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neandergirl
Joined: 23 Jun 2005
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 Posted: Sat Oct 22, 2005 6:20 pm Post subject: |
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| I find I appreciate the little things more (turnips!) but that's true for when I travel around Asia too (no one driving on the sidewalks!). Yes, it's changed (some good, some sad, some bad IMO) and so have I. Life's like that - you know - the opposite of static. |
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EFLtrainer
Joined: 04 May 2005
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| Posted: Sat Oct 22, 2005 6:30 pm Post subject: |
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| neandergirl wrote: |
| I find I appreciate the little things more (turnips!) but that's true for when I travel around Asia too (no one driving on the sidewalks!). Yes, it's changed (some good, some sad, some bad IMO) and so have I. Life's like that - you know - the opposite of static. |
Yes, this is what I find: both change. However, I am always shocked at how much it hasn't changed in general, but how much my connections with people have changed. The social whirl is always shifting, but I notice it more when away for a along time.
When I returned from my first long stretch out of the States I had to completely rebuilding my social life, but the place itself, overall, seemed depressingly unchanged. I suspect now returning would be like going into some regressed version of the place that I wouldn't be too thrilled with. |
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Red
Joined: 05 Jul 2004
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| Posted: Sat Oct 22, 2005 9:03 pm Post subject: |
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| chest rockwell wrote: |
| If so, wouldnt you feel alienated and always searching for something. |
Yuppers!
| Quote: |
| Everyone needs a home. |
It's where you hang your hat/ where your heart lies |
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krats1976
Joined: 14 May 2003
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| Posted: Sat Oct 22, 2005 9:14 pm Post subject: |
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I'm going home soon for the second time since I came to Korea. When I went home last Christmas, I was ready to come back after a week (my trip was 3 weeks). Yes, my family had changed. Yes, I had changed. But the biggest thing was that I wasn't at home. Everyone else had their lives and schedules and I was just wandering around visiting people who had time to see me.
So, the thing that makes me uncomfortable about being at home is feeling like I don't have a place or purpose while I'm there. I'm sure if/when I move back to live that feeling will go away once I'm ensconced in a job and my own place again.
Last edited by krats1976 on Sat Oct 22, 2005 11:47 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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desultude
Joined: 15 Jan 2003
Location: Dangling my toes in the Persian Gulf
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| Posted: Sat Oct 22, 2005 10:53 pm Post subject: |
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| krats1976 wrote: |
I'm going home for the second time since I came to Korea. When I went home last Christmas, I was ready to come back after a week (my trip was 3 weeks). Yes, my family had changed. Yes, I had changed. But the biggest thing was that I wasn't at home. Everyone else had their lives and schedules and I was just wandering around visiting people who had time to see me.
So, the thing that makes me uncomfortable about being at home is feeling like I don't have a place or purpose while I'm there. I'm sure if/when I move back to live that feeling will go away once I'm ensconced in a job and my own place again. |
That's a big part of it. I am going to the U.S. for 2 months starting late December. If I start something there, in terms of relationships or endeavors, I will be leaving it behind, and if I don't get involved in something, I will be some sort of a spectator for that period. Either way involves a sort of alienation, in the way that alienation implies separation and being an outsider.
We can deal with our alienation in interesting and creative ways, but either here or there, it is alienation. and we are alien- at least most of us, anyway. |
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tzechuk
Joined: 20 Dec 2004
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| Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2005 1:24 am Post subject: |
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| mindmetoo wrote: |
| It's weird. The first few days back everything seems alien. By about day 4 it's like you never left. |
I quite agree with this statement. That is, except last year, when my father died and nothing seems the same since. |
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Tiger Beer
Joined: 07 Feb 2003
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| Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2005 2:03 am Post subject: Re: for those that have been here a year or more |
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| chest rockwell wrote: |
| have you found that when youve gone home for a holiday or whatever that everything that you knew and loved back home has changed? |
Not really.. I felt more like that when I was gone away to college and back to the hometown for the summer.
Now its been 17 years out of High School.. and the hometown seems to look pretty much the same as always - and everyone is still doing the exact same things.. and even the conversations themselves never seem to change.
The only big difference is I notice is absolutely everyone I know looks understandably older each time back. |
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captain kirk
Joined: 29 Jan 2003
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| Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2005 7:15 am Post subject: |
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I don't want to get all 'psychological' on you but I was thinking about that today. About 'home'.
I was at the Seoul Air Show just outside the base wall on a hillside and there was this 7 year old boy who kept saying 'oppa'. Shouting it. He did this every twenty seconds for a few minutes. I turned and looked at him like 'shut up you annoying little kid, get real'. Why didn't he just go to where his father was at instead of calling out? Is he trying to stay in touch, keeping connected. I thought of 'calling out to one's parents'. As a child would, always expecting a warm response. Safety, support. The core of the sense of home.
In every person there are the formative years when we were all that child calling out to parents.
About home visits my brother and sister have changed since becoming parents. I can't pin it down but the old bro and sis aren't as easygoing as they were before.
About geography Canada is vast, so much empty space and driving across wildnerness. And winter. Well, winter. 6 months of winter.
Home seems to be memories calling out from what has long ago passed. Except in the minds of those you shared moments with.
Which is nostalgia? More nostalgia than living? Something real there, anyway. |
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