Korean Job Discussion Forums

[Bulsajo]

I read the original article that the OP's article is a response to.
In it one of the teachers in favour of the propsed ban was quoted as saying 'They [party invites etc. and the exclusions/disappointments they generate] are not fair to teachers, who have to deal with the children's disappointment' or something like that.

Solution: you're in the wrong field, choose a new career.

[cosmicgirlie]

[canuckistan]

http://www.bethel.edu/~shenkel/TeachingMethods/Management/Consultant.html

This can apply to parenting as well.

[cosmicgirlie]

[laogaiguk]

I'll be quite honest and say I am extremely glad I am not the only one who cares about this or thinks the way things are going (like the article) is incredibly stupid Maybe there is still some hope...

I really agree with cosmicgirlie's first post (though I agree with all of them, just especially that one )

[cosmicgirlie]

[Ya-ta Boy]

The trick is not to protect kids from all negative experiences, but to (as much as possible) let them experience them in doses they can handle with a supporting hand in the background.

It seems to me to be a fruitless gesture to stop kids from handing out Valentine's cards when every kid in class knows who is in the in-crowd and who isn't. Rejection happens every day in recess and all after school activities. Having a school rule to eliminate one or two experiences is kind of useless, although the idea is kind of noble.

I do like the idea of more non-competitive activities. Winning is not the only thing. I remember a kid in high school who reported his dad had said the guy who came in second in the Olympics was a loser. I beg to differ on that.

I like to use 'competitive' activities in class, but I try to choose ones where no one's ego is involved. For example, I put different items in a jar and have the kids guess what is in the jar (by asking Y-N questions) and then anyone can win a piece of candy by making a wild guess about how many of the things there are in the jar. No skill involved. Just a wild guess. They enjoy the low level of competition and I get them to practice Y-N questions and counting.

[cosmicgirlie]

[Horangi Munshin]

[kermo]

I had a very very very hard time at school. It wasn't the fault of teachers who framed the activities in a way that left me behind, though they didn't (as far as I could see) go out of their way to smooth a path. Nevertheless, I was an absolute pariah. I inadvertantly spoke at an absurdly high vocabulary level, and kids literally couldn't understand me. My mother dressed me in clothes purchased by my grandmother at garage sales. Hence, I was weird-looking and weird-sounding (hopefully not weird-smelling) and my classmates reminded me of this constantly.

Living day-to-day in an atmosphere of fear and rejection did have an impact on me, and probably contributed to my continuing chronic depression, since continual sadness was definitely part of my formative years. However, I developed a strong and independent attitude, and eventually found like-minded peers who appreciated me by the time I was in my mid-teens, and found that the depression was responsive to medication. I learned to stand up for myself, to look at the world from the outside, and to see myself as an individual, not just "part of the crowd." Learning to like myself despite the opinions of my peers has been something I'm grateful for. I'm braver and maybe more original than I would have been if I'd been able to fly under the radar.

However, I wonder if I might have crumbled if I hadn't had a ferociously loving mother, a father who believed in me, and medical intervention when the depression threatened my life. Bullying may well cripple or destroy the kids who can't stand up to it.

As a teacher, I don't tolerate abuse (verbal or physical) in the classroom. I try to create an environment where kids appreciate each other's unique qualities, so they are recognized for something other than physical or intellectual success. When I was a classroom teacher, every week we picked a "Student of the Week" who proudly showed pictures, got plenty of respectful attention from the class, and also written compliments from each of the students.

I would hesitate to rank kids publically by test scores or race times, because it's true that each kid approaches the test with their own unique skills and circumstances. I prefer to point out effort or improvement.

I do hate to see kids trounced, or left behind. If some students are way ahead, I like to give them extra challenges, and if some students are way behind, it's possible to modify the task to help them keep up.

I don't think competition needs to be wiped off the map in schools. It's a fact of life. Children need to be taught to be "good winners" and "good losers." I would hesitate to back anything that sorts them into more permanant categories though.

[laogaiguk]

[The Man known as The Man]

For a review before a test on a Shakespearean play, I had all thje students stand up-if you got the question correct, you sat down-the last students standing needed to study the most.


They loved it!