Korean Job Discussion Forums

[kermo]

[daskalos]

I voted Other. I'd have voted for Arms at Sides if it didn't have the reanimated corpse qualifier. So, here's how to stand with you arms at your sides and look natural (you will want to practice in a mirror):

1) What to do with your arms - You want your arms hanging relaxed (relaxedly?) and very slightly bent at the elbows. Looking straight on at yourself in the mirror, your arms should form a sort of lazy set of parentheses to your body.

2) What to do with your hands - Fingers should be curled inward, again, relaxed(ly). The best way I can find to describe what they should look like is to have you imagine how they would look if you were playing tug-o-war with a thick rope, just before you start tugging. Now imagine the rope isn't there, and so there are your hands with fingers curling in. What you notice if you have achieved this little exercise in imagining is that your pinky is the finger most curled, your ring finger slightly less curled, your middle finger less so and your index finger just only slightly bent.

3) Now what? So that's the neutral, standing-around-without-having-to-do-anything-with-your-arms stance. To maintain the illusion of its being natural, you'll want to alternate with other stances. Once in awhile you can a) make more of fist, b) make less of a fist, c) look at your watch, if you have one, d) look at your wrist like you forgot you don't have a watch, if you don't have one, e) any of your other options above, as needed during times when you don't want to look neutral.

The reason you're looking for a neutral something to do with your arms/hands is that most of the other options say things in body language you may not feel like saying, right? No need to elaborate on crossed arms, or arms akimbo. Hands clasped in front of you is what my HS drama teacher called Figleaf Position Number One and what it does is draw attention to the fact that you're covering up your genitals. Hands clasped behind you is Figleaf Number Two, and though it draws less attention, it still says "I'm guarding my butt."

"Other" as I have tried to to describe it says "I am a self-contained person who doesn't have to find something to do with my arms and hands," even though that may turn out to be a lie. It's the equivalent of someone who is able to endure some prolonged minutes of silence without having to break it, to fill it with something, anything, because silences must be filled, or in this case, you have to do something with your arms. Except that you don't, really. Another piece of stage advice my drama teacher gave, for those times when you're not really doing anything: "Don't just do something -- stand there."

CAVEAT: The stance doesn't work nearly as well if you have rotten posture. If you do, it then turns into one of two things: either your arms end up hanging sort of out in front of you, making you look like a knuckle-dragging troglodyte, or your arms are still at your sides, making you look constantly on the verge of a standing broad jump. So, don't have rotten posture, and you'll be fine.

BYPASS OPTION: You could just take your pants to a tailor and have him make you deeper pockets.

[cubanlord]

I voted other. I am usually throwing up a West Siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiddddddddddddddeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee......

or grabbing my johnson while walking to make sure I haven't dropped it somewhere.

[Njord]

Wow, looks like daskalos is a real expert on this subject!

Njord goes to practice with his mirror...

[Tiberious aka Sparkles]

[flotsam]

[Tiberious aka Sparkles]

[flotsam]

[Poemer]

I make delicious kimchi with my hands. It's why I'm such a superior golfer.

[TheUrbanMyth]

I hold them in a Kung-Fu stance.

Of course this tends to gradually unnerve people I am talking to as they think I am privy somehow to a soon- to-be attempted mugging. They stop talking and look quickly around them awaiting the savage attack they can see I have luckily anticipated.

[huck]

Hmm....I'm trying to visualize this....When do you spend so much time standing around? I might while waiting for the subway, and I usually have a newspaper or book, but other than that, I don't think I really do....

In class, I walk around flipping a marker in the air...

[Tiberious aka Sparkles]

As human beings we are innately self-conscious of our hands. Why? Why do we feel vulnerable when our hands are not preoccupied?

Come on, one of you fellows must have majored in anthropology or psychology.

Little help?

Sparkles*_*

[JongnoGuru]

pouring drinks or counting money (thumbing through the accountant's ledger)

[seoulkitchen]

I usually do two things:

1) The Copper. Hands in my back pockets (doesn't take up too much room, and best of all I can cop a feel on my ass!)

2) The Jesus. Get a long thing like a pool cue or a rifle, put it across your shoulders and drape your hands over the ends. Takes up a lot of room but it looks really cool. Kinda James Deanish..... (looks best with a rifle but I guess those are hard to come by, a long umbrella will do.)

[seoulkitchen]

Or your could imitate John Wayne....