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Korean Job Discussion Forums "The Internet's Meeting Place for ESL/EFL Teachers from Around the World!"
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Demophobe

Joined: 17 May 2004
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Posted: Wed Jan 04, 2006 5:12 pm Post subject: |
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| Merlyn wrote: |
| I have to agree with Homer on this one. The original poster overreacted with their kick of the cart. Think of the Ajumma as a woman who doesn't know better, or more like an animal. If you're playing with your dog and it bites you a bit too hard do you kick him. I hope not. And then when she spilled her drink over herself, a little I'm sorry was in order for your outlandishness. You have to have better control over your feelings than that. Everyone's been in that situation before. |
I agree, though I think your reference to Koreans and dogs is....well....interesting.
There are many ways to handle this situation and the OP certainly chose the "falling down" way. I usually just slightly turn, look down at the offending cart, followed by a slow rise to the driver. It always ends up with them saying sorry and me half-smiling understandingly. On a bad day, no expression, just turn back with a slight "man..everytime" head shake. |
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JongnoGuru

Joined: 25 May 2004 Location: peeing on your doorstep
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Posted: Wed Jan 04, 2006 6:12 pm Post subject: |
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| Demophobe wrote: |
| I usually just slightly turn, look down at the offending cart, followed by a slow rise to the driver. It always ends up with them saying sorry and me half-smiling understandingly. On a bad day, no expression, just turn back with a slight "man..everytime" head shake. |
Although I said earlier that I liked the OP's back-kick option, the fact of the matter is, my standard response and that of nearly everyone (including the OP, I'll wager) is going to be the same as Demophobe's or close enough. We're not serial shopping cart kickers. But that's not to say that any one of us, under the right conditions, won't lose it. And that's all the OP did. She considered her options and made a choice, but then asked her husband about it afterwards and even came here, where she's not an especially active poster, and posted this "guess what I just did" thread. The incident and her behaviour are exceptional in her mind. This is a thread about someone who lost it momentarily. Big deal. Who hasn't? (You _don't_ want to be around me in a department store on bargain sale days.) |
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Hobophobic

Joined: 16 Aug 2004 Location: Sinjeong negorie mokdong oh ga ri samgyup sal fighting
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Posted: Wed Jan 04, 2006 10:23 pm Post subject: |
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I love all those stray carts, with items in them, in the middle of everything and everyone, while there seems no-owner in sight as I am shopping with any number of elbowsand feet in my groin, ear, a$$, and kidneys... tis a true delight....
I love the morning subway cattle round up when it's so cramped my music is shut off and I can't move my arms to turn it back on or stop the creepy ajumma from touching my bottom while eeriely smiling...
I love the sound of snot as it rattles its way from the lungs, back of throat, and sinus cavity and is after seemingly shot out towards my feet...or better yet...not shot out at all...
I love the sidewalk shuffle-dance I perform, because of the 'yes, I am half your, height, speed, and weight, but possibly 10x older' person who although doesn't see me...manages to be in my way whether I am closing in from the front or behind...and there is no one else anywhere near either of us.. .
I love the STOP anywhere anytime for no visible reason....it's gotta be a balliballi power nap while on the tear...reset system thingy...
BUT, I most especially love the fact that I am learning to be able to do all those things as well, and if I keep practicing for the KORATHALON I will someday.....  |
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Mashimaro

Joined: 31 Jan 2003 Location: location, location
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Posted: Wed Jan 04, 2006 11:54 pm Post subject: |
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| HapKi wrote: |
I also think one shouldn't worry about a lack of Korean skills in a situation like this. It really shouldn't matter what you say, but how you say it. And I'm sure they'll get the message according to your tone and expression.
Once you start using Korean, you've given them the advantage, should a verbal fight ensue. |
why on earth would a verbal fight ensue if the op said something calmly in korean
There really are some angry, seemingly feeling very alienated people on this board |
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HapKi

Joined: 10 Dec 2004 Location: TALL BUILDING-SEOUL
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Posted: Thu Jan 05, 2006 12:23 am Post subject: |
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Mashimaro- We've got a back kick at one extreme, doing nothing and living with the pent-up rage at the other, and all sorts of stare downs and head shakes in-between. Saying something "calmly in Korean," is a nice option to think about in the comfort of your computer room (or wherever you are), but obviously not everyone on this board is as cool-headed as you.
| Quote: |
| There really are some angry, seemingly feeling very alienated people on this board |
I disagree. Far from being alienating, being able to tell off the locals proves you to be part of the community (Koreans do it to each other all the time). Not going as far as to say we as foreigners must be a force to be reckoned with- but something like that. |
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Pak Yu Man

Joined: 02 Jun 2005 Location: The Ida galaxy
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Posted: Thu Jan 05, 2006 2:44 am Post subject: |
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I hate shopping here.
Same sort of thing. I was on the KTX going from Cheon an to Daegu.
There was this Ajuma sitting in my seat...no big deal I sat down, on what I assumed was her seat.
So anyways she falls asleep and she's taking up a quarter of my seat.
So eventually a quarter becomes a half and I shake her leg and woke her up. Can you believe she was pissed cause I woke her.
So she's awake and about 30 mins later her leg is yet again entering my territory. So I start shaking my leg. She actually hit my leg. It was bothering her that her leg was touching mine and I was on vibration mode.
I just lost it and started yelling at her. K-girl comes along and takes the older persons side so this pisses me off even more.
Finally I explain the situation to the old bag. "Don't touch me...or else" |
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JongnoGuru

Joined: 25 May 2004 Location: peeing on your doorstep
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Posted: Thu Jan 05, 2006 3:00 am Post subject: |
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Koreans are still getting with the programme. It wouldn't kill us to give them a few more generations.
At least they aren't druggies. |
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dogbert

Joined: 29 Jan 2003 Location: Killbox 90210
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Posted: Thu Jan 05, 2006 5:18 pm Post subject: |
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| JongnoGuru wrote: |
Koreans are still getting with the programme. It wouldn't kill us to give them a few more generations.
At least they aren't druggies. |
That's right -- they're on a natural high. |
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TheUrbanMyth
Joined: 28 Jan 2003 Location: Retired
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Posted: Fri Jan 06, 2006 12:34 am Post subject: |
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| JongnoGuru wrote: |
| Demophobe wrote: |
| I usually just slightly turn, look down at the offending cart, followed by a slow rise to the driver. It always ends up with them saying sorry and me half-smiling understandingly. On a bad day, no expression, just turn back with a slight "man..everytime" head shake. |
Although I said earlier that I liked the OP's back-kick option, the fact of the matter is, my standard response and that of nearly everyone (including the OP, I'll wager) is going to be the same as Demophobe's or close enough. We're not serial shopping cart kickers. But that's not to say that any one of us, under the right conditions, won't lose it. And that's all the OP did. She considered her options and made a choice, but then asked her husband about it afterwards and even came here, where she's not an especially active poster, and posted this "guess what I just did" thread. The incident and her behaviour are exceptional in her mind. This is a thread about someone who lost it momentarily. Big deal. Who hasn't? (You _don't_ want to be around me in a department store on bargain sale days.) |
(italics are mine)
Do you consider all your options before "losing it"? Even momentarily?
That said kicking the cart was not the best option..but I bet it felt pretty good, at least for a while. |
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peppermint

Joined: 13 May 2003 Location: traversing the minefields of caddishness.
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Posted: Fri Jan 06, 2006 2:08 am Post subject: |
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Cut the OP some slack. I'm guessing that's not her standard response to these kinds of things, but people have off days and bad reactions to fairly common stuff sometimes. Counterproductive as they may be, those bad reactions can feel great.
unfortunate that the soda exploded though. |
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sistersarah
Joined: 03 Jan 2004 Location: hiding out
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Posted: Fri Jan 06, 2006 2:56 am Post subject: |
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never go to costco on a saturday! i learned my lesson about doing that! now i go after work around 8 and it closes at 10....enough time to run around and get what i need. if it's not absolutely necessary, don't do it.
my husband, on the other hand, doesn't mind. he can get bumped, wait for countless people to butt in front of him, he'll rush the sample tables for the last piece of samgyupsal....it's hilarious. but after having nearly blown up a few times at places such as costco, homeplus and e-mart, he feels it's best not to take me there on a weekend.
i totally understand the OP. everyone has those moments, not just in korea, but everywhere. |
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Merlyn
Joined: 08 Dec 2004 Location: Korea
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Posted: Sat Jan 07, 2006 8:57 pm Post subject: |
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| everyone has those moments, not just in korea, but everywhere. |
Let's just say that you have those feelings and others as well, but not everyone. It is never okay to go ape. And even if you think you're going to go ape on someone, just stay home. No excuses. |
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riley
Joined: 08 Feb 2003 Location: where creditors can find me
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Posted: Sun Jan 08, 2006 12:57 am Post subject: |
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Oh for the love of God!
I'm sick of all of these perfect people lecturing over how bad it is to overreact. Be more honest and accept that you too have overreacted at times. I know I have.
I've been rude to people or shoved people here. I too should not go to Costco or other places on Saturday afternoons. Of course, I try to go nowadays because I know that I need to improve. I don't think the OP was bragging, (who would brag about being a crazy white woman?) I think she was simply telling a story and seeing if anyone else has acted similarly. So stop telling her how bad she is and how we must be perfect at all times. |
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Merlyn
Joined: 08 Dec 2004 Location: Korea
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Posted: Sun Jan 08, 2006 4:38 am Post subject: |
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| So stop telling her how bad she is and how we must be perfect at all times. |
She doesn't have to be perfect at all the time. She or anyone else can blow up when ever they please, but don't justify it as good and normal behaviour. I got really angry like that too when I was in elementary school and didn't know how to handle things thrown my way. |
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Thunndarr

Joined: 30 Sep 2003
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Posted: Sun Jan 08, 2006 6:04 am Post subject: |
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| Merlyn wrote: |
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| So stop telling her how bad she is and how we must be perfect at all times. |
She doesn't have to be perfect at all the time. She or anyone else can blow up when ever they please, but don't justify it as good and normal behaviour. I got really angry like that too when I was in elementary school and didn't know how to handle things thrown my way. |
I agree. Occasionally losing one's temper is completely abnormal. What a normal, healthy person does is make a tight ball of rage and force it down deep, deep inside. And then, when you can't force it down any more, you just push a little harder. That, my friends, is true mental and emotional well-being. |
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