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my coteacher is driving me insane!!!!
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butter808fly



Joined: 09 May 2004
Location: Northern California, USA

PostPosted: Thu Oct 20, 2005 3:32 am    Post subject: my coteacher is driving me insane!!!! Reply with quote

I feel almost not able to vent anymore because I feel like giving in, but I am not going to give in... its not my style! My coteacher is driving me up the wall! Insane! Loco! CRAZY!

I started teaching public school about 2 months ago now. I thought that this would be ironed out by now, but it hasnt. My coteacher is 50 years old and she seems to really have some control or power issues. I dont know how to get her to see this or to let me have some of the control?!?

ARGHGHGHGHG.. should I cry or scream!

I went into this job thinking I would be in charge of how the class is run. The coteacher would translate when need be and remain chill on the sidelines. I found out that that isnt the case. So, I bent a little and made every effort to do true 'coteaching'. Sharing the teaching and the material presenation.

This freakin teacher! I really hate working with her. Let me start from the stairs we must climb to get to the classrooms. She always has to be one step ahead of me. Its like if I jog, she jogs faster, if I walk slow, she walks with me but just a bit faster. I swear if I ran up the stairs at full speed shed begin to do so until she realizes that she looks like a moron. Do you get the psychological mindset here?

So, I tell her, okay you do this part well and I do this well, lets do these seperate parts okay? She then preceeds to take as long as possible during her part, and then during my part she is writing on the board, playing with her phone in front of class, or talking to students.

Today, I get my 5 minute part she allows me and I add a little drama into it. The next class, she steals my drama bit and does the same exact thing. It FREAKIN ANNOYS ME TO NO END!!!!! She has done this more than once. twice, three times and more.

I ask her after class, in the most calm and kind way I can (actually that was a month ago, now she just really really really really aggravates me!) What is your problem???? Why do you steal my scenes. Why do you undermine my authority. Why do you punish the kids during my speaking (shes likes to punish them while i talk, but cant control them worth a darn while she speaks.. I can do my own control!)

Lets not even talk about discipline. She has no control over students whatsoever except for the fact that she can talk to children like a sweet old lady. Its hard to hurt sweet old ladys feelings... but let me tell you, she aint that sweet! Ive tried to take control of the classes but then I look like the big bad wolf because I get hardly any talking time but then do all the discipline. (im talking 6th graders here)

Just writing this, all this anger is bubbling up. I hate working with her! This week she is actually trying to talk English in class. She usually asks 'whats happeneing?' and then the children answer all her questions in Korean. She then conducts the whole part in Korean. But, we have a demo presentation tomorrow and man, look at her speak English! Inaccurate as it is. I get my 5 minutes 'repeat after the good pronuncation girl' time and thats it. I so hope she looks like a moron tomorrow, but what do I look like when I stand aside and say nothing? But Ive TRIED AND TRIED AND TRIED.

Today, she usually sits down to teach and I chill at back because she doesnt let me talk anyways. I can not chill any longer. I hate my job right now and it has so much promise. I stood at the front today. Surprisingly she didnt sit down even one time today, like every single other day. Whenever she talks she makes sure she puts her body physically in front of me (distane wise). She even sometimes stands right in front of me sometimes. Like, are you freakin for real? Body language speaks millions.

Shes a moron. I hate teaching with her.

I see her problem. She doesnt want me there. She doesnt want to share. She things all us waegooks are good for is pronunciation, when in fact Ive already told her the literature says that when children are taught in all English, they learn faster. She doesnt get it. She doesnt want to get it.

And now I have a headache.

Help!

Should I go to someone in higher authority than me? Should I grin and bare it until she leaves next school year (2 more months)?

(I saw the most perfect artwork today that represents how I feel at my place of employment. It was a bunch of cute little hearts of all sorts of colors pasted to a black piece of paper. Oddly, in the middle of these hearts was a bright silver middle finger symbol!)
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joe_doufu



Joined: 09 May 2005
Location: Elsewhere

PostPosted: Thu Oct 20, 2005 4:23 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Go to a higher authority. You can't really be sure that in two months, you won't be told that she's leaving the school in another two months. Things change and you ought to be the one getting them changed, not waiting and suffering. If you have to, suggest to the boss that your co-worker physically leave the room for the second half of the class period.
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deessell



Joined: 08 Jun 2005

PostPosted: Thu Oct 20, 2005 5:01 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I would be a little careful in this situation. In your contract and by definition of the EPIK programme you are only a teacher's assistant. I personally would not go to a higher authority at the school. This might be interpreted as you being difficult to work with and her being a senior member of staff will give her the upper hand. The teachers' union could get involved. Is there a teacher in the English department that you feel that you might be able to communicate with?

This is a really difficult situation to be in and I would probably look for another job.

I hope things improve and don't be put off by Public Schools as there are good ones out there. Mine is a great place to work.
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peppermint



Joined: 13 May 2003
Location: traversing the minefields of caddishness.

PostPosted: Thu Oct 20, 2005 5:03 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Don't do that ( take Joe dofu's advice)if you're at a public school. There, the Korean teachers ( especially if they're older) have tenure, and foreign teachers are in no position to make demands like that. At a hagwon it would probably work though.

I sympathize, I've got an incompetent and slightly rude co teacher myself. Pre- empt her. We both know how sucky the games are in the textbook ( and they're really badly explained even in Korean) Come up with something better and don't let her know until you show up in the classroom with the materials. ( ideally let the students see you prepping, and get them enthused about it before she even knows) That way, you're running the show.

( let her win the stair battle though, it's really not worth fighting)
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VanIslander



Joined: 18 Aug 2003
Location: Geoje, Hadong, Tongyeong,... now in a small coastal island town outside Gyeongsangnamdo!

PostPosted: Thu Oct 20, 2005 5:31 am    Post subject: Re: my coteacher is driving me insane!!!! Reply with quote

butter808fly wrote:
...I started teaching public school... My coteacher is 50 years old ... I went into this job thinking I would be in charge of how the class is run. The coteacher would translate when need be and remain chill on the sidelines. ... She doesnt want me there. She doesnt want to share. She things all us waegooks are good for is pronunciation,... she leaves next school year (2 more months)?

You were naive to expect an experienced and OLD Korean co-teacher to be your passive assistant. Where did you get that idea? Not by doing any research into Korean culture or precedence.

Lump it for two more months. She'll be gone then. Knowing the endpoint makes the suffering more bearable.

Grin Smile and bear it.
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ThePoet



Joined: 15 May 2004
Location: No longer in Korea - just lurking here

PostPosted: Thu Oct 20, 2005 6:58 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Well, I think I would choose one of two options.

1. Do what she does to you -- play with your phone while she talks (theres some fun games on the new phones I hear - I just found Nintendo ROMS for my little Zaurus palmtop), make fun of her drama ability openly, undermine her authority...make her go a little crazy so she gets a taste of her own medicine. If she complains to you, tell her you are doing nothing different than she is doing.

But since I am the "assistant", I would do this:

2. Sit back, relax, do exactly what she asks me to do, no more, no less -- don't take a personal interest in it, and collect my paycheque at the end of every month...meanwhile, I'd be smiling at the great money I was saving because of the easy work in Korea, and how little work I have to do to get it. This ensures you don't stress yourself out for this.

Poet
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mindmetoo



Joined: 02 Feb 2004

PostPosted: Thu Oct 20, 2005 7:17 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I've noticed that older women and younger women can have a really weird competitive thing going on. My feeling is the older woman takes one look at the younger woman, thinks to herself "My husband is going to get drunk at the up coming Christmas party and hit on that little bitch all night! So I'm going to be really ignorant to her. That will show her for being young and tempting!"

Other times the older woman is used to being the only woman in a heavily male dominated environment and trades on that. Suddenly the younger competition comes in and the guys no longer treat the hag with the slavering attention they used to... now transferring their slavering attention to the younger woman. Naturally the older woman doesn't like the sudden evaporation of the attention and decides to blame the younger woman...
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denverdeath



Joined: 21 May 2005
Location: Boo-sahn

PostPosted: Thu Oct 20, 2005 7:24 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

ThePoet wrote:
2. Sit back, relax, do exactly what she asks me to do, no more, no less -- don't take a personal interest in it, and collect my paycheque at the end of every month...meanwhile, I'd be smiling at the great money I was saving because of the easy work in Korea, and how little work I have to do to get it. This ensures you don't stress yourself out for this.

Poet


Excellent advice!
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BigBlackEquus



Joined: 05 Jul 2005
Location: Lotte controls Asia with bad chocolate!

PostPosted: Thu Oct 20, 2005 7:42 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

You could try correcting her English several times a day in front of the students. That will put her in her place.
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Angrycareb



Joined: 25 Aug 2005
Location: Wifi Monkey Land

PostPosted: Thu Oct 20, 2005 12:47 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

1) this isn't even worth the stress you've put into it. so what, she hogs your class; she gets paid a lot less and you get paid a lot more. enjoy the cakewalk you've been handed.

2) either hit the stairs before she does and dash to the top or wait for her to get there first and follow her up.

3) when she uses her hand phone during your five minutes of teaching, politely reach over and take it from her. to hammer the point home by holding the phone up to the class and telling the students that using a phone while you are teaching is not allowed.

don't give her the phone back until after your class.

4) she is older than you, so get used to her pushing you around. (besides, she probably really likes you and thinks you're neat)

5) don't go above her.

6) drink more beer after work like everyone else does; using alcohol to cope with a crappy job will help you sleep better and, most of all, be chill about this.
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butter808fly



Joined: 09 May 2004
Location: Northern California, USA

PostPosted: Thu Oct 20, 2005 2:30 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Angrycareb wrote:


3) when she uses her hand phone during your five minutes of teaching, politely reach over and take it from her. to hammer the point home by holding the phone up to the class and telling the students that using a phone while you are teaching is not allowed.

don't give her the phone back until after your class.
.

6) drink more beer after work like everyone else does; using alcohol to cope with a crappy job will help you sleep better and, most of all, be chill about this.


lol... I thought you were going to say hammer it into the ground.. the cell phone that is. Funny... thank you for all the advice. I AM putting to much stress into this. Seriously, I have tried to sit back and just do as Im told. I am just to independent. I am a teacher, sure for the money, but I like to teach also! I want to teach! I hope many of you do too.

Reply to one poster, I have done my research on Korean culture and been here over a year. I realize her thinking that she is 20 years older than me therefore I should respect her and she gets the say so. My character refuses to hand her a paper with one hand only. But still, in my mind she does not have my respect. I see her as a possibly good kindergarden teacher. How she has lasted in this field for 20 years is beyond me!

Thank you for the advice. I think I will wait it out for 2 more months. If she doesnt leave, I will probably look for another job. Maybe this is a lesson in humbleness, but I cant sit around and ask her to dictate to me what to do (and not do) when she has not clue on how to teach English properly.
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Wrench



Joined: 07 Apr 2005

PostPosted: Thu Oct 20, 2005 3:23 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Get used to it. I am being driven nuts by one of my coteachers as well.
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Yu_Bum_suk



Joined: 25 Dec 2004

PostPosted: Thu Oct 20, 2005 3:36 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

And here I was getting annoyed by co-teachers always giving the kids the answers. Yesterday I was so happy when one of my co-teachers was off on a business trip and couldn't roam around uselessly at the back of the class trying to be top student. Downside: had to confiscate a handphone and wake a few students up. Upside: 50 minutes of students actually having to think for themselves.

In your case I'd say just sit back, do what she says, and collect your paycheque.
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livinginkorea



Joined: 11 Jun 2004
Location: Korea, South of the border

PostPosted: Thu Oct 20, 2005 3:49 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I agree with the Poet. Just relax. If she wants to get worked up over it then let her. Obviously she feels that she has to show who the real teacher is to the students.

I was teaching solo for a while as my co teacher was in the class, just answering my questions (not playing with her phone thank God) but I think that she was afraid that she wouldn't be seen as a teacher by the kids. So now she has more involvement in the class which is great for me as I can have some relaxation. Of course this doesn't mean that I sit down and read a book but I'm glad that I'm not doing all the teaching.

Don't get worked over it. We are the native teachers but we can teach anywhere. If you don't like it quit. 40 and 50 year old ajummas can't.
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The Hierophant



Joined: 13 Sep 2005

PostPosted: Thu Oct 20, 2005 4:09 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Angrycareb wrote:


6) drink more beer after work like everyone else does; using alcohol to cope with a crappy job will help you sleep better and, most of all, be chill about this.


HEh heh, dude, teaching is not a crappy job. Even if you have to deal with pushy old ladies Smile Before going to university I worked on a factory production line. Now THAT was a crappy job Smile

I concur with the advice of 'don't stress out too much about this'. If anything you'll look back on this as a funny, quirky life experience. A nice story to tell the grandkids (if you are grandkids-inclined Smile).
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