb 2003
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Posted: Tue Oct 04, 2005 4:54 pm Post subject: |
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Heh-why is he so keen on the idea? Maybe he wants to show off his trophy to anyone and everyone. Blech. I'm just depressed because this is happening 2 days before the wedding. Actually, I don't think he cares one way or the other about having the wedding shown on national tv. He's more annoyed at my attitude and the chip I have on my shoulder about the way foreigners are treated in Korea. I get stared at enough as it is. I don't want to give people another excuse to point at me and talk about me. |
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Hanson

Joined: 20 Oct 2004
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Posted: Tue Oct 04, 2005 4:56 pm Post subject: |
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Have you ever seen one of those shows where the program does kind of a "day in the life" show about a foreigner married to a Korean? What do you think of those shows? |
My wife (Korean) loves those shows, and tells me all about them when I get home from work. I have issues with them, as it perpetuates the Korean habit of gossiping about foreigners, the "curiosity-gone-wild" way they deal with foreigners.
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My fiance is pissed at me about my attitude toward the whole thing. Frankly, I don't want half of the Korean peninsula watching my wedding. |
Maybe that's exactly why he wants MBC to televise the wedding - so that people can see him/you on tv? I think my wife would have also embraced the idea of broadcasting our wedding, clearly reflecting a difference in what she and I want, and a difference in how such a broadcast is viewed by she and I.
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I can imagine people watching my wedding thinking, "Oh-she looks so weird in a hanbok. Korean women look so much better than she does." and "Oh, she looks so awkward bowing" and "Her father should really color his grays..", etc., etc., etc. |
So can I... But I can just hear my wife's reaction (and possibly your fiance's reaction, I don't know...) being something like 'no, no, they (Koreans) are just interested in how foreigners live, yada yada yada... |
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djsmnc

Joined: 20 Jan 2003 Location: Dave's ESL Cafe
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Posted: Tue Oct 04, 2005 4:59 pm Post subject: |
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What a crock of shit. Last week I was eating some doeji galbi with my girly when some tv crew came in to do a bit about the ajumma cooking pigskin. Sure as shit, all the cameras were conveniently focused with me in the background. When I was paying for the food they said someting to the effect of "Ottokhe? Waegookin ga yo? Ottokhe?"
My girlfriend said they were discussing the necessity of showing a foreigner enjoying the food. Needless to say, she was pretty pissed off about them having to use my image.
If they were going to film my wedding, I'd demand a lot of money. |
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ilovebdt

Joined: 03 Jun 2005 Location: Nr Seoul
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Posted: Tue Oct 04, 2005 5:04 pm Post subject: |
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periwinkle wrote: |
Heh-why is he so keen on the idea? Maybe he wants to show off his trophy to anyone and everyone. Blech. I'm just depressed because this is happening 2 days before the wedding. Actually, I don't think he cares one way or the other about having the wedding shown on national tv. He's more annoyed at my attitude and the chip I have on my shoulder about the way foreigners are treated in Korea. I get stared at enough as it is. I don't want to give people another excuse to point at me and talk about me. |
They asked you 2 days before the wedding???? Well, that's good. You can tell them that is logistically impossible to incorporate them into your wedding at such short notice.
I understand where you are coming from with the staring thing. I don't get it much but if I am in a certain mood it can really piss me off. That and the touching. Ewww. |
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ulsanchris
Joined: 19 Jun 2003 Location: take a wild guess
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Posted: Tue Oct 04, 2005 5:07 pm Post subject: |
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I hate those shows. Usually the westerner speaks better korean than i can and my wife complains about my lack of korean ability afterwards.
i would say no to mbc taping the wedding. |
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periwinkle
Joined: 08 Feb 2003
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Posted: Tue Oct 04, 2005 5:16 pm Post subject: |
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djsmnc wrote: |
My girlfriend said they were discussing the necessity of showing a foreigner enjoying the food. Needless to say, she was pretty pissed off about them having to use my image.
If they were going to film my wedding, I'd demand a lot of money. |
I know that in the states, photographers and tv crews have to get a signed release from you stating it's ok to use your image, or else you can sue them. Maybe Koreans aren't big into privacy here. After what happened to the dog poo girl, if anyone comes near me with a camera, they're going to get their face bashed in.
So did you ask them to pay for your dinner? I would've changed seats with my girl or moved tables if I were you. God, they love making spectacles of us, don't they?
I told my fiance to tell MBC/wedding hall that we want 2,000,000 won. I know we won't get it. Anyway, I know the wedding hall would be getting some money from MBC for using the location. Being on tv doesn't benefit me whatsoever except to make me even more visible in the community, and the thing I want most is for people to leave me alone and treat me like a normal person. |
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djsmnc

Joined: 20 Jan 2003 Location: Dave's ESL Cafe
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Posted: Tue Oct 04, 2005 5:24 pm Post subject: |
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I didn't get any compensation, and I wasn't going to fight over it and cause a spectacle then. We had other business to tend to, and they didn't make me do an interview. I was a bit hazy from some Bamboo alcohol and a belly full of pork, so I just brushed them off.
Koreans seem to be big on reality shows, moreso than in the US. In the US they arrange a group of ordinary people, prep them, and pay them for their time. In Korea they do like Uncle Fred at Billy's birthday party in 1986 with the family's first camcorder: shove it in your face and expect you to say something cute. |
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Octavius Hite

Joined: 28 Jan 2004 Location: Househunting, looking for a new bunker from which to convert the world to homosexuality.
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Posted: Tue Oct 04, 2005 5:35 pm Post subject: |
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I wouldn't let them because just last year korean TV was showing that lovely little program about us giving dope to school girls, sexually assulting them, being unqualified, etc. Korean tv is not to be trusted, they manipulate all the time and what garuntee do you have that they won't use your wedding for some crazy expose or comedy show. |
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SuperFly

Joined: 09 Jul 2003 Location: In the doghouse
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Posted: Tue Oct 04, 2005 5:43 pm Post subject: |
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I wouldn't do it.
Last edited by SuperFly on Tue Oct 04, 2005 8:46 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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fidel
Joined: 07 Feb 2003 Location: North Shore NZ
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Posted: Tue Oct 04, 2005 5:55 pm Post subject: |
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Hell no!
I had the same issue as you with KBS (my wife used to work for KBS) wanting to do a documentary on my family, I gave them a flat out 'not a chance' and that was the end of the discussion. |
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